LLU 56

“Anyway, what wouldn’t suit you. With this face.”

Tok. The tip of Choi Junghan’s finger touches my cheek and then falls away. His fingers, still cool, resembled the season that had come to visit us now.

Yes, come to think of it, it was last autumn. The time when I first encountered Choi Junghan’s existence in my life.

“…Are you going to buy all of that?”

By now, the bundle of clothes the employee was holding had turned into a huge pile. My face, as I looked at Choi Junghan, must have looked completely dazed. Because the price tag attached to the one piece of clothing he had picked up earlier saying it suited me well showed an amount worth several million won even at a quick glance.

“Why? Do you need more?”

“There’s nowhere for me to wear them anyway. Don’t buy them.”

“Wear them on a day like today.”

He replied nonchalantly and took out a black card from his wallet, handing it to the employee. I licked my lips once with my tongue.

Even though the price felt unreal to the point of being absurd, rather than being shocked, I became dazed. It wasn’t my money, but I couldn’t understand him spending tens of millions of won in a place that had no particular use.

“…The price is too much.”

I said it in a voice so low it was barely audible, directed toward Choi Junghan. The corners of his mouth curved smoothly.

“I’m thankful that you’re thinking of me, but hearing that from you just over this much hurts my pride a little.”

Seeing him look strangely pleased, I gave up and shut my mouth. If he wanted to spend money excitedly wherever he pleased because he had too much of it, there was no reason for me to desperately stop him.

I followed him around leisurely, looking around. The scenes of the world that had initially felt like too much stimulation gradually found their place in my field of vision and became familiar.

I occasionally checked my watch. To gauge how many hours were left until tomorrow came. The watch that Choi Junghan had put on my wrist at some point was appropriately heavy and shone dazzlingly under the department store’s lights.

Even while looking at a watch priced at a level that would shock anyone my age, I could now vaguely guess. There was probably a location tracker attached to this watch to monitor me. Not just the watch, but everything I wore on my body.

However, I no longer felt any resistance. Once I accepted all the facts I had to accept, I became calm. All the other useless, cumbersome emotions were filtered out completely, as if caught in a fine mesh.

“Stop fidgeting.”

A dry voice flew over from across the table.

“Does the food not suit your taste?”

Unlike when he let me get my hair cut or when he bought me clothes, his tone was slightly displeased. Without answering, I stared at him quietly for a moment.

Every time Choi Junghan acted like this, I wanted to ask him. Why do you look upset whenever I don’t eat properly? Why do you frown and roughly hold me whenever my pants become loose? What does my body weight have to do with your mood?

“…I don’t have much appetite.”

A sound barely leaked out from my cracked throat.

“Why.”

He stares at me. With eyes like a preserved reptile that contain not a single grain of emotion.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Why.”

Choi Junghan repeated the same question like a machine. In front of him, I hesitated for a long time.

“…Because I feel so pathetic.”

“I understand, so tell me.”

No matter how much I dragged it out, no matter how much I repeated things that went nowhere, he showed no sign of irritation. Over the past few months with Choi Junghan, I had vaguely realized one thing. While he pushed me mercilessly when I pushed him away, he showed quite a lot of patience when it came to my whining.

“Tomorrow… you have to go to work.”

“That’s right. It’s Monday.”

Hearing Choi Junghan reply in his usual tone, anger suddenly surged up. At his attitude that seemed as if it had nothing to do with him, my mood naturally plummeted.

It felt like I was the only one riding a roller coaster. With no defenses at all, my body loaded onto the vertically plunging ride was mercilessly slammed downward. The feeling of being thrown to the ground quickly writhed like a half-broken earthworm, spewing out misery.

“Alone….”

“…….”

“…I don’t want to be alone.”

I barely managed to say just that one sentence. The resonance of the words I uttered was heavier and more sorrowful than I had vaguely anticipated.

“…I’m scared. When I’m alone… too many idle thoughts come up.”

“…….”

“So… it hurts.”

Tears overflowed and streamed quickly down my cheeks. Choi Junghan clicked his tongue and took out a handkerchief from inside his jacket, handing it to me.

I silently accepted the one that still carried his strong scent, but I didn’t wipe my tears with it. I just clutched it tightly.

“You hate Mondays even more than I do, a working adult.”

I stared piercingly at his face as he spoke indifferently. Like someone standing at the crossroads of life and death, I waited anxiously for his answer.

I desperately wanted to follow him to his company somehow. I wanted to be by Choi Junghan’s side. Although I knew nothing about the company, I vaguely guessed that he, holding the title of Executive Director, would have his own private office. So it wouldn’t be too unreasonable a request. If I pleaded with him just a little more earnestly…

“Then what should I do. Should I tuck you under my arm and go to work?”

Finally, Choi Junghan said that. A faint glimmer of hope appeared in the dark gap.

“I was trying to refrain as much as possible from getting aroused even in the office.”

“…Take me with you.”

I bowed my head. I could see my hands trembling finely on my knees. A transparent teardrop fell onto them with a plop.

“I’ll behave… quietly.”

“Hmm, well.”

He smiled leisurely and watched me with eyes full of interest. While fully receiving his gaze that looked like he was eyeing prey, I openly showed my impatience. If only my pleading could pique his interest, I could do as much of this as needed.

“I won’t be a bother. I won’t disturb you. I won’t make any sound….”

I clenched my trembling fist tightly.

“…Take me with you. Don’t leave me alone….”

Misery slowly flooded in and soaked me. While quietly watching the emotions that came like waves, I closed my eyes and waited for his answer.

The touch of a hand resembling autumn touched the corner of my eye. Choi Junghan’s hand, which silently wiped away my tears, continued to stroke my face like that for a while.

I didn’t open my eyes. While meekly receiving the touch that took away the heat from my flushed face, I continued to sit like that.

“Your whining is increasing more and more.”

Choi Junghan, who had laughed with a “pfft,” finally said that. In a quiet tone, yet as if gently scolding me. I added no words. I simply lowered my slightly wet gaze and waited for his permission.

And right the next day, I came to sit in the seat next to him as he went to work.

Along with the feeling of my body floating, the elevator soared upward. The company building with good natural light was dazzling from the lobby floor. Overall, the company gave a bright and cheerful impression.

However, the scenery visible through the open elevator doors was different. Even just looking at the simple and sophisticated monochrome interior, I could immediately tell that from here on, this was his own space where his taste was fully reflected.

“Good morning, Executive Director.”

“Good morning.”

The three or four secretaries sitting at the desk stood up and greeted him. Choi Junghan lightly nodded and headed straight into his office without hesitation.

I tried not to look around too much and followed him with quick steps while slightly lowering my gaze. I could feel glancing eyes sticking to my back, so I closed the office door as soon as I entered.

“…….”

The sense of oppression given by his space was more than I had vaguely imagined.

The spacious yet perfectly organized monotone office made anyone who entered feel pressure naturally. The feeling that not a hint of comfort could be found resembled the owner of this space.

I recalled the image of Choi Junghan receiving endless reports and handling work even after work hours. Even though only a few minutes had passed since I came to work with him, I could naturally sense his position in this space.

“Sit comfortably. Don’t make that lost-child face.”

Choi Junghan, who had taken off his coat and hung it up, pointed to the sofa. After staring at the nameplate on the desk that read ‘Executive Director Choi Junghan,’ I sat down silently.

At that moment, the office door opened and a neatly dressed secretary entered. Choi Junghan turned on the computer and briefly organized the desk while giving a short command.

“Coffee, please. Prepare a sweet one for that side.”

“Yes, understood.”

Soon after, the door opened again, and a secretary came in carrying a tray with refreshments, placing them on the table. After bowing once, the secretary who had prepared hot coffee for Choi Junghan and an iced latte with cookies for me left.

“Eat some cookies and play over there. If you’re bored, we can talk. I’ll give you a sketchbook and crayons.”

His voice carried a faint hint of amusement. Without responding to his lame joke, I took a sip of the coffee. It was sweet, probably with syrup added. I also opened a luxurious-looking cookie and put it in my mouth.

In the quiet space, only the crunching sound of me eating cookies echoed. I openly looked at Choi Junghan, who had created silence in no time, but he no longer gave me any attention.

Having immediately started working, Choi Junghan acted as if I wasn’t even in the office. His gaze remained fixed only on the computer or documents. Meanwhile, I quietly ate cookies and watched such a Choi Junghan.

The morning passed slowly. While I idled away time like a good-for-nothing, at least four or five people came and went. They entered one by one, briefly reported on changed schedules, or placed documents needing approval on Choi Junghan’s desk.

The way Choi Junghan dealt with them was not much different from at home. His arrogant, tyrant-like temperament was fully revealed here as well.

“Are you seriously bringing this to me as a report? Do you want to be completely humiliated at the board meeting?”

At his cold voice, the shoulders of the man standing in front of him flinched. I put down the cookie I was eating and held my breath while watching the scene.

“The scope itself is wrong from the start. That’s why the projected revenue and timeline are all messed up. How do you expect each team to even start the project like this?”

“…I’m sorry.”

“Is Team Leader Kim an intern? Do I have to point out every single one of these basic things right now?”

His voice was so cold that even I, listening, felt pitiful. The only difference was that the patience he showed when soothing me while I was breaking things and breathing unsteadily did not apply here.

After observing several people coming in with serious faces and leaving with drooping shoulders, the entire morning had already passed.

“We should have lunch. Tell me what you want to eat.”

The tyrant himself spoke to me in his usual tone, asking only about lunch options. I stared at him quietly with a dazed face.

“…It’s no different here or at home. You’re going to suck the life out of people.”

“If you say it like that, hyung will feel hurt, Oon-ah.”

Saying so in a soft tone, he narrowed his eyes.