HL 71

“How have you been all these years?” The woman forced herself to speak, but then paused, as if regretting that her words sounded a bit harsh.

“Alright.”

“You were on that TV show, boxing, right? You even won the championship. For a while, I could see news about you everywhere on my phone.”

“…”

“Later… suddenly there was no news at all. You were gone from TV, and I couldn’t find out anything even when I asked others. Nanxiao, what happened to you?”

Xu Nanxiao didn’t dodge, his tone as flat as if he were talking about someone else’s business: “Yeah, something happened. I couldn’t control it well in the ring, and the opponent couldn’t be saved.”

The woman’s face instantly turned pale, her lips trembling. After a long while, she said with a crying tone, “Why didn’t you tell your family?”

“Tell them what? Didn’t I make it through anyway?” Xu Nanxiao said briefly. Those days of wandering and displacement were condensed into a few temperatureless words.

The woman couldn’t help it and cried quietly for a good while, and Xu Nanxiao just watched her quietly like that. After a long time, she hunched over and wiped the corner of her eye with rough fingers, “Where did you go later? How did you live?”

“After that, I stayed in Beijing all along, and things are pretty good now.”

“Beijing? Beijing is good, Beijing is the capital after all.” She laughed as she cried, her rough nose tip red, “Mom has never been out of the city, and has always wanted to take a train and go see Beijing. Have you ever been on a train? Is Beijing especially nice? Are there especially many tall buildings? Have you been to Tiananmen Square?”

Xu Nanxiao was stunned for a moment, then answered truthfully: “Ridden one, good, many, been there.”

She suddenly remembered something, rummaged through a messy drawer for a long time, fished out a bottle of pure milk, wiped it clean, and handed it to Xu Nanxiao.

“Nanxiao, drink some milk, it’s good for your health.”

Xu Nanxiao lowered his head and looked; this milk would expire in a month. If he hadn’t come today, would she have drunk this bottle of milk? Or would she have kept saving it, reluctant to drink it?

Xu Nanxiao suddenly felt his heart feel terribly clogged.

Not because he forgave her, not because he recalled her good points, and not even because she was his own mother.

He just felt that a woman had never left the city or ridden a train in her whole life, and even though this place was so close to Beijing, she hadn’t even been able to see the Tiananmen Square she had always wanted to go to. Living in a dilapidated, drafty house, she couldn’t bear to drink the cheapest off-brand milk.

He remembered when he won his first major tournament prize money, the money was deposited into his card, followed by countless zeros after the numbers. That very night, he opened a suite in the most expensive hotel in the city, and the next day he went to pick up a car whose engine roar could shatter half a street. Every day after that was filled with all sorts of cocktail parties, men and women whose faces he couldn’t remember, all paid for by him.

Would a tiny leak through his fingers have been enough for her to take a hundred train rides and make a few hundred round trips to Beijing?

Back then, Xu Nanxiao hadn’t forgotten her; he deliberately chose not to think about her. Even when he did think of it, it was about being beaten by the old bastard back then, with blood splashing onto his eyelids while he hugged his head and cowered in the corner, seeing through the gap between his arms that she was standing right behind the curtain of the inner room.

Just standing there.

But now, Xu Nanxiao suddenly felt, what could he demand of her? She was just such a little woman.

She hadn’t read many books, hadn’t seen much of the world, and no one had ever planted the idea of rebellion in her heart. A pitiful, pathetic, and helpless little woman.

However, the pear soup she cooked was really delicious. The stitches she sewed were dense and beautiful. She would tell him bedtime stories. When he skipped classes, she would clumsily make up excuses for him to the teacher. She would wrap candies given by others in paper and bring them home…

Xu Nanxiao’s throat rolled slightly. He took out the ring and pushed it to the middle of the table, “Here, your thing. I just came to return this to you.”

The woman was stunned for a moment, and her eye rims turned red again. She shook her head, simply refusing to reach out and take it. Then she raised her eyes, looking at Xu Nanxiao pitifully, terrified that his next sentence would be to draw a clear line between them.

“Anyway, I’ve returned it to you, I’m leaving.” Xu Nanxiao stood up, walked to the door, but then suddenly stopped.

He was silent for a moment, then let out a sigh, turned his head, and said softly, “Mom, I’ll come to see you again when I have time.”

His mother widened her eyes in disbelief, tears plating a film over her eyes.

Soon, she smiled again, her tears shattered by her blinking eyelashes. Then his mother nodded hard, just like when she used to watch Xu Nanxiao off to school in his youth:

“Okay! Pay attention to safety on the way!”

Xu Nanxiao came out into the courtyard, and Ying Yusheng was still using yellow millet to feed the chicks. Coming from a city-raised young master background like his, he probably rarely saw chicks and found them novel.

“Let’s go.” Xu Nanxiao stood behind him and said.

“Yeah.” Ying Yusheng put down the small basin, looked at him, and asked with a smile, “Is everything handled?”

Xu Nanxiao suddenly felt a bit embarrassed. His cheeks flushed slightly, he rubbed his nose, and responded in a low voice: “Yeah.”

Ying Yusheng then understood what he hadn’t spoken out loud.

The two of them walked shoulder to shoulder toward the spot where Ying Yusheng parked his car. It had already cooled down by dusk, and Xu Nanxiao hadn’t checked the weather forecast, wearing only a thin jacket.

A cold wind swept past. With his hands tucked in his pockets, he curled his entire body up and muttered, “So cold.”

Ying Yusheng smiled and said, “Reach out your hand, I’ll warm it up for you.”

Xu Nanxiao gave him a blank look and retorted sharply, “Cut the crap, your body runs cold, who’s warming who?”

Having been rejected by Xu Nanxiao, Ying Yusheng wasn’t discouraged. He thought for a moment and said again, “No way, you can put your hand in my pocket, it’s already been warmed up by me.”

Xu Nanxiao ignored him and just walked forward with his head down.

Just when Ying Yusheng thought he wouldn’t get another response from Xu Nanxiao, a hand suddenly reached underneath the hood of his down jacket.

Without turning his head, looking at the road ahead, Xu Nanxiao muttered quietly, “This place is still the warmest.”

At noon the next day, Xu Nanxiao slowly opened his eyes, feeling sore all over, but his body was still clean and refreshed.

He touched the bedsheet beside him; it was warm. The sound of pouring water and footsteps came from the living room.

He rubbed his face hard, not expecting that he had slept with Ying Yusheng again. In fact, there was nothing unexpected about it; during this period, Ying Yusheng came to find him at his home right after getting off work, and then stubbornly pestered and clung until he successfully spent the night there.

Xu Nanxiao used to always have regular bed partners, which originally wasn’t a problem, but since the partner was Ying Yusheng, that made it a huge problem.

Xu Nanxiao sometimes couldn’t help thinking whether time could really smooth everything over. Just because he was greedy for the physical pleasure between his legs, he had even selectively blurred out the scumbag things Ying Yusheng had done in the past.

“Awake?” Ying Yusheng interrupted his thoughts, walked into the room, and handed him a cup of hot milk. Then he sat down on the edge of the bed and asked with a smile, “What do you want to eat for lunch? I’ll go make it for you.”

You have to admit, Ying Yusheng was fairly competent as a massage partner. Good techniques, attentive before and after, could cook well, and had great techniques…

Forget it. Xu Nanxiao thought, since it’s barely usable anyway, let’s keep him around for now, and take things one step at a time for the rest.

Xu Nanxiao took the milk, took a sip, and just as he was about to name dishes, a burst of urgent knocking suddenly sounded outside the door.

Thinking it was property management or a delivery person, he pushed Ying Yusheng’s shoulder and told him to open the door. As a result, a single shout from Ye Qiaozi almost made Xu Nanxiao crash straight to the ground.

“Xu Nanxiao, open the door! You’re definitely at home! I heard you moving around!”

“The boss said she’s treating us to her uncle’s restaurant to improve our meals! Hurry up and go, let’s fleece her hard!” Liu Zhuo echoed loudly.

Liang Sihua also knocked twice alongside them, “Nanxiao, hurry up, if we go late there won’t be any seats.”

Xu Nanxiao immediately rushed out and started clearing away Ying Yusheng’s traces in the house. This included the slippers at the entrance, the tableware on the table, and even the toothbrush cup in the bathroom wasn’t spared.

The knocking outside grew increasingly fierce, with the trio questioning what kind of bad things he was doing inside.

Just as he finished tidying up, Ying Yusheng actually walked straight out, intending to open the door. Xu Nanxiao hurriedly pushed him by the back and drove him back into the room.

“Is it really necessary, Nanxiao?” Ying Yusheng said gently, “I’m just visiting your house by coincidence, plus, they’re going to find out sooner or later.”

Xu Nanxiao cut him off directly: “I won’t let them find out, don’t even think about it.”

Ying Yusheng suddenly froze.

Not noticing Ying Yusheng’s subtle reaction, Xu Nanxiao pushed him through the door and didn’t forget to instruct: “If you dare to step out a single step, get lost, and don’t ever think about entering my house again for the rest of your life.”

Then he slammed the door shut heavily.

Soon, the sound of Xu Nanxiao laughing and talking with his friends drifted in from outside the living room. Those lively noises seeped through, making the enclosed silence he had gathered inside the room feel exceptionally heavy.

Ying Yusheng stood rooted to the spot for a moment, lowered his gaze and smiled, then pursed his pale lips, but failed to restore any color to them.

Sitting in Uncle Ye’s restaurant, Xu Nanxiao belatedly realized whether it was really not a good idea to leave Ying Yusheng behind at home without saying a word.

However, the trio all knew about his messy business with Ying Yusheng. If they discovered that the two of them were hooking up again, wouldn’t that cement his image as a brainless simp? How could he survive at the auto repair shop then?

Just as Xu Nanxiao was in a mess, he was suddenly interrupted by Ye Qiaozi: “What were you doing at home just now, why did it take you so long to come and open the door?”

Liu Zhuo joked, “You didn’t hide someone in there, did you?”

If he were a bit younger, Xu Nanxiao would have been startled into stuttering by those words. But now, he just feigned composure to pour water for everyone, whereas Liang Sihua almost spat out a mouthful of water instead.

“Damn, that’s disgusting.” Liu Zhuo jumped up.

“What’s there to hide? I’m not a high school student who isn’t allowed to puppy-love.” Xu Nanxiao finally found an excuse, “I just woke up and was looking for clothes. I couldn’t possibly come to see you guys in a pair of shorts, there are women here too.”

“So lazy, waking up this late.” Ye Qiaozi was successfully fooled.

Taking the opportunity, Xu Nanxiao changed the subject, “Right, where do they make decent windows? My mom’s house has terrible windows, I want to replace them with new ones.”

They all knew about Xu Nanxiao reuniting with his mother, so they chimed in with suggestions over one another. At Liu Zhuo’s recommendation, Xu Nanxiao chose a doors-and-windows shop with a good reputation.

The shop’s efficiency was also high; within a few days, they had it made for Xu Nanxiao. Carrying the window on his back, Xu Nanxiao arrived at his mother’s house. Although his mother said there was no need and it wasn’t cold at all, the fine lines at the corners of her eyes were piled up from smiling.

She was still nervous when talking to Xu Nanxiao, rubbing her hands continuously in front of her apron, as if rubbing away some non-existent dirt.

Xu Nanxiao didn’t mind either; the two of them were never in a relationship of filial piety and maternal warmth anyway. He just couldn’t bear to look at the messy living environment when he came last time, and wanted to seek a clear conscience.

After installing the window, Xu Nanxiao said goodbye to his mother and prepared to leave. When his mother wanted to cook a meal for Xu Nanxiao, he refused that too.

Just as Xu Nanxiao touched the doorknob, the door was pushed open ahead of him, and immediately a gentle voice was heard saying, “Auntie, my mom asked me to bring you some pork.”

She opened the door and, seeming not to expect a man standing inside, froze, staring straight at Xu Nanxiao.

This girl could practically be considered a great beauty, but not in the delicate, internet-celebrity way. Her eyes, nose, and mouth were all round, and her skin was warm and fair, showing a thick, honest, and rustic gentleness.

Therefore, Xu Nanxiao couldn’t help staring a bit longer. It wasn’t until the girl slowly blushed with shyness that he realized he had been a bit intrusive and immediately withdrew his gaze.

“Thank you, Qianqian. Look how your family has always taken such good care of me, I’m even embarrassed. Here, Auntie will let you take some eggs back.” His mother stepped forward to take the plastic bag. Finding that the young man and woman were still motionless, she smiled and said to Tian Qian, “Qianqian, can you still recognize who this is?”

Tian Qian froze, then shook her head blankly.

“This is Nanxiao! Nanxiao is back!”