SATURDAY 91

I had a nightmare. I don’t remember it well, but I saw scattered glimpses of a crematorium. After blankly looking around the crematorium, I suddenly snapped to my senses to find myself lying in a cramped space, blocked off on all sides. Soon, that space rattled and moved.

The sound of a button being pressed echoed with strange clarity, and the moment I felt a massive wave of heat from the outside, my eyes snapped open.

Simultaneously, I realized I hadn’t been sleeping. I was standing in the middle of the living room. One foot was stopped awkwardly in front of the sofa, while the other was planted on the floor. It was as if I had been about to sit on the sofa before me and suddenly froze.

“….”

As I stood up straight, a momentary confusion washed over my head. So, I… was definitely sleeping. I remember waking up briefly to see Mr. Taeseon off. But when I opened my eyes, I was standing in front of the sofa.

Why?

Had I developed sleepwalking without knowing it?

Come to think of it, a few days ago, too….

“Meow-meow-meow-meow-meow!”

Startled by the sharp cry, I looked back. Lili, who had been somewhere, came scurrying down the hallway, screaming at the top of her lungs, and circled around my feet.

“Lili?”

“Screeeech!”

Lili cried in a high pitch and scratched at my pants. When I quickly leaned down to pick her up, Lili pressed her paw pads against my face and made strange noises like ack, urgh, kyark, ta-kyah-kyah.

“What’s wrong?”

“Mrow-wow-wow.”

I didn’t know the reason, but Lili seemed extremely flustered and shocked. Or, she looked as if she were worried about me.

Only after a long time of soothing did Lili regain her composure, and she nudged me toward the sofa with her front paw.

“Ah, I get it….”

As I went to the sofa and flopped down, I felt a hard sensation against my waist. Tilting my head, I looked down to find my phone precariously wedged between the sofa back and the cushion.

The last time I saw my phone was when I put it on the charger. Why it was rolling around here… with an utterly incomprehensible feeling, I turned on the screen and almost grabbed a handful of Lili’s fur.

Lili stared at my phone along with me with a sharp gaze. The time displayed on the phone was 2:00 PM, and the remaining battery was 70%.

I had definitely left it on the charger in the second-floor bedroom. Feeling a strange chill, I opened my call log. …Fortunately, the records ended yesterday evening, with the call to Mr. Taeseon as the last one.

As I let out a sigh, Lili suddenly stretched out her front paw and pressed down on the screen. It happened before I could even stop her. The screen immediately switched to an outgoing call, and I jerked the phone away in surprise. A call was being made to Mr. Taeseon.

I quickly pressed the end button. When Mr. Taeseon is at the company, I tend to avoid calling him if possible. I know he’s busy, and he usually calls me first when he has a spare moment.

“Lili, why did you do that?”

As if she had aimed for it, Mr. Taeseon’s number… Well, there was hardly anyone else in my call log besides Mr. Taeseon anyway.

“Yark.”

“You shouldn’t do that. From now on, you’re banned from touching the phone.”

I was scolding Lili in my own way when the phone vibrated. Sure enough, it was Mr. Taeseon. Since I had placed a call I never usually make, it was only natural for him to be worried or surprised. I quickly pressed the answer button.

“Ah, hello.”

— Inyoung? Did something happen?

As expected, his voice was full of concern. I awkwardly laughed while gently scratching Lili’s head.

“No, it’s nothing. I was looking at my phone and Lili pressed the screen….”

Then, from across the line, Mr. Taeseon let out a small chuckle, saying, “You gave me a start.”

“You aren’t busy, are you…? You should hang up quickly.”

— It’s okay, the meeting just ended. But really, nothing happened, right?

“What… could happen.”

I tried to answer nonchalantly, but my words stopped in spite of myself. I woke up and it was 2:00 PM, I was standing in front of the sofa on the first floor, and my phone was sprawled on the couch. Was this something worth mentioning, or not? My memory had vanished….

— …Something must have happened. What is it? It’s okay even if it’s something trivial, so tell me.

I blinked for a moment. Mr. Taeseon’s attitude was somehow strange. It was as if he were certain… as if he knew something would happen to me.

Come to think of it, a few days ago, I had spent an entire day sleeping. Even then, Mr. Taeseon seemed to know something, but he didn’t specifically ask. And today, too. I hesitated before speaking.

“Um, Mr. Taeseon, I… this might sound a bit extreme, but I think I’ve developed sleepwalking. Did you… know about it?”

— Sleepwalking? Hmm…. Well, I wonder if I should call it sleepwalking.

He definitely seemed to know something. Feeling inexplicably anxious, I hugged Lili tightly. I was afraid of what words would come out of Mr. Taeseon’s mouth.

“Did I, well, do any strange behaviors…?”

My heart grew anxious. To be honest, I said I was much better now, but it was true that anxiety would rise whenever Mr. Taeseon looked uncomfortable or awkward.

From the moment I learned a side of Mr. Taeseon I hadn’t known. After realizing that he could get angry with me… this was now an anxiety and a fear that would follow me for a lifetime.

— Well, not exactly “strange behaviors.” Oh, Inyoung, by any chance….

“Yes?”

Whether he noticed the trembling in my voice when I asked “Yes?”, Mr. Taeseon hesitated for a moment on the other end of the line. It was only for a split second, but I could tell immediately. However, he continued speaking seemingly naturally.

— By any chance, do you want to try meeting Sihyeon?

“Sihyeon…. You mean Ms. Song Sihyeon?”

It was sudden. All I had done was see her face once at a previous shipboard party and exchange contact information. She had acted slyly, telling me to contact her, but of course, I hadn’t.

Suddenly, the look in Song Sihyeon’s eyes as she watched me back then came to mind. A look as if… she were looking at something pitiful.

At that time, no one else on the ship looked at me that way. Not even Mr. Taeseon. Because it was that kind of time. Everyone was seeing me as Inha.

But there was no reason for Song Sihyeon to look at Inha with such pitiful eyes. She was said to be a longtime friend of Mr. Taeseon, and because she had lived abroad for a long time, she was not acquainted with Inha.

‘Then why that look….’

Belatedly, her gaze came back to me. It was a light so warm and soft that I felt if I had even a modicum of reality-awareness back then, I might have contacted her behind Mr. Taeseon’s back without realizing it. Even though some sympathy was mixed in, it was to the extent that I could have accepted even that positively.

— Yes. Actually, Sihyeon was the only one back then who recognized that you weren’t Yoon Inha.

“….”

In an instant, all idle thoughts vanished and goosebumps broke out across my spine. I could immediately guess the reason why Mr. Taeseon was saying this.

I.

In that moment when I had no memory, I had acted like Inha. Maybe… I had become Inha.

My whole body felt chilly and creepy, as if I had been doused with ice water. The Shaman had clearly said. That I would soon become Inha.

I had heard through Mr. Taeseon and another shaman I met back then that the Shaman wasn’t the “real deal.” However, on one occasion, the Shaman had used a spell to make me look like Inha.

So, it was entirely plausible that I, who had no memory… I, who was definitely sleeping but was standing awkwardly as if to sit on the sofa when I opened my eyes, had become Inha during that time.

That must be why Mr. Taeseon was telling me to meet Song Sihyeon, the only one who had recognized “me” at the time.

— Inyoung?

“…Ah…. Yes.”

— Are you okay?

“I-I’m okay, it’s nothing.”

— …It seems you’ve already mostly guessed, and your thought is right. However… I don’t have any intention of looking into finding another shaman or anything like that yet.

“That, things like that, for me too, a bit…. I don’t really trust them either….”

The words came out in a jumbled stutter. I could see Mr. Taeseon worrying on the other end of the phone. Maybe he was frustrated…. No, this wasn’t the time to be thinking like that.

I truly had no desire to seek out another shaman. I was sick and tired of such occult matters now. However, since it was Mr. Taeseon’s friend, I thought that if I met the person who said she recognized me using whatever method back then, some clue might be found.

“I, I’ll… try contacting Ms. Sihyeon. Don’t, um, worry too much.”

— How can I not worry.

As if he had moved to a quiet place, Mr. Taeseon whispered, lowering his voice.

“You should have told me sooner….”

— I was debating what to do. Until now, that… time seemed short.

He was probably talking about the time Inha spent using my body. I answered “I understand” once more, said I would contact Ms. Sihyeon, and then hung up the phone.

And then I opened the contacts list.

Among the few contacts, I saw the name Song Sihyeon.