ORCA 17

“Young master, I, heuk…. Please do not hate me. I will listen to you….”

Orca knew it would be better to devour the goldfish, which was busy apologizing for a fault it had not even been questioned about, right at this moment. If he got rid of it from his sight, there would be no reason to get needlessly angry. He knew, and yet, reason won over instinct. No, perhaps it was instinct that had suppressed reason.

In the first place, his instinct was focused on eliminating things that were bothersome. But right now, he could not make a rash judgment. He could not easily decide if the goldfish was truly what he wanted to get rid of because it was bothersome, and thus if his instinct was telling him to swallow it. It was all ambiguous, what was instinct and which choice was a rational judgment. His own heart felt like it belonged to someone else. The more he tried to figure it out, the more confused he became.

This was a result foreseen from the moment he chose to stay longer at the mansion. From that point on, the boundary between instinct and reason had become unclear.

“Niah. What did I do to make you cry like this.”

Orca embraced Niah so tightly it seemed he might crush him. This too was a clear error.

By the time the commotion had settled, it was already night. Niah, who entered the bathroom at Orca’s command, just stood there for a while without doing anything. His mind was in a daze. Then, belatedly, he fumbled for the wall and turned on the light. The interior, which had been dark and reliant only on the moonlight coming through the window, was tinged with an orange glow along with a click.

Niah stood behind the partition that separated the entrance from the bathtub and quietly gazed at the hazy, brightened ceiling. The surroundings were so silent that the sound of his own breathing, exhaling and inhaling, felt loud. His head felt numb.

Suddenly, he slapped his own cheeks, smack, smack, and walked past the partition to the inner area. This was no time to stand around; there was something he had to do first.

After filling the large bathtub with water, Niah sat on the floor and tucked in his arms and legs. The bathtub was so big that about ten of him could probably fit inside. Hazy steam rose from the moderately warm water. Niah idly blew, whoosh, at the heat-haze-like vapor and pulled his knees in tightly. He rested his chin on them and wiggled the toes hidden inside his white socks.

With his fingertips, he traced the outline of the square tiles on the floor. Not knowing what else to do, he quietly killed time. When he turned his head and leaned his temple against his knees instead of his chin, the night that had settled over the mansion came into view. For some reason, he felt a little nervous, and his heart pounded, thump-thump.

One entire wall of the bathroom was made of glass. Niah looked at the dense forest and the star-studded sky and swallowed dryly, gulp. It felt as if the young master’s body heat was still enveloping his whole body. He felt a strange sensation. His chest felt flushed and ticklish. He felt like he might laugh, or he might cry. He had eaten a lot of delicious dinner and was definitely full, but he also felt hungry. A severe thirst followed.

As far as he could remember, this was a tremendously strange feeling he was experiencing for the first time in his life. It was as if someone was gripping his heart very tightly and would not let go. If possible, he wanted to be held by the young master one more time, just like before.

This was the first time Niah had waited for Orca. He had done similar tasks every morning and evening under the pretext of attending to his bath, but he had always just filled the tub with water and then left the bathroom. He would exit directly through the door that connected the bathroom to the hallway, just as Bailey had taught him, so it was difficult to say that he had actually attended to the bath.

He had been taught to only use the door leading to the hallway without passing through the room, but Niah always knocked on Orca’s door first when he went in. This was because he could see the young master, even if just for a moment. Deliberately walking slowly to see the young master’s face for a long time before going to the bathroom had been Niah’s routine for the past few days.

After leaving the bathroom, he would go prepare the pre-breakfast tea in the morning, and in the evening, he would go to do his remaining chores or, if he had time, go to catch up on much-needed sleep. Orca also never gave Niah any particular instructions.

“Do not go, wait for me.”

So, until this morning before he heard those words, that was how it had been.

Niah, who had been staring blankly at the scenery outside the window, turned his head in the opposite direction of the glass. Then he stared intently at the partition standing tall, obscuring the entrance. He wished the young master would come quickly, but at the same time, he hoped he would come slowly.

Niah could not stay still due to an unknown tension. He constantly fidgeted his toes, moving them swish, swish. His heart was still pounding, thump-thump.

Orca, who had sent Niah into the bathroom, immediately called another servant to clear the empty dishes. While the servant disappeared down the 4th-floor hallway pulling a trolley, his eyes remained closed. He had been concentrating only on the sound of the water jet hitting the bathtub, and after the sound of water stopped, he heard an unidentifiable sound, swish, swish.

Orca, who had been so engrossed in Niah, straightened the back he had been leaning against the sofa and opened his eyes. It felt as if a light weight was resting on his empty thighs. He slowly reflected on the situation from before.

‘Ugh, young master…. Young master, heuk, I was, I was wrong….’

The goldfish could not seem to stop crying. Worried it might faint, he pulled the small body into his arms and soothed it. He patted every part he could feel in his palm and whispered, yes, yes. The more he did, the deeper the goldfish burrowed into his embrace, begging pitifully, and it took a long time before it finally started breathing evenly.

Even after that, it would occasionally flinch and tremble in fear for no reason. At this, he could not even sigh properly. He just kept moving his hand, pat, pat, until the body, tensed and stiff even while being held, had completely relaxed.

He did not like the food on the table that had gone cold. But he thought it would be better to feed him first, so he chose one of the various dishes with his eyes. The soft egg dish seemed passable. He could not pick up the plate with his cloth-wrapped hand, so he extended his left arm, which had been supporting his back. The goldfish, thinking he was trying to push him away, hastily clung to him.

‘You are hungry.’

The goldfish, who would usually grin, hehe, if anything was put in his mouth, frantically shook his head and said, I am not hungry. It was obviously a lie. As soon as the words “not hungry” were out, a growl echoed. The goldfish’s stomach did not listen to its owner and begged him for food.

‘Ah…. I am sorry….’

Caught in a flimsy lie that he had not believed in the first place, the goldfish quickly became sullen and hunched his shoulders. He then clutched his own stomach with both hands. Funnily enough, it looked pitiful. Never in his life had he ever, for a single moment, considered anyone pitiful.

Not even when a member of his unit, dragging his tattered legs, returned to the barracks only to die before his eyes not long after. He had only estimated and planned how to replenish the numbers. For someone like him to feel pity for a mere goldfish that could not even hide its hunger was absurd.

This was an error. It was clearly a colossal error, to the point of being disconcerting. It was right to cut it out before it spread further. It was an extremely simple matter of just swallowing the goldfish, which was not even a mouthful.

While he was lost in such pathetic thoughts, the goldfish bit his lip hard and watched his expression. His feet, placed between his thighs, fidgeted, and his tiny voice saying, I am sorry, was once again tinged with tears.

‘It is okay.’

Without realizing it, he pressed his lips to the top of the goldfish’s head. To soothe him so he would not cry anymore, he stroked the body he was hugging all over. The goldfish, who had obediently entrusted his body to him, struggled not to be separated from his embrace. At that, the area around his solar plexus felt tight and uncomfortable. A warning signal that he must not commit any more errors struck his mind.

‘Young master….’

Nevertheless, he could not stop easily.

The goldfish, a hearty eater, finished all the food on the table by himself. With a spoon in one hand and a plate in the other, he ate well, nibble, nibble. When he put down an empty plate and was handed a new one, he did not refuse and accepted it readily.

The thought that he must have jumped into the lake every time because he could not get his fill like this in the past brought a flicker of annoyance. Whether it did or not, the goldfish diligently scraped the plate. The claim that he was not hungry was definitely a lie.

‘Are you not eating, young master…?’

A servant sitting on his thigh, mumbling and offering him a spoon, was probably a sight unique to this goldfish. A dry laugh escaped him. The goldfish, perhaps thinking he was laughing because he was happy, followed his lead and raised the corners of his mouth into a gentle smile. When he accepted the food as requested, his round eyes also curved into a grin. His simple-mindedness seemed to be innate. An impure sensation slowly crept up from the soles of his feet.

Orca, who had been listening intently to the sounds from the bathroom, got up from the sofa and headed to the dress room. With neat hands, he took off his clothes and put on a robe over his naked body. Tying the waist sash loosely, he came out and stopped in front of the bathroom door. From inside, the unidentifiable swish, swish sound was still being made. He let out a sigh that filled his lungs and hesitated to enter readily.

Making Niah wait was, in fact, close to an impulse. He thought that if he left him like this, he might think he was being punished again and start crying his eyes out. He also considered just letting him misunderstand like that.

Orca was extremely bothered by himself, for acting so unlike himself since coming to the mansion. He regretted breaking the boring peace. If he had not gone to the lake that day, this error would not have occurred.

“Young master….”

Suddenly, a mumbling voice leaked out. At the cautious call seeking him, Orca, as if bewitched, threw open the bathroom door. Niah’s mouth hung open, amazed that the young master had appeared as if by magic at the same time he had called for him. It was strange, because he had said it so quietly that there was no way he could have heard. As expected, the young master seemed to be an amazing person. He knew everything even without seeing.

The noise of the door opening and closing sounded, and he saw the young master passing the partition. The young master glanced down at him, then went to the sofa at the foot of the tub, untied his waist sash, and laid down his robe. His naked body, bathed in moonlight and dim lighting, was stark. Resting his chin on his knees, he stealthily rolled his eyes and stole a glance at the young master’s physique.

The young master was taller and had a larger build than anyone else in the mansion. Unlike his own skinny and plain body, his form, covered in rugged muscles, was so cool that he could not take his eyes off it. Moreover, he had an incredible number of scars.

The young master stood facing the window, cracked his neck vertebrae, crack, crack, then turned around and looked at him. Their eyes met, so he had to abruptly lower his head in the middle of his diligent observation. Afterward, something fell into the bathtub with a plop, followed by the sound of water being parted, splash, splash, which soon quieted down.

When he peeked at the bathtub, his eyes met again with the young master, who was sitting with the elbow of his injured arm resting on the edge of the tub.

“Pervert.”

Orca flicked his wet hand, scattering droplets onto Niah’s face. Niah flushed red at the word “pervert.”

“I am not. I was just, just looking….”

“Sure you were not.”

Feeling slightly wronged, Niah bit his lips repeatedly and quickly got up to bring the bath brush. Even if he denied it further, there was no way to prove it. He also felt that it was true he had been watching like a pervert, so he had no excuse to offer.

Orca watched the goldfish looking embarrassed beside him and stirred the surface of the water. Rich foam bubbled up to fill the tub, and the scent Niah loved filled the bathroom.

Niah quietly sniffed, sniff, sniff, and moved closer, rolling up his sleeves. Then he put the bath brush into the water to soak it thoroughly and began to gently scrub Orca’s arm. This was not why he had told him to wait, but he let him do as he pleased.

After a few scrubs, Niah soon forgot about the brushing and focused only on caressing the scars etched into the hard forearm. He did not forget to sneak in a few sniffs.

“It is all healed.”

Niah’s gaze shifted from the scarred arm to the other hand wrapped in cloth. Orca noticed this keenly.

“This will heal soon. Who is worried about whom right now.”

At the chiding that was not quite a chiding, Niah grew sullen and, as was his habit, watched his expression. His hand, which had gently pulled away, now only tormented the bath brush pointlessly.

Orca did not welcome this reaction. It was just a short while ago that he had almost killed Niah. The goldfish, who had no idea what he had almost been subjected to, was annoying him by worrying about him. Of course, he had no intention of telling him. The thought of him getting scared and running away made his insides twist.

Orca silently looked at the goldfish, who had become intimidated by his simple words. Then his gaze moved down to the feet fidgeting below the bathtub. His fingertips gently landed on the white sock.

“Look here.”

It was the spot he had stomped on earlier to prevent him from running away. Niah hesitated, then put down the bath brush and gingerly took off his sock to show him. He was so embarrassed to show his foot to the young master that his toes curled. Orca paid no mind and gently caressed the soft, tender skin.

“Does it hurt?”

“Yes…? …Ah, it does not hurt. It does not hurt at all.”

Only then remembering his foot had been stepped on, Niah shook his head vigorously. It really did not hurt at all. In fact, what hurt right now was his side, which was bruised from being constantly poked by Pepe.

“Really?”

The hand caressing the top of his foot moved up his calf, stroked his wrist, brushed past his hair, and rubbed his forehead. Niah, as if by habit, snuggled against the touch, nuzzle, nuzzle. But the pleasant touch soon moved away.

As Niah’s lips parted in disappointment, Orca unceremoniously stuck a thumb into his mouth, pressing and stimulating the tip of his tongue in a circular motion. Despite the willful act, the goldfish naturally began to suck on his finger, making his already uncomfortable heart throb with a dull ache. Contrary to his inner turmoil, a random demand shot out of his mouth.

“Niah. Come in here.”

“Eh?”

Niah’s eyes widened as he asked back with a muffled sound. Orca, having pulled out his finger, just watched the flustered Niah, resting his chin on his hand.

“But…. Um, ah…. Uh….”

Niah, clutching his knees, could not readily comply and watched his expression. Showing his naked body was much, much more embarrassing than showing his foot. However, the embarrassment lingered for only a moment before quickly fading.

“You can come in with your clothes on. If you come in now, you will smell just like me. You like that, do you not.”

At Orca’s coaxing, Niah reacted instantly. He quickly took off his other sock and rolled up his pant legs. Then he quickly stood up and got into the bathtub. His clothes were instantly soaked by the warm water. The soft foam on the water’s surface was pushed aside slightly in the direction Niah moved. Contrary to his bold entry, he stood there blankly, at a loss. His gaze scanned the bathtub here and there.

Orca grabbed Niah, who was wandering around not knowing where to sit, pulled him, and made him settle between his thighs. Niah, submerged precariously up to his shoulders, quietly took a deep breath. A smile naturally formed at the refreshing and cozy scent, like being in a forest. It felt exactly like being snuggled tightly in the young master’s arms.

Niah curled his body and leaned his back against Orca. He admired the dense forest and the sparkling stars visible through the large glass window. This time, his toes curled because it felt so good.