Vol 5 Ch 22

As they walked along the corridor, Inseop’s eyes fell on the people gathered in the prayer room.

“Would you like to pray there?”

Inseop responded with a ‘what?’ to Wooyeon’s sudden question.

“Your face looked like you wanted to.”

“’No, I was just looking.”

Wooyeon tilted his head slightly.

“Although I generally like this, I just can’t understand religions even though I try.”

Inseop knew Wooyeon’s study had several humanities books related to religion. He felt a little strange, but knowing Wooyeon had a wide range of reading interests, he brushed it off.

“’…Yes.”

“Giving money to invisible objects or praying is like that. Isn’t it better to do something else at prayer time?”

Inseop chuckled awkwardly. Wooyeon knew that if he really wanted something, he would find a way to get it.

“…Yes.”

“Although it’s not visible, I went to church a few times as a child. It was difficult. I fell asleep many times because I found the pastor’s words boring.”

Wooyeon’s eyes were filled with affection as he watched his lover actively responding to what he said.

As a child, Wooyeon had been taken by his mother to a cathedral, not a church. There was nothing special about the cathedral. A priest in a robe constantly recited a prayer loudly. It was similar to the time when pastors preach.

It was so boring and tedious. If there was one slight difference, it was that the priest muttered prayers in an incomprehensible language, and that the priest was somewhat famous for his exorcism rituals.

It was the final act of plea from a mother whose son showed no signs of improvement despite treatment at a mental hospital. It would have been simpler if he had pretended to be sick rather than being actually sick. After sprinkling holy water a few times and reciting a few prayers, it would have been over.

“Hmm, really?”

Lee Wooyeon responded as if he couldn’t believe it.

“There have been times when I pretended to be sick because I didn’t want to go.”

At that, Inseop lamented his dark past with a serious expression.

Lee Wooyeon swallowed a laugh with an expressionless face.

When he was young, every time the holy water droplets fell on his face, he imagined taking down the priest’s head with the large cross hanging on the wall. Of course, it remained just an imagination. At that age, he knew well that if he acted as he wished, it wouldn’t end with treatment but could lead to being confined in the hospital forever.

“…It’s true. Please believe me.”

He looked up with eyes full of innocence, pleading for belief in his guilt. Judging by all the love stories he had experienced so far, Choi Inseop was more than justified in visiting that priest a hundred times holding his hand.

“But it’s true….”

Inseop’s eyebrows drooped slightly, feeling aggrieved. Lee Wooyeon thought he had done well not to strike the priest’s head with a cross. If he had done so at that time, he might have lived without even meeting this person.

“Okay, I’ll believe you.”

Lee Wooyeon pushed up Inseop’s drooping eyebrows with the tip of her finger.

“After all, religion is a business that never fails. It’s about gaining spiritual victory over weak humans. Excuse me for a moment.”

Lee Wooyeon pressed the elevator button and apologized to the person standing in front. The woman who was standing in front turned around in surprise at the suddenly heard heavenly trumpet-like voice.

Suddenly, what CEO Kim said came to Inseop’s mind.

‘I’m glad Wooyeon doesn’t care about religion. If he had been a cult leader, a lot of people would have died for real. Anyway, if you’re going to cheat, an actor is better.’

A mild and beautiful face. Even an attitude that seemed holy at first glance. Add to that a voice that could melt your eardrums.

“We’re here.”

When the elevator arrived, Lee Wooyeon turned to Inseop. When their eyes met, it felt like his heart sank. CEO Kim was right.

… I’m glad he became an actor.

“Get in.”

“…Thank you.”

Lee Wooyeon followed Inseop into the elevator. The people inside looked at him in passing.

“So, what do you think about it, Inseop?”

Lee Wooyeon’s gentle voice stood out in the quiet elevator. Inseop raised his head in surprise.

“About religion.”

“Yes? …Oh, my thoughts, um…”

People’s attention poured onto Inseop as well. He broke into a cold sweat. He stood so close to Lee Wooyeon in the narrow elevator that their knees touched. No one opened their mouths. It felt like everyone was listening to Lee Wooyeon and his conversation. Inseop clenched and released his clothes and reluctantly spoke.

“When it’s difficult, naturally such feelings arise. Depending on a transcendent entity or hoping for a miracle, so…?”

The time it took to descend to the first floor felt like an eternity. Inseop wore a puzzled expression, groping for words.

“Because there are parts that effort alone cannot handle, from the desire for someone to do it for me somehow…?”

Ding. The elevator door opened with a sound. As people got off, Inseop breathed a sigh of relief and looked up. He met eyes with Lee Wooyeon. In his eyes, which had been smiling until now, a deep affection flickered.

“So, Inseop also agrees with my thoughts.”

“Me, me?”

“If it’s difficult, hoping for a miracle. That’s a fucking spiritual victory, right?”

Inseop worried if anyone heard Wooyeon’s vulgar expression. Lee Wooyeon laughed with mischievous eyes. It was a different expression from the face he saw in front of the clinic. Inseop felt his tension loosen in his suddenly relaxed behavior. He felt a tender affection as if dealing with a child. Suddenly, he became curious. Did he, too, when faced with a terrifying moment he couldn’t handle, pray to God or hope for his weakness?

“Have you ever prayed?”

“No.” came the firm reply, a response befitting Lee Wooyeon. Inseop smiled faintly.

“But yesterday…”

Wooyeon’s gaze drifted over Inseop’s smiling face, the same face he had watched all night without respite in the darkness.

“I thought, if there was a God who could prevent you from getting hurt, I would kneel before him and even lick his feet.”

“… …”

Instead of relying on divine intervention, the man laid bare his weaknesses and confessed his genuine feelings for his partner. Inseop remained silent.

“Wait here. I’ll bring the car.”

It was a considerable walk to the parking tower.

“Let’s go together.”

As Inseop moved forward, Wooyeon raised his hand to the air, noting, “It’s raining.” Raindrops had been sporadically falling from the heavily overcast sky.

“I’ll be back soon. Wait here.”

Exiting the building, Wooyeon mimicked a phone call gesture, saying, “Call me if anything happens.” Inseop nodded quickly.

In the lobby, Inseop sighed, watching Wooyeon’s retreating figure. Memories of his actions from yesterday began flooding back.

“Ha…”

Inseop sighed, rubbing his reddened cheek. He had shown an embarrassing side to Wooyeon.

“I’m like a child… It’s embarrassing, really.”

“You’re such a fool, you idiot…”

As Inseop muttered self-critically, Wooyeon arrived, driving the car. Inseop quickly got into the passenger seat. Wooyeon glanced at Inseop and asked, “What’s wrong?”

“Huh?”

“Your face is red. Were you thinking of something inappropriate by yourself?”

“Oh, no. I don’t do that outside.”

Wooyeon chuckled, gripping the steering wheel.

“Then do you only think inappropriate thoughts inside?”

Inseop didn’t answer, instead gazing out the window. Wooyeon lightly tapped Inseop’s cheek with his hand, teasingly asking, “Hmm?” Knowing Wooyeon’s persistent nature, Inseop replied with a resigned tone.

“Generally…”

Wooyeon glanced at Inseop.

“Seems like you still do.”

“Huh?”

“Not here in the car.”

A mischievous smile played on Wooyeon’s lips. Inseop quickly shook his head.

“Ah, I wasn’t thinking anything inappropriate…”

Inseop glanced down, clutching his clothes.

Waking up that morning, he had locked eyes with Wooyeon staring down at him.

‘Did you sleep well?’

There was an unmistakable concern in his gentle voice.

… He probably didn’t sleep at all.

Inseop’s heart sank with regret.

“… I feel embarrassed.”

“Why?”

“I feel like I acted scared and overly dramatic for no reason. I’m sorry. It’s nothing.”

Inseop smiled awkwardly, apologizing again. “I’m sorry.”

Wooyeon’s smile faded from his eyes. He gripped the steering wheel tightly. His voice lowered as he spoke.

“It’s not nothing.”

His voice grew notably softer.

“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.

Although Inseop was timid and reserved, he never acted harshly or became upset over trivial matters. Ever since promising not to conceal his physical condition, he was willing to admit when he wasn’t well. He appreciated the genuine earnesty that accompanied Inseop every time, enough to wish for such honesty regularly.

Inseop held onto himself with trembling hands, consumed by anger as he questioned his thoughts from the day before.

‘… It’s not okay. None of it is okay.’

His eyes reflected deep fear. Desperately, he prayed silently that it was his fault.

‘I’m sorry. I promised and broke it. Please don’t be angry…’

He felt like he was losing his mind, the frustration reaching a boiling point. He should have noticed immediately when Inseop came to him; he cared for him deeply… Without a second thought, he embraced him, kissed him… If he had been a more composed person, he wouldn’t have reveled in such extraordinary affection; instead, he would have felt uneasy and ensured the other’s well-being. Overwhelmed by self-loathing, Lee Wooyeon found himself speechless.

And then came that moment.

‘I love you.’

Inseop confessed his feelings, leaving Wooyeon breathless.

‘I love you. So much.’

Each time, the sensation overtook him…

‘That’s why I came. I wanted to see Lee Wooyeon.’

Whenever the timid Inseop gathered the courage to speak those words, his emotions seemed on the verge of unraveling, leaving him fearful, almost wanting to cling to him, pleading for his life.

All night, he had watched Inseop sleep, a habit he had developed on sleepless nights. The rounded forehead, closed eyes, delicate eyebrows, and regular breaths – all so beautiful and endearing. Gently, he caressed Inseop’s hair, nuzzling into the curve of his neck.

Beautiful. So beautiful…

Lee Wooyeon swallowed hard, knowing he would never experience such emotions again. With resolve, he gripped the steering wheel.

“… It means a lot to me.”

As much time as he spent in bed during his childhood, Inseop might have had many painful days. However, there was no need to pass them off as natural or trivial. At least not in front of him.

“So, go ahead and act as silly as you want. It’s a request.”

“…Thank you.”

Inseop’s face brightened again. Wooyeon patted Inseop’s cheek with the back of his hand and started the car. By the time they reached the tunnel, traffic had begun to slow down.