HYUNG 51

The indoor slippers Ham Dowon had been wearing when he arrived were a total mess, with stones embedded in the soles and tears throughout. I tossed them into the trash and held out a pair of new slippers I had bought from the convenience store.

“I’m not sure if they’ll fit. I just bought them based on a rough guess.”

Ham Dowon sat there fidgeting, his feet resting quietly atop the new slippers. He stole glances at me while rubbing the chocolate smudged on his lips with the back of his hand.

“Is it good?”

“Yes. It’s delicious…”

“Eat the rest later.”

I tidied up the surroundings and stood up from my seat. Fortunately, the slippers fit Ham Dowon’s feet perfectly, so he managed to walk straight without staggering on his injured feet.

I checked on the cat after the payment and suturing were finished. Saja was sleeping soundly, curled into a ball, completely unaware that his owner had almost fainted from shock. Even though the cat looked fairly decent, Ham Dowon burst into tears again the moment he saw him. He stood rooted there, gasping for air, and I quickly pulled him outside, fearing he might actually lose his breath and collapse this time.

“Heueok, Hyung. Our Saja is so skinny, he’s so skinny… He couldn’t eat breakfast, so he’s so, so thin…”

In reality, Saja was on the plump side, except for his small head, just as Ham Dowon had described him before. He was by no means thin. He had been sleeping the whole time and hadn’t even cried for food.

“Just like you said, his head is small, but his body looked sturdy everywhere else. The doctor said so, too. We’ll have to wait for more tests to be sure, but there’s nothing to worry about.”

“But it was a fall, so if he hurt even his head… then… then…”

Even as he was being pulled along by me, Ham Dowon kept his head down, sobbing and wiping away tears with the back of his hand. It really looked like I was the one making him cry. …Not that I’ve never made him cry before, though.

“I’m hungry. What do you want to eat?”

“I… I don’t even deserve to eat. I don’t have to eat.”

“Well, I’m hungry. Just come with me.”

I led the crying guy to the nearest restaurant. It was an instant udon shop. I ordered one bowl of udon and two rolls of kimbap. Since it was an awkward time slightly past lunch, there weren’t many customers.

The few people there all glanced at Ham Dowon. A tall man crying in bloodstained pajamas on a weekday afternoon was certainly bound to stand out. However, it annoyed me that they were staring at a kid who was already having a hard time as if he were some kind of spectacle, so I stared right back at them. Only then did they all clear their throats and look away.

“I was really hungry earlier, but now that the food is out, I don’t think I can eat it all. Please eat some with me. We shouldn’t waste food.”

I held out a piece of kimbap that had come out immediately after ordering, likely prepared in advance. Ham Dowon just stared at the kimbap with a reluctant face. Seeing how he had devoured two chocolates, he was clearly hungry, but he only opened his mouth after swallowing hard once. I popped the kimbap inside.

“Chew thoroughly. Thoroughly.”

“Heueok, heuk… Hyung, it tastes so bad, it’s so bad… I make it way better…”

“Yeah. I bet your kimbap tastes way better. Still, we can’t leave leftovers, so have another one.”

“Yes, heuk. Heueok.”

And so, I had a bizarre meal, finishing off the instant udon with cheap fish cakes and two rolls of kimbap alongside the sobbing Ham Dowon.

Perhaps he really was hungry; despite grumbling that it tasted bad, the wailing Ham Dowon finished almost all the kimbap. True to the low price, there was nothing special about it and it was just cold, yet he stuffed it into his mouth until one cheek bulged out. Every time he did, I met his eyes and said quietly but clearly several times, “Thoroughly.” Ham Dowon nodded to show he understood and worked his jaw very diligently.

“Hyung, I… I’ll try going home. I have to go and clean up Saja’s blood, too. And also, also… what do I do? Our Saja’s toys are there, but Saja isn’t, and what if our Saja can’t come back from the hospital?”

Ham Dowon seemed to have no more tears left to shed; he was only gasping, his face no longer wet. Worried about his swollen, red face, I pressed an ice cup I’d bought at the convenience store against his cheek.

“There’s a movie I’ve been wanting to see, but it’s a horror movie so I couldn’t watch it alone. Watch it with me.”

“I’m at home— Sa, Saja isn’t there, but still, home, home…”

“Yeah. Go home. To my home.”

I hailed a taxi. After putting Ham Dowon in the back seat and sitting down next to him, I handed him the ice cup and gave the driver my address.

“You said your parents can’t come until the weekend anyway. What are you going to do in that big house all by yourself? I even skipped my part-time job today and I’m bored, so hang out with me.”

“But…”

“Just follow me. I have an extra blanket and pillow. I’m uneasy thinking something might happen if I leave you alone at home. And there’s no room in my freezer, so someone needs to finish off the ice cream. I couldn’t eat it all because it’s too sweet. I only know one person who likes sweets that much.”

“…Who?”

“Who else would there be besides you? I told you to drink water while you cry. You’ll have to drink two 2L bottles today.”

I rolled the ice cup over Ham Dowon’s face. The de-ro-rok de-ro-rok sound of ice sliding inside the thin plastic cup rang out.

After stopping by a convenience store near my house to buy two large bottles of water (Ham Dowon asked with a slightly terrified face, “Do I… have to drink all of this?”), some snacks including popcorn, and new underwear and socks, we went inside.

“Go wash up.”

I handed Ham Dowon a suitable short-sleeved T-shirt, shorts, and new underwear, and sent him to the bathroom. I was planning to pull out another blanket and pillow and tidy up the place in the meantime, but Ham Dowon came out much sooner than expected. In barely five minutes.

“Did you… not wash?”

But no. His hair was wet. The clothes I gave him fit perfectly, too. As expected, our builds were similar.

“I heard that if you shorten your shower ti, time, you can sa, heuk! save a lot of water.”

So he didn’t forget about environmental protection even in this state. Right. It was absurd, but quite commendable. I tucked the hair dryer into his hand and entered the bathroom myself.

Because Ham Dowon had just finished washing, the inside was slightly misty and warm. This feels a bit strange. Taking turns washing like this is something that usually happens at my parents’ house, or when going on a trip, or with a girlfriend…

“…”

I wondered what on earth I was thinking when I was the one who brought a crying kid here. I turned on the cold water and stood under it, then quickly turned it off, remembering Ham Dowon’s words about saving water. It ended with me just barely wetting my hair. After washing up in the most water-saving way possible, I went out to find Ham Dowon sitting under the bed, clutching the hair dryer. He had a gloomy face.

“I gave you that to dry your hair.”

“I just… thought of Saja, so…”

“Hug this instead.”

I took the hair dryer away, handed him a pillow, then brought over the ice cream and a spoon and sat down beside him.

“Give me your feet. I’ll put some medicine on them.”

Ham Dowon, who had his chin resting on the pillow, looked at me with melancholy eyes but obediently offered his feet. Now that they were clean, the wounds were even more visible. Fortunately, they weren’t deep, but the scratches scattered here and there didn’t look good.

Ham Dowon’s feet were pretty. His toes were long, his nails were well-trimmed, and there was no messy hair anywhere. His white feet, which hadn’t been tanned, and his peach-colored ankles looked as if they had been carved from plaster. If not for the red lines created by the injuries, they would have looked like artificial objects.

After I took out the disinfectant, I caught Ham Dowon’s gaze for a moment; it was filled with tension. As I applied the medicine, his eyes trembled slightly.

“Does it hurt?”

“No. It’s okay…”

“Then bear with it a little longer.”

As I lifted his foot to get a better look at the sole, his shorts lifted, revealing the inner thigh. Although it was too shadowed to see clearly, I was startled by the fact that my gaze had landed there for a split second, so I quickly looked away and focused excessively on the wounds on his foot. I disinfected them, applied medicine, and put on bandages. After repeating that process several times, I let go of his foot somewhat roughly.

“Do you want to watch the movie or not?”

“…I want to watch.”

“Okay.”

For no reason, I opened the lid of the ice cream Ham Dowon was holding, even peeling off the inner seal for him, before hurriedly getting up from my spot.