ASD 49

That day, Gawon had a meal with Gijun at a fancy restaurant. Gijun turned down all the suggestions from his gym teammates to have an after-party, and instead headed to a quiet restaurant where the two of them could spend some quality time alone. Gijun’s confidence in having reserved a private room in advance for this day was both endearing and a source of pride.

The trophy placed on the table glittered brightly. Gawon kept taking pictures of the trophy until the food was served. He took pictures of the trophy alone, with the bouquet he had gifted, and also standing with Gijun.

Gijun smiled brightly in front of the trophy and bouquet, his still-damp hair giving off the fragrant scent of body wash. At Gawon’s request to strike a cute pose, he made a flower-cup pose with his hands under his chin and gave a playful smile. Gawon liked that photo so much that he looked at it over and over, feeling a little emotional.

The two of them took several pictures together as well. Gijun playing around with the trophy, Gijun kissing Gawon on the cheek, Gijun sucking on Gawon’s white cheek like a rice cake, and the mark of Gawon’s teeth that inevitably remained after he bit Gijun’s forehead hard…

“By the way, there’s something I’m curious about.”

Gawon asked as he put a piece of steak that Gijun had cut for him into his mouth.

“The commentators said earlier. Your, what was it… fighting style? They said it was different from usual. Why was that?”

“Ah… that.”

Gijun, who had been listening intently to Gawon’s question, nodding his head eagerly, suddenly made an awkward expression.

“In case you got scared…”

“…Because of what?”

“Originally, there’s stand-up, there’s grappling, and there’s ground, so there are various fighting styles, and there are also various ways to win. I’m a stand-up striker, so I usually get a KO victory with strikes…”

Gijun, who was rambling on with his explanation, noticed Gawon’s perplexed expression and abruptly cut himself off.

“To put it simply, I’m the type who usually beats people up with fists or kicks to get a KO, but I was worried… that if you saw that, you might be turned off by me… so that’s why.”

It was absurd. Gawon stared at Gijun with his mouth half-open. So that’s why he had been choking and twisting arms today, to make his opponents surrender on their own.

“Even so, a fighting style isn’t something you can change in an instant.”

“Oh… as expected, my smart baby, you’re sharp.”

“What would you have done if you lost or got hurt?”

“It’s okay. I’m good at everything.”

Gijun puffed out his chest and tapped it proudly, which was so annoying that I pinched his nose with my fingers. His handsomely high nose bridge caught, he whined, “Ayaya,” playing up the pain.

“From now on, don’t worry about things like that and just fight in your own style. I’m okay with it.”

“Yeees. I get it, so please… let go of this…”

His nasal voice was so funny that I let go of his nose. …But now that I think about it, wait a minute.

“But then what about the last one? That… fighter Gwak Ji-un? Why did you beat him up like that? Hitting him with your elbows and kicking him…”

“…I just wanted to win against that bastard in my own style.”

His confident voice suddenly became a little smaller. Gawon narrowed his eyes and looked at Gijun, who was subtly avoiding his gaze.

“Don’t tell me, it’s because of that bouquet incident earlier…”

“Wow. The food here is really delicious. Isn’t it, Gawon?”

Gijun was so annoying, trying to awkwardly change the subject by feigning ignorance, that I pinched his nose with my fingers again and shook it. Gijun, who was about to put a piece of meat in his mouth, whined, “Aaaah,” playing up the pain. Really. In the end, a laugh burst out.

It was an affectionate and enjoyable time. The pleasant atmosphere continued until they finished their meal and headed home. Gijun, as always, walked Gawon to his front door.

The desire to stay together through the night and into the dawn was desperate, but now it was Gawon’s turn to gather his thoughts and focus. With an important exam remaining, they both decided to wrap up their lingering feelings here.

Under a worn-out streetlight, Gijun hugged Gawon’s body tightly.

“Gawon.”

“Yeah.”

“Thank you for coming today. Winning was all thanks to you too. Just thinking that you were watching me made me happy and joyful throughout the whole match.”

A low voice that descended like a whisper. Gawon lifted his head from within the embrace and looked at Gijun’s face. Then, he reached out his hand and gently stroked Gijun’s face.

“…I’m the one who’s thankful. For keeping your promise.”

This boy who had returned without a single scratch was admirable and so precious. Since this boy’s dream is what it is, I would probably have to spend countless hours in the future worrying about Gijun’s well-being.

Still, Gawon decided to trust Gijun, just like he did today. Because today, in Gawon’s eyes, Gijun was cooler and stronger than any champion. Because this boy would keep that promise in the future too.

“Thank you for inviting me too. It was nice to be able to see you like that. Really, it was so nice.”

He was sincere. Because he knew how much Gijun loved the sport, today had a deep meaning. He was happy to be able to dream together the dream Gijun had cherished since he was young. He was so happy it was bewildering, how they had seeped into each other’s lives and taken deep root like this.

And so, I savored a midday of your shining youth. We shared precious memories that could not be exchanged for anything else and planted them in our hearts, one by one.

It was a few days before the college entrance exam. Wanting to maintain my spurt until the very end, I finished studying thoroughly and came out to find Gijun waiting in front of the school.

The biting wind, which had grown considerably colder at night, mercilessly dug into my clothes. But it was definitely less cold than the year before last, when I wore an old padded jacket and coat with all the stuffing dead.

The padded jacket Gijun had bought me as a gift last winter was warmer than the cotton blanket at home. As if that wasn’t enough, today he bought me a muffler as a gift to cheer me on for the exam and wrapped it around my neck. Gawon let out a gasp of admiration as he looked at the beige muffler with a check pattern woven into it.

“It’s really warm. It’s so pretty.”

“You like it? That’s a relief. Don’t go around with your neck exposed, you’ll catch a cold.”

“Okay. I won’t.”

Wanting to walk side by side for the first time in a while, Gawon walked home with Gijun, wearing the scarf. Gijun said he was going to sleep at his father’s hospital room today.

“It must be uncomfortable to sleep in a hospital room. Will you be okay?”

“Ah, the hospital room there is big and has a bed for guardians, so… Manager Hwang often sleeps there too.”

“Ah.”

Gawon nodded his head. The cold winter air brushed against the two boys’ faces with a renewed sense of reality.

It had been almost a year since Gijun’s father had collapsed. And yet, this boy had never once shown any sign of hardship in front of me. Even though it would have been perfectly fine for him to complain, whine, and lean on me.

Come to think of it, Gijun visited the hospital once every two or three days, but he had never once taken me anywhere near there. Also, even though I had been dating this boy for nearly two years, I had only met Manager Hwang a few times, and I had never met the people he called ‘uncles’—that is, the organization’s people.

Although Gijun didn’t show it, Gawon could feel it. That he was being meticulously careful, worried that I might feel uncomfortable. His boyfriend, who only showed him his playfully goofy side, was, in fact, a more mature boy than anyone else. To the point that I, watching from the side, felt unnecessarily sorry and anxious for him.

“Are you hungry? I’ll make you ramen, so eat quickly before you go.”

“I’d love that. I’ll make it. My baby worked so hard studying, so I’ll make an amazing…”

They were approaching the alley where Gawon’s house was located. Gijun stopped talking with a hardened expression. Gawon, who turned his head with a puzzled face, also widened his eyes.

“Hey. Hey! Get your ass out here right now?! You ungrateful bitch!”

Bang, bang, bang! A middle-aged man, who was clearly drunk at a glance, was shouting and pounding on the door of Gawon’s house. Even though it was loud enough to be heard from the end of the alley, no household came out to see. That was how much of a daily occurrence such disturbances were in this neighborhood.

Gawon quickened his pace and examined the man with trembling eyes. Seeing that he hadn’t come in a group, it didn’t seem to be the debt collectors, loan sharks, or thugs who used to visit periodically. Come to think of it, there had been no news from that side for several months. So I had thought that the debt was being paid off smoothly.

“Come out, I said come out! You damn dog-like! How much money did I pour into you, you ungrateful, worse-than-an-animal…!”

The man, who was pounding on the door, reeking of alcohol to the point of suffocation, was cut off there. Gijun, who grabbed the man by the scruff of his neck, threw him to the ground. “Ugh!” The man, who screamed and was thrown under the streetlight, groaned and mumbled.

“You son of a bitch… what is this… what are you doing… cough.”

“Get lost. Before I call the police.”

Gijun glared at him and spat out in a cold voice. The man, who had fallen next to a smelly garbage bag, heard this and laughed like a madman.

“Police? Poooolice? Hehehe… Hey, you little brat. You said it well, yes. When she was taking my money, she was a bitch who wagged her tail, but now she’s nowhere to be seen! Let’s see if the police come and take me or take that bitch. That swindling bitch.”

The more he listened to the man, the more Gawon’s fists clenched. The tips of his fingers turned white.

It wasn’t the first or second time that a large sum of money had been exchanged between his mother and her clients. But usually, the clients gave money to his mother of their own free will; his mother had never committed fraud. As far as Gawon knew, that was the case. So it wasn’t that this commotion was particularly frightening.

However, he never wanted to show this side of things to Gijun. He had been lucky to hide it until now, but… the bottom that was finally laid completely bare was so embarrassing that his face burned.

“Wait here for a moment.”

Gijun urged Gawon, then grabbed the collar of the man who was about to say more and dragged him away. The man flailed like a scarecrow and was dragged away helplessly. Watching Gijun throw the man down at the end of the alley and the man run away as if fleeing, Gawon lowered his head.

“Where did he get so drunk and come here to make a scene. He should at least have some grace when he’s drunk.”

Gijun, who ran back breathlessly, placed a hand on the shoulder of Gawon, who was standing there blankly.

“Don’t worry about it. Let’s go inside. Okay?”

“…Yeah…”

There was no strength in his voice. He nodded his head a couple of times, then lowered his head again. The sigh that escaped helplessly felt only heavy.

“Look at me, Gawon.”

At that moment, Gijun gently lifted Gawon’s head. The warmth of his warm palm enveloped his cheek. Their gazes locked perfectly.

“Don’t think about anything else. Just think about what you want to achieve. This is an important time.”

“…Yeah.”

“Don’t worry too much, and let’s keep trying to contact your mother. If she doesn’t come back… I’ll ask my uncles to look for her too.”

His serious voice continued.

“So for now, you just think about your future. Got it?”

His strong and upright gaze was giving Gawon strength. Gijun was right. After all the years he had endured, he couldn’t let his concentration falter like this.

Gawon, who blinked his hot eyelids for a moment, nodded his head, saying, “Yeah.” The future with Gijun. For now, he had to move forward looking only at that.