HL 40

“The pool—I still got it dirty.”

“The pool—I still got it dirty.”

“The pool—I still got it dirty.”

…

Since that day, that sentence had been circling in Xu Nanxiao’s mind, stirring up endless unrest. He was so thoroughly bothered by it that he slammed his forehead hard against the boxing bag, startling a nearby employee.

“Boss, what’s wrong?”

Wasn’t this absurd? He had actually given a guy a hand job—and he’d initiated it.

After he’d calmed down, Xu Nanxiao felt like wringing the water out of his own skull.

“Nothing.” Xu Nanxiao pulled a cigarette from his pocket, his expression dark. “I’m going out for some air.”

Cigarette unlit between his lips, Xu Nanxiao went up to the rooftop, only to find someone already there. Wang Heng was leaning against the railing, smoking and talking on the phone.

“Mom, she’s a nice person, but… I just don’t feel it.”

“I’m not being picky! How am I not trying to find someone? What I want is someone I can talk to and have fun with—not just a suitable marriage prospect.”

“I know how old I am! You don’t have to remind me every day! Yes, I’m almost thirty, not married, no girlfriend—happy now!”

“Fine, fine, I don’t want to fight. Let’s talk when I get home.”

Wang Heng put down his phone, turned around, and came face to face with Xu Nanxiao. Xu Nanxiao really hadn’t meant to eavesdrop on Wang Heng’s call; he was just about to find another spot to smoke when he got caught.

“Boss, you’re here to smoke too?” Wang Heng quickly said.

“Yeah.” Xu Nanxiao had no choice but to walk over.

Wang Heng rubbed the back of his head and gave an embarrassed grin: “Sorry about that, boss. You must have heard something embarrassing.”

“It’s normal. At your age.”

Wang Heng seemed to find a kindred spirit. He said in surprise, “Boss, are your parents pressuring you to get married too?”

At the mention of those two, Xu Nanxiao said curtly, “I don’t have parents.”

“Oh, oh, sorry. My condolences.”

That wasn’t what he meant, but… never mind. Xu Nanxiao couldn’t be bothered to explain.

With the conversation flowing, Wang Heng couldn’t hold back his grievances any longer and complained to Xu Nanxiao: “Boss, honestly, I don’t know what to do either. I’m really lost. Lately I’ve even been thinking—maybe I should just give in to my mom and get married in a hurry. That way I’d escape my family’s endless nagging. I’m going crazy.”

After venting, he let out a long sigh and rested on the railing.

Xu Nanxiao hadn’t planned to comment on someone else’s personal life, but seeing Wang Heng so pathetic inexplicably annoyed him, so he blurted out: “Are you stupid?”

“Huh?”

“You’ve competed before. If you give in, you’ll just get beaten worse. You run from the pain of being pressured to marry, and you’ll end up suffering the pain of lying next to someone you don’t love and having kids with them. The more you try to dodge it, the less you can escape.”

Wang Heng retorted, unconvinced: “Boss, easy for you to say, but everyone has moments when they just want to give in.”

Xu Nanxiao actually understood what Wang Heng meant.

Back when he was facing that beast of a father, he’d also thought about giving in. He was afraid that fighting back would only invite even more brutal beatings—the gap in strength and size between him and his father was so real and so cruel.

But in the end, his pride made him throw that punch, and he’d kept swinging all the way to today.

So Xu Nanxiao would never give in to anyone again.

Whether it was that old beast or this shitty life, he would never back down.

“Feel free to think about it, but you still have to do what you have to do.” Xu Nanxiao exhaled a puff of smoke. “You’re a man, right?”

Wang Heng stared at him blankly.

Then, after a moment, Wang Heng suddenly grinned: “Thank you, boss.”

“What for?” Xu Nanxiao asked, baffled.

Wang Heng scratched his head sheepishly. “Nothing, it’s just… after spending time with you, boss, I feel like you’re really different from the first time we met. You seemed so cold and aloof back then—never came to group dinners, always clinging to Sheng Ge and ignoring us.”

“I don’t cling to him all the time,” Xu Nanxiao muttered quietly.

“But later, boss, you started treating us to meals pretty often. Once we ate, drank, and chatted together, we realized you’re not cold at all—you’re actually a great guy.”

Hearing that made Xu Nanxiao’s face feel warm.

He kept the cigarette in his mouth and didn’t respond. Wang Heng’s words suddenly flashed Ying Yusheng’s face in his mind—this club, these colleagues he could actually talk to, this kind of life where people said he was “a good guy”—ultimately, it was all stuff that guy had forced upon him.

Though the way he’d done it was infuriating, but…

He flicked his ash and snuffed out the rest of that thought in his throat.

A week later, when Wang Heng was reporting to Ying Yusheng, he mentioned this incident as well.

“Hm?”

Ying Yusheng had just hit a hole-in-one at the golf course and was handing out tips to the caddies and staff. Hearing this, he paused in his movements.

“It sounds like…” Ying Yusheng turned to Wang Heng, speaking gently, “you two have gotten closer because of this?”

“Yeah, we even had lunch together yesterday.” Then, realizing something, he cautiously studied Ying Yusheng’s expression and ventured, “Is it… okay for me to be close to him?”

“Of course. It’s not like I want to cut him off from society. I’m relieved to have you all as his friends,” Ying Yusheng said with a smile, adjusting his glasses.

Even so, Wang Heng could tell that Ying Yusheng’s mood had soured.

Wang Heng had figured it out—this man got jealous no matter who got close to Xu Nanxiao. It was like a fox guarding its prey, curling it up in its tail and not letting anyone else touch it.

After a long internal struggle, Wang Heng finally whispered, “Sheng Ge, how long are we going to keep this up? Honestly, I think the boss really cares about you. If you just pursued him normally, you might actually succeed.”

Right now, Xu Nanxiao’s life was almost entirely between home and the club. At home there was Ying Yusheng; at the club, everyone was an informant Ying Yusheng had planted.

Xu Nanxiao was like Truman in The Truman Show—not even allowed the slightest bit of privacy. Although Wang Heng was being paid to go along with it, after watching for so long, he sometimes felt sorry for Xu Nanxiao for having ended up with such a lunatic.

“What’s wrong with it?” Ying Yusheng, however, was unconcerned, casually swinging another stroke as he spoke. “His colleagues, friends, and work—I’ve screened them all for him. They’ll all go along with whatever he wants unconditionally. That’s better than him hitting walls everywhere before. Does the truth really matter so much? Isn’t he happy right now?”

“…”

“If anyone were to wake Nan Xiao from this sweet dream right now, that would be the real cruelty.”

“But…” Wang Heng, clumsy with words, found himself getting tangled up by Ying Yusheng and didn’t know how to argue.

“Speaking of which, Wang Heng.” Ying Yusheng interrupted him, turning around with a gentle smile. “How’s your sister doing studying abroad? Getting into Cambridge is truly impressive—but the tuition there isn’t cheap, is it?”

Wang Heng instantly felt his scalp tighten and tingle, a chill climbing up his spine. He obediently shut his mouth and muttered, “All thanks to Sheng Ge’s support.”

“Mm.” Ying Yusheng’s pretty eyes curved into a smile.

These past few days, Ying Yusheng had been attending academic conferences, so after work, Xu Nanxiao spent more time hanging out with his colleagues.

At dinner, Wang Heng had drunk too much and was again complaining about his mother pushing him into blind dates: “But I don’t like her! I know she’s a good match, and I’d be lucky to get someone like her—but I just don’t like her!”

“Alright, alright,” a female colleague soothed him helplessly. “You can’t rush fate anyway. My cousin’s coming back from Shanghai next month—I’ll introduce you two. Who knows, maybe it’ll work out.”

“Wah, thank you, Sister Qiao. How can there be such a beautiful girl with such a kind heart?”

“Damn, don’t you go getting a crush on me.”

“Why are you so grossed out?!”

Amid the chorus of laughter from his colleagues, Xu Nanxiao watched from the sidelines for a while before suddenly blurting out: “I don’t get it. You guys go on and on about liking this and liking that—what are you even liking?”

Everyone turned to stare at him in shock.

“Boss, have you never liked anyone?”

Xu Nanxiao bit into a beef rib. “No.”

“But I remember you’ve been in a lot of relationships.”

“Those were just hookups. Do they count?”

“Ew,” the female colleague said with disgust. “So shallow.”

Something in Xu Nanxiao’s words must have reminded Wang Heng of one of his exes. He slurred, rattling off cheesy love lines one after another: “Boss, you don’t get it. When you like someone, they’re all you think about. You notice what they like, you want to give them nice things when you find them, and when you see something interesting, you wish they were right there beside you…”

“Sounds to me like you don’t have enough work. Overtime will cure that,” Xu Nanxiao teased.

“Let me finish, boss!”

“I’m not listening.”

Everyone laughed and messed around until the evening wound down past ten o’clock. The place wasn’t far from home, so after saying goodbye to his colleagues, Xu Nanxiao decided to walk back.

With Qixi Festival approaching, the entire commercial street seemed soaked in honey. Red roses spilled to the curbsides, giant heart-shaped balloons stood outside shop entrances, and lanterns hanging from tree branches glowed with brilliant color… even the night breeze stirred with sweetness.

In this cold weather, these couples sure had energy. Xu Nanxiao watched coldly.

Tch, the colder it gets walking, the more I wish Ying Yusheng wasn’t working overtime and could drive to pick me up.

Just then, he happened to pass by a boutique window display. Looking up, he saw the latest season’s menswear on show.

Xu Nanxiao recognized the luxury brand—Ying Yusheng owned a lot of it; it might as well be his wardrobe.

A well-proportioned black mannequin wore a white trench coat. The design was original, the fabric soft, the drape excellent.

Xu Nanxiao couldn’t help thinking that Ying Yusheng would look great in it. Pair it with his khaki spread-collar shirt, and add a tie. Maybe ditch the glasses for contacts—clean and fair-skinned, it would really suit his vibe…

If Ying Yusheng were here, they could go in and try it on.

[Boss, you don’t get it. When you like someone, they’re all you think about. You notice what they like, you want to give them nice things when you find them, and when you see something interesting, you wish they were right there beside you…]

Wang Heng’s words from earlier chose this inopportune moment to surface in his mind. Xu Nanxiao’s smile froze on his face.

When he got home and tossed the shopping bag on the coffee table, Xu Nanxiao’s mood was undeniably complicated.

He’d bought it anyway.

Not for a holiday or a birthday—wouldn’t it be weird to give a gift to another man? No, actually it would be weird even if it were a holiday or birthday. When was the last time he’d given a gift to a man?

What would he even say?

[Hey, this is for you.]

[You look pitiful with so few clothes—here’s something for you.]

[I have too much money and nowhere to spend it, so I got you this.]

“…” How stupid.

Xu Nanxiao’s head ached the more he thought about it. He threw himself heavily onto the sofa. He’d meant to just take a quick nap before washing up, but having drunk too much, he dozed off and fell asleep.

When he woke up, he noticed someone beside him.

“You’re back?” Xu Nanxiao rubbed his eyes, propping himself up, and a blanket slipped off his shoulder. Ying Yusheng must have covered him so he wouldn’t catch cold.

Turning his head, he saw Ying Yusheng studying the new white trench coat he’d just bought.

“Did you buy this?” Ying Yusheng held the hanger, looking it over from different angles, then smiled. “It doesn’t really suit you.”

“…How doesn’t it suit me?”

“I wear this style more often. On you, it would…”

Xu Nanxiao’s stubborn streak flared up immediately. He snatched the coat from Ying Yusheng’s hand and put it on.

Ying Yusheng watched and couldn’t help letting out a soft laugh.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean—it’s just that it looks a little…”

Of course Xu Nanxiao’s face could pull off anything and still not look bad, but there was a strained, pretentious feel to it.

Ying Yusheng’s laugh made Xu Nanxiao’s face hot. He snapped, “What are you laughing at? Try it on yourself if you dare. I bet you won’t look better than me.”

“Nan Xiao, clothes aren’t just about the face—style matters too,” Ying Yusheng said as he put on the trench coat and turned around. “You have strong, striking features. Clothes that are too plain don’t suit you.”

The coat really did look perfect on Ying Yusheng—even better than Xu Nanxiao had imagined.

The white trench coat seemed soaked in moonlight on him, like fresh snow in early winter. Beneath it peeked a light gray cashmere sweater collar and the impeccable tip of a dress shirt—every detail quietly exuding refinement.

“See? It suits me better.”

“Then it’s yours,” Xu Nanxiao cut him off abruptly.

“But you haven’t worn it even once,” Ying Yusheng said, showing a rare look of bewilderment.

“I don’t look good in it anyway. I don’t want it anymore—it’s yours.” With that, Xu Nanxiao lay back down on the sofa and pulled the blanket over himself.

By now, even the slowest person would have understood what was going on.

Ying Yusheng paused, a slow smile spreading at the corners of his mouth.

He sat down by Xu Nanxiao’s legs, leaned over him, wrapped his arms around him through the blanket, and buried his face in the crook of Xu Nanxiao’s neck.

“Thank you, Nan Xiao. I’m so happy.” Ying Yusheng’s voice was soft as he nuzzled his cheek against Xu Nanxiao’s shoulder. “I was really busy today, but for some reason, I’m not tired at all now.”

Xu Nanxiao didn’t reply, but from Ying Yusheng’s angle, he could see the tips of his ears turning red.