NANOM Ch 28

Crouched in the darkness, I suddenly lifted my head. The sound of confident, unhesitating footsteps echoed, as always.

By now, I could tell if it was Jihyuk just by the sound of his steps. Hardly anyone came to this house except for delivery people or the housekeeper.

While the housekeeper auntie was here, I stayed locked in my room as if I were dead. After she left, I would look at the clock on the wall. Then, following the schedule Jihyuk had given me, I went to the entrance ahead of time to wait for him. Jihyuk said it wasn’t necessary to go that far, but missing the moment to greet him made me more anxious than waiting ever could.

Jihyuk entered after punching in the code, smiling brightly at the sight of me, naked and wearing a dog collar.

“Have you been waiting long, Teacher?”

“Yeah, yeah…”

His hand, stroking my head as he took off his shoes, was endlessly gentle. His voice, full of concern for my well-being, was just as kind.

“Why are you out here? You could be lying comfortably in bed.”

“…If I don’t come out, I, I might miss you coming…”

“Is that so? So cute. Weren’t you cold?”

“No. I, I wasn’t cold…”

Seeing Jihyuk’s radiant smile, my heart eased. So, I awkwardly tried to lift the corners of my mouth into a smile toward him. Everything was fine. Except for the fact that I’d started stuttering badly at some point. And except for the growing frequency of the suffocating feeling in my chest, my days flowed with an almost serene peace. It was a precious calm I’d gained since deciding to obey Jihyuk absolutely.

Jihyuk didn’t hit me or torment me. Aside from his excessive demands for sex, he treated me with great kindness.

When Jihyuk heard that my mother was showing improvement, he sometimes went to the hospital himself, took pictures of her, and showed them to me. He also shared updates about Jeonghee, who was receiving treatment in a closed ward.

However, he didn’t allow me to have direct contact with my family. Given my history, that was perhaps understandable.

As the days passed, my longing for my mother and Jeonghee grew and grew until it swelled to its limit and hardened into a solid mass in my heart. The feeling of that lump pressing heavily on my chest was sometimes so suffocating and oppressive it was hard to breathe.

But I didn’t pester Jihyuk to let me see my family. As long as they were moving forward with his help, that was enough. I didn’t want to cause any more disturbances or changes between Jihyuk and me. I now knew how much havoc my feeble, powerless flapping could unleash.

After Jihyuk kissed my forehead, I met his eyes awkwardly, then shuffled closer to him on my knees. I unbuckled his belt, unzipped his pants, pulled down his underwear, and took his long, thick penis—still soft but already intimidating—into my mouth without hesitation.

Laughing, Jihyuk patted my cheeks, hollowed out from sucking his penis.

“So cute. Look at how eager you are.”

“Wanted to… suck your dick… fast…”

Barely finishing the sentence, I hurriedly took his penis back into my mouth. The musky scent of a man and the familiar smell of his body wash filled my mouth, finally calming the faint, anxious pounding in my heart. The relief of not missing Jihyuk’s arrival brought me such stability.

Then Jihyuk suddenly spoke.

“Cute is cute, but let me see your chest.”

“Mmph, ugh…?”

Slurp, slurp—I was making greedy noises, sucking his penis, when his sudden command made my heart sink.

“It’s always bruised. You’re not protesting, so why do you keep hurting yourself? Trying to piss me off?”

“N-no, that’s… not it…”

“Whatever, just show me.”

Jihyuk spoke in a displeased tone, pulling me away from him to inspect my chest. A chill ran through me. I wanted to check if there were bruises on my chest, but I didn’t realize I’d pulled his penis out of my mouth.

“Jeonghyun.”

His icy voice cut through. The moment my eyes met Jihyuk’s hardened expression, my stomach jolted as if struck by lightning. I’d nearly made an unforgivable mistake.

“There’s a bruise on your chest, huh?”

“…W-what…?”

“And you spit out the dick you were sucking without permission.”

“S-sorry, sorry… I’ll do it again… I’ll…”

“…”

“Please… don’t punish me…”

Listening to Jihyuk calmly point out my mistakes, I bit my lip, watching his expression. I was terrified he’d say I needed to be punished. The fear, and the thought of how I’d survive another day, overwhelmed me.

I berated myself endlessly. Stupid. So stupid. Why did I do that? Tears welled up at my pathetic mistake. But Jihyuk’s stern expression softened, and he burst into loud laughter, his usual mischievous face returning.

“Haha, so cute. Why are you so scared? Instead of punishment, how about we do something fun?”

“W-what… kind?”

“I was so bored in class today I thought I’d die. You were definitely the best teacher.”

With a playful glint in his eyes, Jihyuk unzipped his backpack and pulled out a thick book. Unsure of what he meant, I blinked silently at him. Jihyuk’s major was business, completely different from what I’d studied. There was nothing I could teach him.

But tucked into the front of the book was something oddly familiar. After racking my fading memories for a few seconds, I realized what it was. It was material I’d used when I tutored Jihyuk.

The edges of the handouts were tattered and worn. And there weren’t just one or two sheets—there were nearly ten sets, each three or four pages long. The Post-it notes I’d carefully written were still attached. Despite the papers being so worn, the Post-its were still there, secured with thin transparent tape.

These were notes I’d written for Jihyuk during our tutoring sessions. After he submitted his homework, I’d grade it and add notes pointing out frequent mistakes or areas for improvement.

Seeing every Post-it meticulously attached to the handouts, I was at a loss for words. Unable to speak, just blinking, Jihyuk chuckled softly.

“It’s been a while, huh?”

“…T-this is…”

“You were so sexy back then, Teacher.”

Jihyuk grinned playfully, his eyes sparkling. He tugged the leash of the collar I was wearing, making the cheap bell jingle. He’d put the bell on a few days ago, saying it made me look cute like a dog.

“Of course, you’re a hundred times cuter and prettier now.”

“Sob, ugh…”

“Back then, every time you taught me, I imagined stuffing my dick in that mouth.”

A low laugh spilled out. Sliding his hands under my arms, Jihyuk easily lifted me and carried me. Afraid of falling, I instinctively clung to his neck like a three-year-old.

Jihyuk gladly carried me, fully clinging to him, and entered his room. The heavy, musky scent of Jihyuk, mixed with a masculine edge, hit me instantly, unlike my room. The smell tightened my lower abdomen reflexively, sharpening my senses.

He set me down in front of his desk and tossed several handouts onto it. Watching the papers scatter lightly, he gave a command in a laughing tone.

“Sit here.”

“Ugh… okay.”

He patted his lap with a tap tap. Usually, sitting on his lap meant taking his penis.

With practiced movements, I pulled down Jihyuk’s pants and underwear slightly, freeing his penis. Reaching for the lube on the desk, I squeezed some translucent gel onto my fingers. Then, sliding my hand back, I pushed my fingers into my hole.

My hole, softened from nightly use, easily took my fingers. After stretching it a few times, I quickly pulled them out, grabbed Jihyuk’s penis, and aligned it with my hole as I bent my knees.

“…Ugh.”

I curled forward with a moan but steadied my breathing and straightened up. Slowly lowering my trembling thighs, I took in his penis. The feeling of the massive thing filling me was both familiar and alien each time.

Satisfied with my swift, precise movements, a pleased laugh echoed behind my neck. Jihyuk hugged me, tracing his hand over my slightly protruding stomach, as if gauging how far his penis reached.

Fingering the faint outline on my abdomen, Jihyuk nibbled my earlobe. The moment his hot, wet breath touched my ear, my hole twitched, tightening around his filled shaft. Seeming to enjoy it, Jihyuk teased me a couple more times with a smile.

“Teacher, remember? I always got problem 5’s applications wrong. Thanks to your attention, I got it right on the college entrance exam.”

“…Ugh, yeah… yeah.”

Peering over my shoulder, Jihyuk suddenly said that. His eyes, glinting with mischief, sparkled, and he made an odd request.

“Teacher, explain it like you did back then.”

“…W-what…?”

“It’ll make me come faster.”

Jihyuk said playfully, almost coyly. But his words were a command disguised as a request. There was no way I could refuse.

My gaze hesitantly dropped to problem 5. Strangely, the words wouldn’t register, so I read it again from the start, then again. But even after four or five tries, I couldn’t decipher the problem.

The wrong answers Jihyuk had chosen back then and my marked correct answers were there, but I couldn’t understand how those conclusions were reached. No matter how many times I read, the words wouldn’t sink in—they just spun around in my head.

Then I heard Jihyuk take a small breath behind me. It was just a simple sound, but the hairs on my bare back stood up. He didn’t urge me, but I felt a sudden rush of anxiety. Desperate to do something, I opened my mouth to read the problem aloud.

“As shown in figure A, cylindrical tanks with base areas of 5S and S, respectively…”

But hearing my voice, I wanted to cover my ears. My trembling voice couldn’t even read the problem properly. I tried to push through, but my voice faded, like a candle snuffed out before it could catch.

Then, with a thud, something thick slammed into my insides.

“Ugh!”

“You need to tell me the answer quick. How can a teacher not even read a problem properly?”

His scolding sounded like a reprimand, but his tone was oddly sweet. Jihyuk, still tracing the outline of his penis on my stomach, grabbed my waist with both hands and thrust again. With a thud, a punishing wave of pleasure shook my entire abdomen.

“Ah! Jihyuk, ugh!”

“Keep reading.”

A curt command came. Enduring Jihyuk’s relentless thrusting, which felt like it would melt my insides, I continued reading the problem in a tearful voice.

“A and B are… c-connected… ugh, sob, ah… filled with a liquid of density p…”

But the problem never reached its end. Each time Jihyuk thrust hard, my trembling voice gave way to moans and screams instead of reading. Instead of calmly solving the problem, raw, desperate cries filled the space.

Jihyuk stood, bending me over the desk. Handing me a pen while my trembling hands shook as if in a seizure, he kept thrusting and whispered in my ear.

“You should take notes too, like you did before.”

“Ah, ah! Jihyuk, ah! Ugh, ah, there, ah! So good… your dick, sob, good, ah…!”

“Fuck… what kind of teacher doesn’t teach and begs for dick instead? So damn filthy.”

Bent over the desk, my body shook endlessly with his forceful thrusts. The bell on my collar jingled loudly in my ears. One hand crumpled the papers I grabbed, while the other clutched the pen Jihyuk gave me. Tears streamed down, soaking the handouts.

But my mouth kept saying it felt good, begging for more. There were no words of protest or refusal. I no longer knew how to say such things. Once a teacher, I was now closer to a complete whore, begging for my former student’s penis.

With merciless thrusts, his thick fingers gripped the back of my neck like a choke.

“You’re mine. Forever… fuck, do nothing else, just stay here with me like this.”

His dark, low voice growled fiercely.

“Smile only in front of me, cry only on my lap.”

With those words, his heat spread across my back. It wasn’t just warm—it was a searing, overwhelming heat. Like spreading flames, Jihyuk’s body enveloped me, plunging so deep it felt like he’d enter me entirely.

Burned by that scorching heat, I wanted to slip into unconsciousness as I always did. But strangely, a question lingered in my chest, round and heavy. The moment I felt it, my chest tightened. I desperately wanted to get rid of the lump clogging my heart.

If I hit it hard, maybe it would break apart. Maybe it would slip down my throat. Shaking like a doll on the desk, I thought with dead eyes.

📖

I wandered endlessly in the pitch-black unconsciousness before opening my eyes.

The city lights pouring through the window brightened my vision. Blinking, I consciously recalled my surroundings. If I didn’t, I felt I’d be consumed by this endless cycle of time and lose myself forever.

It’s a weekday. Earlier, Jihyuk told me to explain a problem, we had sex, I passed out, slept until now, and it’s night.

Recalling that much, I blinked in the darkness. I’d forgotten something important. The unease was unbearable.

What was it? What had I forgotten?

After pondering, I instinctively reached for my chest but stopped, startled. Jihyuk’s body was still pressed against my back. He was asleep, holding me tightly in his arms. If I pounded my chest, he’d wake up.

Still, I wanted to know what this was. Ignoring this feeling felt unbearable. Only after resolving this did I recall the sensation from earlier in the day, like something stuck in my throat. It was the same as what was suffocating me now.

Realizing this, my body automatically sat up, slipping out of Jihyuk’s embrace. It was an irresistible motion, as if possessed.

At that moment, a heavy grip seized my wrist.

“Where are you going?”

His low voice, tinged with sleep, was chilling. My stomach tightened, and my toes curled instinctively.

“T-to… get water…”

“I’ll get it. Lie down.”

“N-no… I just… want to move a bit… I’ll drink and come right back.”

Saying that, I reached out and stroked Jihyuk’s head. A soft chuckle and a languid breath followed.

“Hurry back.”

“Ugh… okay…”

Gurgle—water poured from the purifier. Placing the cup down, I stared blankly at the city lights. Watching the red light blinking at the building’s peak, I inhaled and exhaled.

Like under a trance, I fixed my gaze there for a long time. Blink. Blink. Blink. I stared at the pulsing light without blinking. Suddenly, I feared it might go out forever.

If that light went out and never came back on, what would I do?

Without touching the full cup, I stared gravely out the window before quickly looking away. A baseless anxiety began creeping up from the depths of my being.

There’s nothing to fear. That blinking light is just an aviation beacon, and whether it’s on or off has nothing to do with me…

I knew that logically, but my accelerating heartbeat was uncontrollable. Trying to suppress the pounding in my chest, I took a sip of water.

As the water slid down my throat, a question struck me.

Why was that the answer to that problem?

Finally, I realized the source of the foreign sensation in my throat all day. That was what I’d forgotten. I needed to know the answer to that problem right now.

I had to know it immediately. If I didn’t, it felt like something catastrophic would happen. Just as I’d kept recalling my situation to avoid sinking into endless time, I felt that if I didn’t figure out the answer now, a massive hole would tear through my existence.

Like someone possessed, I stumbled toward Jihyuk’s room—not mine, where he was waiting, but his usual room. I’d never entered it alone before. Yet, my body moved toward it as if drawn by a giant magnet.

I opened the door slowly. Thankfully, it was slightly ajar, making no sound. Like a ghost, I stepped silently inside, using the city lights as illumination to approach Jihyuk’s desk. Without hesitation, I picked up the papers and started reading problem 5.

[As shown in figure A, cylindrical tanks with base areas of 5S and S, respectively…]

Once, twice. I kept reading with my eyes. But as before, the words wouldn’t sink in—they kept bouncing off. It was like a child who couldn’t read holding a book.

Next to it was a Post-it I’d written long ago. The neat handwriting pointed out Jihyuk’s weaknesses and carefully addressed the mistakes he kept making. Clinging to it like a lifeline, I read my old explanations over and over.

But it was no use. Let alone solving problem 5, I couldn’t even read it properly.

“Gasp, sob, ha…”

Without realizing, my ragged breathing clogged my throat. The air I tried to exhale turned toxic, strangling me. Clutching my bare chest in pain, my face contorted. My left arm, gripping the desk, trembled violently.

Suffocating. Suffocating. I can’t breathe.

Obsessively, I clenched my fist and began pounding my chest. Harsh blows rained down on the bruised, unhealing skin. But no matter how hard I hit, the solid lump in my chest wouldn’t break.

At this rate, I’d choke and die.

“No… no…”

My hands trembled with the fear of suffocation. In an instant, panic enveloped me like armor. Trapped in that hard shell, I could only think of breathing. With unfocused eyes, I stumbled straight to the kitchen.

If I could just scrape my chest with something sharp. Yes, then I could pull out this damn lump blocking my throat.

My trembling hands fumbled through the utensils. I picked up a fork that looked sharp and pointed and began scraping the center of my chest. But the blunt prongs only caused a dull ache, not the release I’d hoped for.

This isn’t it. I threw the fork, frantically scratching at the blue bruises. This isn’t it. I needed something sharper. Something to tear my skin and pull out the hardened lump.

My hazy gaze turned to another blade. Yes, if I tore my skin with this and pulled out the lump, I could breathe. I could live. Just a little scrape, a little tear…

“Kim Jeonghyun!”

A low scream roared through the house. In that moment, the darkness around me lifted. Turning my still-darkened gaze, I saw Jihyuk’s face as he ran toward me with heavy steps.

“What the fuck… what are you doing!”

“…Ah.”

A weak sound escaped. Jihyuk’s face, staring up at me, was distorted with an unreal level of agitation.

His expression was twisted, his eyebrows raised, and his eyes glared at me with murderous intensity. I blinked slowly.

I saw a scarred hand thrust forward. But unexpectedly, Jihyuk rushed over, his own hand trembling terribly as he snatched the knife from me and threw it far away.

This was strange. His always masculine, steady hand had never hesitated when acting on me. And the Jihyuk I knew wasn’t someone who trembled.

He was the one who always pushed me into a vast swamp of fear, but oddly, today, he seemed less frightening. Why was that? Was it because Jihyuk’s angry face now felt as unreal as a dream?

Yes, this must be a dream. It had to be a dream. That’s why I was… but why was I so sleepy?

“Snap out of it! Kim Jeonghyun, look at me with your eyes wide open!”

His growling voice struck my ears. My body flailed like a sheet of paper in his strong grip as he shook my arms. Reflexively, I squeezed my eyes shut, curled up, and stammered a plea.

“…S-sorry, so sorry… my chest felt so tight… I couldn’t breathe…”

“Calm down and look at me. Look at me, damn it!”

Why was Jihyuk so angry? If I did something wrong, shouldn’t he slap me? Why wasn’t he hitting me? Or perhaps he’d corner me with that usual smirking face, humiliate me, and punish me with rough sex. But right now, Jihyuk showed no sign of doing any of that.

“Kim Jeonghyun!”

He shouted again in a terrifying voice. His trembling hand pressed against my chest. The forceful pressure was painful and frightening.

Only then did I notice a flash of red in my flickering vision. It took my dulled mind far too long to realize that the blood soaking Jihyuk’s palm was mine.

It stung. It hurt.

The realization hit me late, scolding me harshly. The pain was intense, like oil poured on my nerves and set ablaze.

Staring at my torn, blood-soaked chest, I could no longer lift my heavy, blinking eyelids.

At that moment, my spinning vision went black with a thud. My consciousness, flickering precariously like an aviation beacon, faded completely.

📖

I dreamed of endless, relentless rain.

Under a suffocatingly gray sky, water poured down ceaselessly. Unable to escape the deluge, as if a hole had been punched in the heavens, I stood in the dream, helplessly drenched.

Despite my living, pulsing heart, my small body was frozen like a corpse. The rain kept chilling my body, over and over. My hot breath grew shorter and shorter in the downpour.

Blinking aimlessly as the stinging rain lashed my face, I couldn’t ask the sky why it was raining so cruelly on me, with no escape. Yet, strangely, I couldn’t stop staring blankly at the heavens.

In the dream, I wanted to ask the pouring rain why it had to be me.

📖

“…”

At that moment, my rough eyelids opened.

Even after opening my eyes, it took dozens of seconds to grasp my situation. I was lying in Jihyuk’s house, on my bed. But what I saw was clearly different from usual.

Following the IV drip and tubing hanging from the ceiling, I realized it was connected to my hand. The perfectly inserted needle suggested a doctor had been here.

“…Ugh.”

A sharp pain sliced through my chest. Frowning reflexively and looking down, I saw my chest wrapped thickly in bandages and tape.

Fragmented memories slowly pieced together. I woke up in the middle of the night, desperate to solve that problem I couldn’t figure out earlier… and I failed.

My chest felt so tight, suffocating, like I was going to die. I just wanted to scrape it out with something sharp. Then… Jihyuk came running, his face terrifying, and took the knife from me.

And now, beside me, I saw Jihyuk sitting with that same frightening expression.

“…Kim Jeonghyun.”

Strange.

I’d felt it when I saw his trembling hand as I scratched my chest, and now, looking at Jihyuk’s face staring at me, it was the same.

His deep, cold gaze was endlessly stern, unlike usual. The usual mischievous glint was gone. His silent eyes held an emotion I couldn’t decipher, condensed and still.

I was curious about what Jihyuk was thinking, yet afraid to know. Lowering my gaze diagonally to avoid his eyes, a burning thirst nagged at me.

“…Ji, hyuk… cough, ha…”

“Need something? Water?”

Even with his dry, crumbling expression, he responded quickly. I nodded weakly toward his sunken voice.

“Wait.”

Jihyuk brought water and helped me up. It took ages to sit up, my chest burning with tearing pain. He fed water to me, drenched in cold sweat and panting. After I emptied the cold glass, he set it down beside me.

At that moment, I noticed his clenched fist, trembling faintly.

“…Fuck.”

Startled by his chilling curse, I looked up. Jihyuk’s eyes were faintly bloodshot.

He stared at me for a long time without a word. Unable to meet his suffocating gaze, I hung my head.

But even in that brief eye contact, I could vaguely sense it. The arrogance and confidence of someone always in control were natural for Jihyuk. He’d always been that way, never anything else.

Yet, in his eyes now, glaring at me, those things were absent. If I wasn’t mistaken, the oppressive gaze held only anxiety and hatred.

More than the fact that Jihyuk was different, his anger felt more significant. He always treated me based on his mood. Nothing good ever came when Jihyuk was angry.

Why was he so mad? He was the one who always hurt and tormented me. It couldn’t be that he was this angry because I got hurt.

I thought about it briefly but found no answer. Maybe I slept too long? Like before, had I been unconscious for over a day? Did I miss greeting him when he came back, making him angry?

Yes, that must be it. There’s no other reason for him to be this mad while I was asleep.

Reaching that conclusion, I closed my eyes, steadied my breath, and tried to quell the rising anxiety before speaking.

“Ji, hyuk… I’m s-sorry…”

“For what.”

He growled in a fierce voice. Watching his expression nervously, I continued hesitantly.

“…I-I… didn’t hear you come in because I was sleeping… I should’ve g-greeted you, ha… ha… but I couldn’t…”

Even saying that much left me breathless, my chest aching. It felt like someone was rubbing salt into my torn wound. I barely finished, my face contorted.

But Jihyuk’s expression, staring silently, didn’t change. Would he get mad for apologizing only with words? Recalling his scolding voice from some time ago, I hesitated, then moved my aching body. As I tried to get off the bed, Jihyuk’s face twisted.

“Where are you going? Why are you moving?”

“…I-I… have things to d-do… I know I’m late, but…”

“Kim Jeonghyun!”

His enraged shout made my shoulders jump. I started begging.

“S-sorry… I’m sorry for being late…”

“Fuck, what are you even saying right now?”

“I-I should’ve… sucked your dick… when you came in…”

I blurted it out and quickly shut my mouth. I almost made a huge mistake. That kind of phrasing wasn’t what Jihyuk liked.

“N-no, no. Ji, Jihyuk, I… I want your dick…”

“…What?”

His piercing, glaring gaze sharpened further. Unable to meet his fierce eyes, I lowered my head and spoke in a crawling voice.

“Your dick… I w-want to… s-suck it…”

My voice grew smaller, buried in my chest. My heart pounded harder, painfully. Was this wrong too? Did I say it wrong?

But I didn’t know any other way to beg Jihyuk. He’d always taught me to grovel for his presence, to struggle for his body and affection. I was just begging as I always did, but Jihyuk’s expression grew indescribably ferocious.

As if he’d strangle me, he asked.

“Right now… in this situation, you want to suck my dick?”

He let out a hollow laugh, followed by a curse, “Fuck.”

“Do you even know what state you’re in?”

“…”

“You tore your chest to shit to fuck with me, and now what’s this act? Trying to make me feel sorry for you by acting pathetic?”

I just blinked silently. I only did what Jihyuk told me to, as always… Why was he so angry? Not knowing the answer, I could only beg.

“…S-sorry…”

“…”

“…If this isn’t it… I’m sorry… T-tell me… what to do…”

It was practically a plea. Jihyuk, licking the inside of his cheek and looking at the ceiling, seemed exasperated. A short, sighing laugh was followed by a curse.

“Fuck… this is really fucked up.”

Glaring at me sharply, he bit out.

“You held on like an idiot until you ended up like this, not even thinking about your body. Fuck, what’s so important about your family…”

Bloodshot veins stood out in his eyes. He clenched his jaw, swallowing a massive emotion.

“And why? Why try to run away from your family now?”

“…What?”

Blinking in confusion at his unexpected words, I couldn’t understand. What was he talking about? Sudden anxiety made my trembling hand reach for his arm.

“W-what do you mean… run away where…?”

“…”

“Is something w-wrong… with my family…?”

Clinging desperately, I asked. Jihyuk let out a hollow laugh, looking both exasperated and confused. I couldn’t decipher his expression. Just as I was about to ask again, he spoke.

“Then what? Why the fuck did you do that?”

“…”

“If you weren’t trying to die, why did you cut your chest?”

His low shout shaking the room wasn’t scolding me. Jihyuk was genuinely confused. Hearing his voice, I vaguely understood. He thought I was trying to kill myself.

In a small voice, I answered.

“It was… t-tight…”

“…”

“I couldn’t b-breathe… so… I did it…”

“…”

“…I thought if I d-dug a little… it’d be okay… so I did it…”

The silence between us was painfully sharp.

Jihyuk, staring at me, contorted his face. His broad chest heaved, breathing roughly. Standing abruptly, he left the room.

With heavy steps, Jihyuk headed to the kitchen. Holding my breath, I watched through the open door. He yanked open the drawers, pulling out every blade—scissors, knives—and stuffed them into an empty box, sealing it.

“Gasp, sob, ha…”

I couldn’t breathe properly. My chest tightened again, my vision blurring. The torn wound ached as if leaking. I collapsed onto the bed, pulling the blanket over me, leaving only my eyes to watch the kitchen.

After removing all the blades, Jihyuk lifted a kitchen chair high and threw it to the floor with a crash! The chair shattered. His face, unable to contain his anger, was full of confusion.

The remaining chairs were smashed one by one, and the table collapsed. “Fuck,” he cursed between rough breaths. Watching him do something so unlike him from under the blanket, I squeezed my eyes shut and pulled the blanket over my head.

📖

“Teacher.”

“…”

“Jeonghyun.”

“…Huh? Oh…”

Startled by the sound while staring blankly out the window, I turned. Jihyuk, now close, placed his hand naturally on my shoulder, brushing his lips against my earlobe. A ticklish current spread through my body instantly.

“What are you looking at?”

“…J-just… nothing…”

Shrugging and swallowing dryly, I pointed at the view far below the window. The scenery outside was now fully spring.

“The t-trees… the f-flowers… are blooming p-prettily.”

“Yeah.”

Jihyuk’s hand, speaking without much interest, slid to my side. Hugging me tightly from behind, he buried his lips in the back of my neck, murmuring.

“…Pretty.”

His overwhelming body heat and the deep scent piercing my mind. Silently accepting his massive presence, I placed my hand over his, which held my stomach.

Thud, my hollow gaze fell outside again. Down, down.

Since that day, Jihyuk had been strange. The day I scratched my chest because it felt tight, and he smashed the table and chairs. After that, he treated me calmly again, but I could see anxiety building inside him.

His behavior grew more erratic. He was mostly kind, like now, but the sex that pushed me to unconsciousness remained. I still greeted him as always and sometimes ate on his lap.

Sometimes, he acted like a madman. Waking to a suffocating pressure, I’d find Jihyuk’s gaze locking me in. He’d stare motionlessly in the dark. It happened repeatedly.

His outings dwindled. He’d attend lectures and come straight home. His phone rang constantly in my presence, but he ignored all calls when with me. He avoided the social gatherings typical for college students. He was growing more obsessive over me.

📖

“Ah, ha, ugh, mmph…”

Clear saliva overflowed from my slack mouth. Grabbing my flushed face, he licked up my wet chin with his tongue. Tickled, my loosened eyes trembled. A drop of semen, heavy on my eyelashes, fell with a thud.

So lovable. I wanted to devour Kim Jeonghyun whole as he sobbed under me, feeling every sensation I gave. Holding his slender frame, I thrust hard with a thud.

“Ah! Jihyuk, ah, mmph, sob…”

He screamed my name as I slammed in, making the connection wail. Did Kim Jeonghyun even know how much his voice drove my dick wild? Probably not, or he wouldn’t make those sounds.

“Ah, ah! Please… ha…”

“Teacher…”

Fully erect, his penis swung wildly, and a high arc finally spurted from the tip. Saliva dripped from his open mouth again.

Holding his trembling body on my lap, I sucked his nipple hard. Each scrape with my teeth made his hips twitch, his penis leaking endlessly.

“Squirting so easily…”

“Ugh, Jihyuk, w-wait, just a sec, ah, not yet…”

“You love my dick this much. Can you live without my body?”

“Huh?” Laughter mixed with my persistent question. His tear-soaked, shaking head looked impossibly pretty. I couldn’t help kissing his cheek. Kiss, kiss, amidst the shower of kisses, Kim Jeonghyun barely answered.

“No… can’t live…”

“Right?”

A satisfying answer. Like a meticulously crafted work I’d spent months shaping, just looking at him made me smile.

“Can’t live without me, right?”

“Yeah… can’t, mmph, can’t… live…”

“Stick out your tongue.”

Even with dazed eyes and stuttering, he reacted quickly to my short command. His trembling red tongue stuck out obediently. I covered his flesh with my lips, sucking and wrapping my tongue around it.

Slurp, the kiss deepened with a lascivious sound. His chin, cleaned with effort, was dirtied again with saliva. But it didn’t matter—he was lovable. Drooling, squirting, or stuttering like a fool, Kim Jeonghyun was my Kim Jeonghyun.

My hand naturally slid up his flat, lean stomach to his sharp nipples. Twisting the hardened buds, I slowly resumed thrusting.

“Ah, ah… ah…”

His gaze kept drifting upward. I knew a few more pushes would knock him out. I’d fucked his unconscious body plenty of times without hesitation, but lately, I held back. Not being sure he’d wake up unbothered was more fucked up than I’d expected.

Swallowing my reluctance, I slowly pulled out. With a sobbing ah, I held the trembling Kim Jeonghyun, patting him like soothing a baby. His bony back shivered in the afterglow for a long time. “It’s okay, Jeonghyun,” I whispered, stroking his head.

“Let’s wash up. I’ll clean you.”

“…Ugh, okay.”

I soaked his featherlight body in hot water. I used to fill the tub to his shoulders, loving how he’d close his eyes, but with his chest wound still healing, I only filled it halfway.

Even submerged to his navel, he blinked sleepily. Washing his fluid-soaked stomach and lower body, he squirmed, ticklish.