SATURDAY 5

The reason I am not treated as a child in this house… is because of the fortune-telling results from the shaman who looks after our family. Shaman Woljeong, who has been with our family since before we were even born. We all simply call her “the shaman.”

Originally, I was a child who should never have been born. When she found out the fetuses in her womb were twins, Mom was full of excitement and joy. But that joy was short-lived. To Mom and Father, who were thinking of two fetal names, the shaman wore a grave expression.

“One of the two children currently in the womb is not a human, but a beast. The soul of a beast stole into the womb and is pretending to be a baby.”

The parents’ shock was to an indescribable degree. They say such cases happen occasionally. To put it simply, a beast—practically the lowliest and dirtiest dregs among the wandering ghosts of the underworld. They say such things luckily enter a human’s womb and are born pretending to be babies.

It was said that a beast-ghost born that way grows up greedily snatching the luck of those around it to make it its own, eventually becoming a criminal and ruining the family.

That was me. Such things are actually relatively common, but it was rare for them to become a big problem. This was because they either died early due to having no destiny, or died without being able to be born. The problem was that there was already a baby inside the womb I stole.

I grew up in Mom’s womb pretending to be a twin. Then, at the time of birth, I should have been stillborn or died shortly after being born. But just how venomous my nature must have been….

I, a beast without a destiny, was a monstrous thing that stole the destiny of Inha, who was born on the same day at the same hour.

Originally, Inha’s destiny was said to be so immense that it could shake the nation. But because I stole that destiny, they say both became ordinary destinies.

Yet, I clung to Inha, who was born with a good destiny, stole Mom’s womb, and even blocked Inha’s path. Even though I was a creature that should never have been born and should have wandered the underworld.

Furthermore, perhaps because I am a beast, unlike Inha, who was gentle, kind, and full of charms since he was young, I was a sensitive child who cried a lot. Since I behaved that way when I should have been living flat on my face, it was only natural for everyone in the house to dislike me.

There weren’t no people who were kind to even someone like me, but…. Come to think of it, I couldn’t see them at the mortuary or the crematorium.

“…Mom.”

“Oh my, Inha, are you awake?”

Mom’s soft way of speaking was still strange. Because Mom had extremely rarely even shown a smile to me. After hesitating, I asked.

“Where did Uncle go? I didn’t see him throughout the funeral….”

“What’s gotten into you, looking for your uncle?”

I flinched. From the moment I collapsed in front of Mr. Taeseon and woke up again, I stopped saying that I was Inyoung. This was because I didn’t want to see my parents’ despairing faces anymore.

However, pretending to be Inha was difficult. Unlike me, Inha was bright, cheerful, didn’t stutter, and became close with anyone easily. It’s a talent I don’t have.

So, I decided to just stay very quiet. As if the death of my half was sad and the aftereffects of the traffic accident were severe.

Whether Inha would actually grieve my death is something I don’t know… but it’s a question I can never ask again.

I, who stole Inha’s destiny and made Inha an ordinary person, have now taken away Inha’s life and even stolen Inha’s body. If anyone found out, they would truly call me a terrifying thief.

Finding Uncle is the same. Inha hated Uncle. Uncle was strangely harsh toward Inha while being kind to me. So, it was natural for Inha, who received the love of the whole family, to hate Uncle.

I quickly changed my words.

“Just, because I didn’t see him. What about the shaman and Professor Jang?”

“The shaman went to the mountains to pray, and Professor Jang has been in the hospital since he collapsed after looking after you ever since you were first brought in.”

“He collapsed?”

Collapsed? I raised my head in surprise.

“Yes. He and the shaman clung to you, saying they were the only ones who could treat you. If not for that, you, Inha, might not have been able to wake up.”

“Ah….”

I woke up after a week. It seems that during that week, the shaman and Professor Jang had sent away all the other medical staff and clung to me.

I might not have been able to wake up. It was ridiculous to feel a chill at those words. Am I even feeling relief, despite having stolen Inha’s body to wake up? I really am….

“I think it’s here.”

Mr. Taeseon’s car, which was going at the very front, entered the entrance of a facility that looked like a park, of a scale neither too large nor too small.

On the sign, “Yeonghwawon” was written in modest lettering. Seeing statues of the Virgin Mary here and there, it seemed to be a Catholic-related facility.

Having been with the shaman since birth, I somehow felt uncomfortable with both Christianity and Catholicism.

Mr. Taeseon isn’t Catholic either. But he had told me that there are many religions in the world and one doesn’t necessarily need to be obsessed only with the religion they believe in. From the moment I heard those words, my aversion to other religions disappeared.

But would my parents actually allow me to be buried in a place like this?

“I think this is a Catholic facility.”

When I spoke tentatively just in case, Father shook his head.

“CEO Lee always hated our family serving the shaman, didn’t he? It seems he wanted to bury Inyoung in a place like this. It can’t be helped.”

For some reason, I had a hunch that if the one being buried were Inha, the reaction would have been different. No, is it just a hunch? It definitely would have been. Naturally, they would have enshrined him at a temple, or at least avoided a place like this. The shaman would have opposed it, too.

When we parked the car and got out, a wide woodland burial forest spread out, and beyond it, the deep blue East Sea was visible. Perhaps because it was right after the rain, both the sky and the sea were blue enough to make my eyes sting.

Mr. Taeseon got out of the car that arrived first. It was a slightly late appearance. He still didn’t even give me a glance, and with the waiting staff, the woodland burial procedure began. The spot was a very wide place with the best view of the sea.

I wondered if my body deserved to be buried in such an undeservedly grand place.

My name was carved on the gravestone, just like on the urn. I felt like I was still dreaming. I closed and opened my eyes tightly, but nothing in the surrounding scenery changed.

I stared blankly at Mr. Taeseon. Because he was standing at the very front watching the ceremony, I could only see his back in funeral attire.

I wish it were a dream. I hoped that when I opened my eyes, Mr. Taeseon would be beside me. If I said, “I had a nightmare,” I wanted him to smirk and hug me as he always did, saying, “You’re like a baby.” And I wanted him to comfort me by talking about the upcoming wedding and the honeymoon.

But Mr. Taeseon never once turned to look at me.

On the way back home, raindrops flew again. While I was leaning my head dazed against the window, I suddenly recalled the detectives coming on the day of the funeral.

“Mom, Father. On the day of the funeral… detectives came to see me.”

Then, Mom immediately looked back. It was a face full of worry.

“You don’t need to worry about that matter anymore, Inha. Because we settled everything. It was a ridiculous thing in the first place.”

“The thing about me pushing Inyoung onto the roadway and killing him?”

“What are you saying! Do you think that makes any sense? A kind child like you, really, I’m so appalled….”

“Honey.”

When Father gently restrained her, Mother suppressed her voice which was about to get louder and comforted me once more, saying it was fine.

In truth, Inha pushing me into the road was not a ridiculous thing. Inha was fully capable of that. And for an absurd reason. Because to Inha, I wasn’t a twin brother, or family, or even a person.

The rain was getting thicker.

∞ ∞ ∞

Returning home, I habitually opened my room door and then froze stiffly. The room was already empty. Not just organized, but as if it had been an empty room from the very beginning. If it weren’t for a small stain I made by mistake remaining where the desk used to be, I wouldn’t have even known it was my room.

Mom, who had come up to the second floor with warm tea, hurried toward me.

“What are you looking in here for?”

Saying that, Mom pulled the door shut with a thud from behind. The room that had become empty in just a few days, as if no one had lived there, disappeared from view. Mom said:

“It’s not good to leave a dead person’s things for a long time. After the shaman takes a look at this room, we’re going to redo the wallpaper and flooring and use it as a storage room, so don’t go in and out for no reason. Do you understand?”

My room was the small room right after coming up the second-floor stairs, and Inha’s room was the large room with an attached bathroom further inside. I walked awkwardly with Mom into Inha’s room.

Inha’s room was different from my memory. It seemed the bedding, wallpaper, and a few pieces of furniture had been swapped out entirely. While the atmosphere was completely different from the room Inha used before, it was decorated with Inha’s tastes from one to ten. When I looked back at Mom, she smiled as she placed the teacup on the table.

“It’s bothersome in many ways, isn’t it? I even tried changing the atmosphere. To keep other thoughts away.”

Did they handle everything during the week I was unconscious and the few days of the funeral?

I slowly scanned the room with my eyes. As always, it was different from my room which had only minimal furniture, and this time it was even more flamboyant. I could see the intention to comfort Inha. I don’t know what kind of comfort it is, though….

“Mom.”

“Yes, my baby.”

Mom cupped my cheeks with both hands and looked up at me. My baby. A title I had never heard before. Miraculously, from that title, I felt that I had completely disappeared.

“…I’m hungry.”

“Really? Shall we eat together with Mom? Go wash up, Mom will have the meal ready.”

Pushing me toward the bathroom, Mom hurried out. I heard the sound of her calling the kitchen manager from downstairs. When I quietly entered the bathroom, it seemed this place had also been newly decorated in the meantime. I’m not sure since it was a place I only ever entered when doing errands for Inha….

I stood in front of the mirror. It was a face full of bruises, but Yoon Inyoung was there. No matter how I looked at it, that was Yoon Inyoung, me.

But maybe it only looked that way to my eyes. Perhaps because I am inside Inha’s body, the person in the mirror looks like “me.”

After looking at the mirror for a long time, I washed up roughly and went down, and a delicious smell reached me. A meal was set at Mom’s and Inha’s places. There is originally no place for me at this table.

In the past we ate together, but after Inha said that he felt like his body became strange if he ate the same food as me in the same place, I ended up eating food prepared differently from what the family ate in my room.

“You’re hungry, right? Try some quickly. Mom made the soup.”

“I will eat well.”

Mom placed a side dish on top of my spoon. Even though I had no appetite, all the food was delicious. It is also different from the taste of the food I had eaten until now.

Probably what came up on my meal tray was made by the manager’s assistant, or was an instant meal. Because if they didn’t differentiate to that extent, Inha’s condition would have kept getting worse.

“By the way, Inha. In a few days, CEO Lee will come to the house.”

I almost dropped my spoon.