ASD 39

On the way home, Gawon’s shoulders were slumped as he trudged along. It was already past 10 o’clock at night.

“…Ha…”

A deep sigh escaped him. The night air that tickled the tip of his nose felt unusually bitter, unlike other days. It had smelled so sweet when he walked with Gijun.

His shoulders felt heavy. Gawon let his head hang limply. The commotion that had lasted from morning until night was incredibly burdensome. Today felt abnormally long.

The ridiculous things he had endured from Heo Yeonggyu’s group. Waking up to find Gijun there. The sight of Gijun beating Heo Yeonggyu as if he had lost his mind. And then, Gijun’s actions finally stopping at just his small voice.

When he came to his senses, the police had arrived at the school. Heo Yeonggyu’s mother, Heo Yeonggyu’s father’s secretary, and a man who was Gijun’s guardian arrived one after another. Gawon went to the police station with them, and Heo Yeonggyu was transported to the hospital.

As soon as they arrived at the police station, Heo Yeonggyu’s mother began to roll up her sleeves in earnest. Having somehow already obtained the fact that Gijun had been forcibly transferred, she pointed her finger at him and screamed at the top of her lungs.

‘How can you trust a kid like this and let him study in the same classroom as our son! Did you see our son’s face earlier? How he was beaten to a pulp? For violent kids like this, a forced transfer or in-school service isn’t enough. They need to be thrown straight into a juvenile detention center!’

At that, Gawon, though trembling, stepped forward. His voice shook, but he relayed the facts clearly and precisely.

He said that Heo Yeonggyu had been bullying him for a long time, and that on the day of the incident, he had been subjected to severe school violence. He explained that Gijun, who was a close friend of his, had simply seen what was happening and gotten caught up in the fight while trying to stop it.

He also revealed every detail about the time Gijun was unilaterally beaten by the school seniors, and the deal that had been made between Heo Yeonggyu and the seniors. Heo Yeonggyu’s mother jumped up and down, yelling about where an unrelated kid was butting in, but Gawon paid her no mind and steadfastly finished what he had to say.

‘Lawyer. Then what about the damages Yoon Gawon has suffered all this time?’

Gijun, who had been sitting quietly the whole time, suddenly spoke up.

‘Well, that would be a matter to be resolved by first contacting student Yoon Gawon’s parents.’

‘Heo Yeonggyu will have two School Violence Committee hearings, then. As a victim, and as a perpetrator.’

Gijun’s intense gaze turned to Heo Yeonggyu’s side’s lawyer. His eyes, which had scanned him like a snake, then turned to Heo Yeonggyu’s mother. The woman, who was trembling with clenched fists, stood up and shrieked.

‘Is this guy crazy? Hey! You have the nerve to threaten someone after beating a kid up like a gangster!’

‘Hey, now. I’ve been trying to be patient, but your words have been a bit harsh for a while now, haven’t they?’

This time, a displeased voice came from Gijun’s guardian. Seeing the guardian’s massive, tattoo-covered body, Heo Yeonggyu’s mother was momentarily speechless, but she soon recovered her fierce demeanor and began screaming at the top of her lungs.

‘I can’t even tell who the victim and the perpetrator are right now. And frankly, do you have any proof that our son bullied you? Do you have proof, I’m asking!’

‘Yes. I do.’

Amidst the gazes that all fell on him at once, Gawon took out his phone. It was a collection of photos of the numerous acts of bullying and violence Heo Yeonggyu had committed against him over the past year, organized by date. He had gathered them while preparing for a School Violence Committee hearing before, but since the committee itself had been brutally shut down, he never thought he would use this evidence like this.

The expressions of Gijun’s guardian and the accompanying lawyer changed as they closely examined Gawon’s evidence. In the face of irrefutable proof, the tables had clearly turned. Heo Yeonggyu’s mother, who was sitting next to them, turned pale, then her face repeatedly flushed red and purple.

Meanwhile, Assemblyman Heo’s secretary and lawyer spent a long time looking back and forth between Gawon and Gijun, talking in low voices. The secretary from Heo Yeonggyu’s side, having organized their position, spoke first.

‘First of all, since our Assemblyman and Representative Gi are acquaintances, he said they will resolve this at the adult level. We will contact you again once we receive the medical report.’

And with that, Heo Yeonggyu’s mother and lawyer scurried out of the police station as if fleeing. Gawon also left the station, side by side with Gijun.

‘Jun, the Representative is looking for you. We have to go right now.’

The guardian said with a rather dark expression. Gijun lowered his head without a word. Before getting into the car, he briefly looked back at Gawon.

‘Gawon.’

‘…Yeah.’

‘I’ll call you. Don’t worry too much and wait for me.’

Gijun promised in a low voice. The overflowing emotions in their eyes met and intertwined.

Gawon deliberately nodded his head bravely. To Gijun, who seemed unable to take a step away, he told him to get in the car first and then turned away. It seemed like that was the only way the boy would be able to leave.

Upon returning home, the first thing Gawon did was strip off all his clothes and take a shower. Then he swept and wiped the empty house. He also washed all the dishes his mother had used. Even so, time simply wouldn’t pass.

After hesitating for a long while, he finally called Gijun. The fact that Gijun had said his father was strict enough to break his shinbone weighed on his mind. He tried to wait calmly for Gijun’s call, but he couldn’t help but feel increasingly anxious.

He called several times, but Gijun didn’t answer. Gawon, sitting restlessly in the empty house, shot up from his seat.

He retraced his memory and caught a bus. It wasn’t difficult since he had been there before. But when he actually saw Gijun’s house, he hesitated.

The large mansion, shrouded in darkness and lit only by minimal lighting, had a completely different feel from when he had come with Gijun. The strangely palpable sense of pressure seemed to be pushing Gawon away, as if asking what right he had to come this far. Moreover, unlike that time, a couple of men who looked like guards were now standing watch in front of the gate.

‘Who are you? You.’

The men, who asked in a rough tone, were the very image of the types of people Gawon usually feared. His tongue froze and his body shrank back on its own.

Hesitating, Gawon said he was Gijun’s classmate and gave his name. But the man, after a brief exchange on the earpiece in his ear, immediately shook his head.

‘Not right now.’

‘Ah…’

His heart beat with even more anxiety. Being told no made the anxiety even worse. His imagination branched out only in ominous directions. He’s not getting beaten by his father, is he? No way. No way…

‘Th…en can’t I wait in front of the house?’

‘Just go when you’re told to go. It’ll be hard to see him for a while.’

It was a sharp refusal. He could no longer be stubborn in front of them. As he reluctantly turned away, his feet still wouldn’t move easily.

Trudging along, he kept looking down at his phone. In case a call came right now. He wanted to call again, but he also wondered what he would do if Gijun’s phone had been confiscated. After some thought, he decided to wait for Gijun’s call, sending one last message that said, [Call me when you see this.]

Saaaah— The blowing wind rustled the tree branches above his head. Gawon slowly lifted his head. Flower petals, dyed orange by the streetlight, fell like autumn leaves and gently touched his nose and cheek.

A few days ago, when he walked through the park with Gijun, he too had stood in a shower of blossoms falling as beautifully as this. The scene felt so close he could almost touch it.

The petals that had settled on his broad shoulders. The sweet scent carried on the breeze. Under the cherry blossom tree, the boy’s trembling voice as he told him with a serious face that he wanted to kiss him and whisper in his ear…

‘I like you, Gawon.’

He closed his eyes at the profound echo of those words. In the darkness that covered his vision, feeling nothing but the flower-scented wind that tickled his hair and earlobes, Gawon realized. He realized the reason he had been swept away by that wave of immense despair earlier.

‘What are you doing, you fucker? If you’re on your knees, you should be begging your fucking ass off.’

He couldn’t stand it. The fact that the boy who had given him a fresh, flower-scented confession, the only person who had ever become his spring, was the same boy who had unhesitatingly trampled on someone and beaten him to a pulp.

Gijun had seemed impassive even with his hands drenched in blood. The boy, who made Heo Yeonggyu kneel with a cool gaze, acted as if he were all too accustomed to dragging a person down to rock bottom.

That Gijun was so very similar to the image of ‘them’ that Gawon feared. No, perhaps it was more fitting to say he was the very thing itself.

He was incomparable to the school kids who simply threw punches until noses bled and engaged in childish power struggles. The dank, bloody scent wafting from the violence Gijun wielded originated from the place where he was born and raised. There was no way Gawon, who grew up in the same world, could fail to recognize that smell.

This was what he had been afraid of. It was the reason he had pushed away the first spring he had ever met with his own hands. The reason he had painstakingly rejected the heart Gijun offered with a trembling hand was because he was scared of the hurt he would receive later if he gave his heart to Gijun, who belonged to their world.

However.

Gijun probably didn’t want to show that side of himself to him either. No, looking back, Gijun never wanted to reveal his environment to anyone. Yet, the reason he had unabashedly shown his true colors in front of everyone was singular.

Yoon Gawon. It was because of him.

Seeing him crying in a miserable state, Gijun had charged in like a person with no tomorrow. He was the kind of guy who had acted like it was no big deal even when he was unfairly beaten by those guys. The boy who had smiled sheepishly, saying he couldn’t fight anymore for the sake of his dream, had abandoned all those resolutions in an instant.

Just for him alone.

“……”

Do I even have the right to worry about Gijun?

Because I was by his side, Gijun ended up in trouble because of me…

His head dropped heavily. His empty fists, which held nothing, clenched and then went limp. The path back home felt longer and darker than usual.