HYUNG 54

“She insisted that she could draw on her own, so usually, I don’t look at her work, but yesterday I just didn’t think it was right. So, I tried to gently persuade her to let me look, but then she had to go and say something else. Stuff like, if she draws like that she won’t get into the university she wants, or that she doesn’t want to go to the same school the teacher went to. No matter how much of a saint Dohee Teacher is, that’s bound to make anyone angry. So, she was like ice the whole time.”

While judging people based on their academic background is a bad thing, because this was an entrance exam academy, categorizing schools by rank had naturally become a very common practice. Even so, the school Dohee Teacher graduated from was one of the universities many students aspired to attend.

“It’s a total mess, really.”

Wonkyu Teacher smiled faintly. It wasn’t a particularly happy smile; it felt more like self-derision. “Ah, maybe I should just change jobs…” he muttered, the voice just barely audible.

Perhaps the students sensed the atmosphere of the academy to some extent, as none of them were chatting or fooling around. They all looked very uncomfortable, tense and walking on eggshells. It felt like they might all transfer academies at this rate.

“Teacher Hwanoh, do you want some coffee? I’m going to buy one while I step out for a smoke.”

“I’m fine. I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep if I drink it now.”

“Then I’ll just buy something decaf on my own, so look after the kids for a bit!”

I had given a roundabout refusal, but Wonkyu Teacher whispered unilaterally into my ear and vanished. He really loves cigarettes. Is it inevitable when working at an entrance exam academy? Even for the preparatory class, it’s not like we’re completely removed from the entrance exams.

Come to think of it, I imagine Dohee Teacher, who is a full-time entrance exam instructor, must have a really hard time. The stress of being responsible for the admissions of new students every year must be no joke. …Especially with students like that fourth-year examinee.

While I looked over the work of a student whose sketch was off, corrected a drawing for the student two seats down, and critiqued another student’s piece, Wonkyu Teacher still hadn’t returned. Why is he so late? Just as I was wondering if it was okay for him to be this late, I heard the sound of the art room door opening.

“Teacher Hwanoh, sorry, sorry. Drink this.”

The drink Wonkyu Teacher handed me seemed to reek of heavy cigarette smoke, so I didn’t particularly want to drink it.

“Teacher, is something stressing you out lately?”

“Every single day is stress, what else. Do I smell a lot like cigarettes?”

“A little.”

“Sorry, sorry. I’ll look at the kids’ drawings now. You can rest for a bit.”

Taking advantage of the brief lull, I checked my phone. I naturally thought there would be a message from Ham Dowon, but there wasn’t. What’s this? Why isn’t there one? Shouldn’t there be? Thinking I might have checked wrong, I searched through my KakaoTalk and texts, but there was nothing. So, I sent one first.

What are you doing?

I checked social media (I saw a photo of a French landscape posted by Yoo Hwajung) and read the messages from Ye Hwanyoung (it was nothing special; today’s school lunch was bad, Hyung I want to go up to Seoul next month is that okay, etc. I sent a reply telling her to prepare for her midterms). During all that time, the ‘1’ next to the message I sent to Ham Dowon did not disappear. I suddenly felt worried. Wondering if something had happened again.

“Teacher, can I go out and make a quick phone call?”

“Yeah, yeah. Go ahead. While you’re heading out, could you possibly buy me a pack of throat lozenges at the convenience store? My throat feels dry. You can take the card on my desk.”

“Okay.”

I took Wonkyu Teacher’s blue card and stepped out of the academy. Even by the time I bought the throat lozenges at the convenience store, no reply had come. Did something happen again in the meantime, seriously… But I need him to pick up the phone to know anything. Where exactly was his house? Is he at the veterinary hospital again?

Standing in the narrow alley between buildings, I placed a call. Ring, ring, ring… Only the dial tone continued repeatedly. I felt frustrated. As I let out a deep sigh and ruffled my hair, my eyes met someone’s.

“…Ah. Hello.”

It was the Director. Even though I bowed my head in greeting, there was no response. Instead, the Director, who was staring at me with a crumpled expression, suddenly spoke up.

“Do you know I’m hearing talk about the preparatory class teacher smelling like cigarettes?”

“Pardon?”

“But come to think of it, those complaints only started after Teacher Hwanoh arrived. Students go home and tell their parents everything. They grumble that the art academy teacher smells like cigarettes. They say the preparatory class just reeks of smoke. I’m not saying a full-grown adult shouldn’t smoke, but at the very least! You should hold back when you’re dealing with kids! You’re not a child!”

“…”

I suppose there was no need to mention I’m a non-smoker. At times like this, it was better to just keep my mouth shut. I stood there silently with my head bowed, listening to the pouring shouts. Although it wasn’t my fault, at first I thought there was a somewhat valid reason, but as the voice and the content grew louder, it sounded like an unfair venting of anger.

“Leaving like this during class hours, too, huh! Shouldn’t all that time be measured and deducted from the hourly wage? If you have a conscience? Huh?”

“…”

“Are you going to take responsibility if our students don’t get into college? If the academy goes bankrupt and I’m left with nothing, what are you going to do!”

I’d rather just be cursed at once. The Director huffed for a long time, unable to overcome his own anger, trembling before walking away with thumping footsteps. I only raised my head and rubbed my temples long after the Director had distanced himself. I was so exhausted. However, there was still time left before my part-time job ended. As I returned to the art room, I repeatedly turned my phone screen on and off. Ham Dowon still hadn’t checked the message. my mood sank.

Feeling so exhausted and empty, I found myself walking into a snack shop on the way home. I regretted it for a moment after ordering tteokbokki and fried snacks. I was momentarily enticed by the spicy seasoning and the smell of oil that filled the void in my heart, but eating this kind of food at this hour wasn’t good for the body. Besides, I didn’t even want to eat it, nor was I hungry.

However, I couldn’t undo the order that had already been placed, so I leaned my cheek against the table and lay face down. I saw the graffiti scribbled on the wall.

Jiwon ♡ Gayoon

Jung Gayoon is an idiot!

While tracing the marks of the permanent marker with my finger, I checked my phone. Ham Dowon still hadn’t checked my message, so I called again. Ring, ring, ring… …The person you are calling is unavailable, connecting to voicemail…

“Ham Dowon, where are you and what are you doing? Making people worry.”

Even though the outgoing message had ended, I whispered into the receiver. There was no way an answer would come back. Moving my body slowly, I rubbed my face with my dry palms. I even considered whether I should file a missing person report. But I’m not his family, and I can’t do that just because I haven’t been able to contact him for a few hours.

Is he at home? Or at the veterinary hospital? Should I try calling the veterinary hospital? What was the name of that place? Ah, I wonder if they’re even open now. While I was tracing back my memory to find the location on a map app, I stood up at the employee’s word that the packaging was finished.

In the end, I returned home having gained nothing—well, nothing but tteokbokki and fried snacks. Since I wasn’t in a good mood, I stopped by a convenience store and bought some alcohol. When I entered the house, the sensor light illuminated only a very narrow area near the entryway, brightly showing the shoes I was wearing and the white sneakers with green stripes. I slowly raised my head.

“…”

In that space that was completely dark without a single ray of light entering—perhaps because the curtains were drawn—blue light was spread everywhere. That blue light wavered and shimmered slowly like water shadows.

On the bed, Ham Dowon was sleeping on his side, his hands neatly folded with his head resting on top of them. At that moment, my tension completely snapped and a laugh escaped me. While one person was thinking about missing person reports and such, the other was sleeping quite peacefully in my house.

I don’t know why, but I felt a bit better. Is it because someone is at home? I approached the bed.

“Ham Dowon.”

I pulled out one side of the wired earphones that were covering Ham Dowon’s ears and whispered into that ear. Even though I approached quite closely, there was no reaction.

“Hey, Ham Dowon. Why are you doing this on someone else’s bed, huh?”

Only after I raised my voice significantly did Ham Dowon’s closed eyes begin to tremble.

“Uu-ung…”

“Ham Dowon. Ham Dowon.”