NANOM Ch 22

Just before opening my eyes, a strange sense of déjà vu washed over me. The days spent trapped in Jihyuk’s house, repeatedly raped, felt like a distant memory, as if they had happened ages ago. Yet, at the same time, it was a horrific illusion that I was still unable to leave that house.

As I exhaled, my consciousness slowly returned. The scattered fragments of afterimages began to piece together, like a puzzle.

The truths Jihyuk had told me. The chaos of searching for Jeonghee, meeting loan sharks at the house. Calling people I knew while crying, and eventually crawling back to this house—all of it vividly replayed every time I blinked. Honestly, this might be the real nightmare.

If only I had remained ignorant, as I was a few days ago, letting Jihyuk consume my body. Would that have been better? Even such foolish hypotheticals were a reality I couldn’t afford. I just let out a weak, hollow laugh.

“Are you awake?”

The voice from the doorway was identical to a few days ago. I turned my stiff neck to look at Jihyuk.

With the sound of a button, the blackout curtains that had shrouded the room were drawn back. Artificial lights, twinkling like stars, poured in. I had come here around noon, but it was already deep into the night.

“Eat.”

A curt command was given. Jihyuk brought a bowl of warm porridge. I stared blankly at the tray in his hands, as if I were looking at an alien creature.

Come to think of it, I couldn’t recall the last time I had put something in my mouth. But I had no appetite at all. I shook my head, about to say I was fine, but then hesitated. My situation, completely different from a few days ago, hit me a beat late.

I slowly extended both hands. Taking the tray, I said in a small voice, “…Thank you.”

I desperately wished he would leave, but Jihyuk sat on the edge of the bed. It was the same a few days ago. He always watched me eat, and if I obediently finished the food, he would soften his attitude. But if I threw up or showed any sign of refusal, he would get sulky.

“Don’t want to eat? Then eat my dick instead.”

Letting out a listless sigh, I picked up the spoon. The savory porridge, likely made with sesame, gave off a delicious aroma.

I tried to scoop some porridge with a trembling spoon and bring it to my mouth, but my arm soon dropped. Looking at my quivering arm, I recalled how, earlier, I had been propped up on my arms, bent over, taking his cock from behind.

“Give me the spoon.”

Jihyuk’s irritated voice rang out. I handed him the spoon with my head lowered, and he scooped a spoonful of porridge in front of me. Silently gesturing with his eyes, Jihyuk urged me to open my mouth.

I slowly opened my mouth, and the spoon slid inside. Involuntarily, I grimaced and spat the porridge onto my palm.

“Ah!”

“What’s wrong now?”

“Sorry…. It’s too, too hot….”

The scalding porridge was impossible to swallow. It felt like it would burn the roof of my mouth.

Muttering a small curse, Jihyuk pulled out a few tissues and wiped my palm roughly. He scooped another spoonful of porridge, this time bringing it to his own mouth first. He blew on it several times, an oddly unfamiliar sight.

“Open your mouth again.”

With a dazed expression, I let him feed me the porridge. The Jihyuk who had shoved his cock into my mouth with the force to block my stomach, made me do all sorts of humiliating things on his lap, and raped me until I passed out earlier seemed like an entirely different person. His surreal demeanor left me in a stupor, obediently opening my mouth again and again.

And so, I finished the entire bowl of porridge. This was surely the first time Jihyuk had ever taken care of someone like this. There wasn’t a hint of humor in the way he cooled the porridge to the right temperature, making it impossible to refuse.

Jihyuk set the bowl aside and handed me a glass of water, saying indifferently, “Now say what you want to say.”

“…Huh?”

“Tell me exactly what I need to help you with. So we can make a deal.”

Jihyuk asked as if he already knew what I wanted.

The word “deal” made it easier to speak. I had no idea if my body was worth that much, but if I could secure that money by offering sex, there was nothing I wouldn’t do. No, even the slightest possibility of that outcome meant I had to throw myself into it.

“I…. One hundred million… no, even fifty million… I’d like to borrow it.”

No matter how I thought about it, it was an enormous amount to ask from someone I barely knew. But I was desperate. Shame, useless in my situation, wouldn’t save me or my family. So I forced myself to continue.

“…As you know… I’m in a tight spot. If I don’t pay in a few days… they said they’d sell Jeonghee to… that kind of place. Please, …I know it’s a lot of money, but… just help me this once. I’m not asking for a handout. I’ll pay it back. I’ll definitely pay it back….”

Tears streamed down my reddened eyes. They dripped onto the blanket I clutched tightly.

Wiping my wet cheeks with the back of my hand, I waited for Jihyuk’s response. My hands were visibly trembling. Would he say no? I knew Jihyuk’s family was unimaginably wealthy, but there was no guarantee, no reason, for him to lend me that kind of money.

My heart pounded anxiously. I could almost hear a voice mocking me: Are you insane? Is your body worth that much? Are you even that valuable? The sharp, sneering voice seemed ready to echo.

But the voice from above was far more cheerful than I expected.

“Alright. I’ll give it to you.”

“…What…?”

“I said I’ll give it to you. It’s not like you and I can’t exchange a measly hundred million, right, teacher?”

Startled, I jerked my head up. Jihyuk was smiling with an almost radiant ease.

“I told you earlier, didn’t I? You’re someone who’s earning a hundred million just by getting fucked.”

With a chilling smile, Jihyuk mocked me. My heart started racing for a different reason. I didn’t care how he humiliated me. What mattered now was the hope that I could escape the flames licking at my heels.

But Jihyuk’s next words made my heart sink into despair.

“But, teacher, you’ve betrayed me before, haven’t you?”

A chilling glint flickered in Jihyuk’s bright, smiling eyes.

“You told me to take care, then went behind my back messing around with Jiwon.”

“No, no, that’s not it….”

I clung to him with a desperate voice. It felt like I was being pushed to the edge of a cliff. If not now, I might never get another chance to explain. Stammering, I hurriedly continued.

“That time… my mother’s rehab was urgent, that’s why I did it. The doctor said it was the golden hour… that she might never speak again, so, so that’s why. I was too broke to handle it… and Jiwon offered to help, so I went to Jiwon….”

“Then why.”

Suddenly, Jihyuk’s hand shot out, roughly grabbing my chin and yanking it toward him. I couldn’t breathe properly, staring into his murderous eyes.

“Why didn’t you ask me for help?”

His low, menacing voice choked me. It felt like I was pinned under a giant beast’s paw. My trembling gaze struggled to meet his.

“Did you think I couldn’t help? Why was Jiwon fine, but not me?”

His growling voice demanded an answer. Pressing down on my existence as if to devour me, he continued.

“Was Jiwon that great? Or did you just want to escape me? Why the hell did you run off with Jiwon while I was in the States?”

“…Jihyuk, I….”

“Fuck, thinking about it pisses me off again. Should I just not give it to you? What’s so great about this?”

Unable to contain his anger, Jihyuk let go of my face as if tossing it aside. My heart pounded wildly. I could almost see him throwing a few bills at me and telling me to get lost. His eyes, looking at me, had turned ice-cold. The fear of being abandoned like this was overwhelming.

“The day before yesterday, I said I’d help, and you ditched me. Then you crawl back under my crotch in a day, begging for help?”

Fuck, you’re fucking insane. Muttering to himself in anger, I held my breath. I had to somehow appease Jihyuk and win him over. Reminding him of the past would only put me at a disadvantage. I needed to shift his focus to the present, to me.

But how? No matter how much I bit my lip or gauged his mood, no solution came to mind. Hesitating again and again, I finally opened my mouth.

“…I’m sorry. I….”

“…….”

“…I’ll do better.”

It was a pathetic resolve and persuasion. But the tense atmosphere softened slightly. Jihyuk’s piercing glare began to waver. My feeble, pitiful apology seemed to have softened him somewhat.

“Do better? How are you going to do better?”

Jihyuk let out a scoff, his lips curling into a wide grin.

“You can’t even suck properly. You pass out when I fuck you.”

“…….”

I shut my mouth again. As he said, if I were a whore, I wasn’t exactly one worth selling or praising.

But hadn’t I somewhat matched his tastes, given how endlessly he’d used my body? Thinking that gave me enough courage to endure his mockery in silence. The fact that he wasn’t telling me to leave yet felt like a glimmer of hope, so I anxiously waited for his next words.

Finally, Jihyuk spoke.

“Alright. Since our teacher says he’ll do better, I, the soft-hearted sucker, will trust him one more time.”

Despite the bruises covering half his face, Jihyuk’s smiling face didn’t look terrifying. It was almost unreal, like something out of a TV show or magazine.

Jihyuk continued cheerfully.

“But I’m not giving you all the money at once.”

“…….”

“If our teacher stabs me in the back and runs off again… I’d really want to kill you then.”

His smile, as he looked at me, carried pure sincerity.

“I’ll pay half to those loan shark bastards, and the other half depends on how you do.”

Hearing that, my heart sank with relief. The latter part of his words faded in my mind. All I heard was that he’d pay fifty million to the loan sharks.

The worry, anxiety, and fear that had been eating away at me seemed to slowly ebb out of my body. Without thinking, I grabbed Jihyuk’s hand, looking at his face and desperately thanking him.

“Thank… thank you. Really, thank you. I’ll… I’ll work hard at part-time jobs to pay you back. Even if it’s little by little… I’ll pay it back. Once I finish the semester and get a job… I’ll pay back even more.”

“Part-time jobs?”

Jihyuk tilted his head slightly and laughed. His dark eyes glinted ominously.

“What are you talking about? You’re not leaving this house.”

“…Huh…?”

“You can’t leave here. Not a single step. You’re on a leave of absence anyway, right?”

Jihyuk, speaking kindly, twisted his hand out of my grip. His hand moved to my head. The large, dry hand brushed off my desperate grasp and slowly stroked my hair, as if petting an animal for amusement.

“That’s the condition. Until I get tired of you, you do everything I tell you to. You don’t go anywhere without my permission.”

A gentle warmth spread under the hand softly stroking my hair. The lips kissing my forehead were far hotter than his hand. The scalding heat almost made me shudder.

“W-Wait, what does that mean… are you telling me to live with you?”

“Live with you.”

Jihyuk repeated it expressionlessly, then smirked.

“That’s a nice way to put it. Let’s go with that. Otherwise, it sounds like I’m some crazy bastard locking you up to fuck you.”

Letting out a small laugh, Jihyuk added, “When really, you’re the one who crawled in here to sell yourself.”

I was speechless, my lips trembling. I had expected Jihyuk to keep demanding sex, but I didn’t think he’d strip away even the tiniest bit of freedom. What about my pitiful but necessary daily life?

Even if I worked four or five tutoring jobs to pay off the debt quickly, I still had to take care of my mother myself. And I had to somehow convince Jeonghee to get her out of this dangerous situation safely. Who would take responsibility for the daily necessities I had to handle?

“Wait, wait…. Jihyuk. That’s… I need some time to prepare….”

But as always, Jihyuk gave me no room. Stammering in disbelief as I looked at his face, all I got was a cold response.

“If you don’t like it, quit. I’m done with you crawling in here and acting like a victim.”

“…That’s, that’s not it, I need to work to pay you back, and my mother….”

“Instead.”

With an unlit cigarette in his mouth, Jihyuk looked down at me. The composure of a perfect predator.

“If you leave now, there’s no next chance.”

“…….”

“Whether your sister gets sold off, how you handle hospital bills, whether you have a place to go or not—it’s all out of my hands from then on. So.”

A flick, and the cigarette lit up.

“If you don’t want to stay with me, leave. This is your last chance, teacher.”

My chilled heart plummeted endlessly. Jihyuk was saying this was my only chance to escape him. At first glance, it sounded like that.

But I didn’t need long to realize. He had no intention of letting me go. In this game he’d set up, he already knew every move I could make.

No, the game was designed to flow exactly as he wanted. Because outside this game board, I had nowhere to retreat or advance.

As he said, I didn’t have the ability to pay back a hundred million right now. Even if I worked myself to death tutoring or doing part-time jobs, meeting the demand for fifty million in a few days was impossible.

And I had nowhere to go. The loan sharks who came today would return to my house in a few days. I might be able to hide myself somewhere, but what about my bedridden mother and Jeonghee, whose identity was fully exposed? Every circumstance was screaming at me to submit to Jihyuk.

One more step away from him, and I’d fall. Into a deep, dark valley whose end I couldn’t fathom.

The hand he extended was like a rope to someone barely hanging onto a cliff. A rope I had to grab to survive, regardless of my will.

“…I’ll do it.”

My hoarse voice bid farewell to my personal safety. For the things I had to protect.

“…Whatever you tell me to do… I’ll do it all.”

After speaking, I hung my head. But soon, I looked up at Jihyuk with desperate eyes. The deal wasn’t over. There were still things I had to fight for with everything I had.

“In return… my mother’s hospital bills… I’d like you to lend me that too.”

“I was going to cover that even if you didn’t ask.”

I had steeled myself to say it, but Jihyuk replied in a bored tone. Closing my eyes tightly, I added one more thing.

“And… let me go out once a week.”

A scoffing laugh burst out. Before he could speak, I hurriedly added, “Please… I’m begging you. Let me visit my mother.”

“…….”

“…She’s probably waiting for me. …She might worry if I’m not there. Just one day. …I’ll come back right after her rehab program. Okay? One hour a week…. I mean, three hours including travel…. And… and.”

Tears streamed down, carving paths on my cheeks. I lifted Jihyuk’s hand and pressed my tear-soaked face against the back of it. I didn’t know when he’d pull away, but I had to cling until the end. It was that desperate.

“Jeonghee… protect Jeonghee. Don’t let those people… take her. Don’t let them harm her….”

“…….”

“Please… I’m begging you. I think… I think she’s pregnant.”

My sobbing broke my words, but I had to get this across. Only then could I throw myself into this insane situation without regret. Only then could I endure the hellish time ahead.

“…Don’t let her have the baby. Help her get a safe… abortion. And don’t let those guys… take her. Please… please, I’m begging you.”

My broken pleas were interrupted by Jihyuk’s laughter. His expression, laughing at me, was half disbelief, half amusement.

Laughing for a while, Jihyuk slowly spoke.

“Let you go out once a week, protect your sister who’s racked up a hundred million in debt and ruined the family, and on top of that, abort the baby in her belly.”

“…….”

“Looks like I’m a real fucking pushover in your eyes, huh, teacher?”

“N-No, that’s not it….”

I had no words, even if I had ten mouths. Even to me, asking for an astronomical sum and making so many demands felt excessive. But I had nowhere left to retreat. If I only had one move, I had to bet everything.

“With that pathetic body of yours, why do you have so many demands? What, are you some legendary whore? Didn’t seem like it when I fucked you, so where’s this confidence coming from?”

Jihyuk’s barrage of attacks was painful, humiliating, and wretched. But these were emotions I’d have to discard. Bleeding from every stab, I barely opened my mouth. With genuine desperation, I pleaded.

“Please. Please…. I’ll do everything you say. Everything… I can do anything.”

Jihyuk, sneering at me until the end, took a deep drag of his cigarette. He exhaled smoke and sucked on the filter repeatedly. I waited for his next words in silence as the long cigarette burned down to half. That moment felt like eternity.

Finally, Jihyuk spoke.

“Alright. From now on, the moment you say things like that, you’re out.”

The disbelief was gone from his face. Only amusement remained. Like a victor who’d knocked over all the dirty pieces on the game board, cornering the last one standing.

“No, I can’t, I won’t.”

“…….”

“The moment you say those words, just leave. And handle whatever happens after that yourself.”

“O-Okay, I understand.”

I nodded frantically. Flipping his words around, if I obediently followed him, he’d help with all my problems. Right now, I only heard the part about helping, not the threats.

“Every time I come home, you strip naked and wait for me. Ready to get fucked. Wait at the door, and when I take off my shoes, start sucking me off.”

“Okay, I… understand. …I’ll do that.”

“Even if you’re sleeping or eating, when I want it, you crawl over, suck me hard, and ride me yourself. Act cute while you’re at it. That’s your job from now on.”

“…I understand, I understand.”

It was a wretched command. It was no different from being reduced to a sex object, stripped of all will.

However, my head kept nodding in compliance with his words without any resistance. The last shred of human dignity that had stubbornly clung to me was, at that moment, cast down to the depths.

📖

After finishing his story, Jihyuk left me with the words, “Get some sleep.” Could I really rest? I lay in bed, blinking, waiting for him with a tense heart for a while, but Jihyuk never came back in.

As the tension gradually eased, sleep crept in again. My body, which had been relentlessly overworked, eagerly welcomed the rest he permitted. How much time had passed? A rough warmth surged into my body, which had been drifting in the deep unconsciousness where not even dreams appeared.

“…..!”

I struggled to lift my eyelids. It was as dark as before, when the night view had poured in. Perhaps it was around two or three in the morning, my sluggishly functioning mind concluded, just as the blanket was abruptly pulled off.

“…What…!”

Before I could even muster a voice from my sleep-soaked state, a strong hand yanked down my pants. They were sweatpants I didn’t recall putting on.

My body was folded in half as both ankles were gripped and lifted over my head. Like a scarecrow, my body was easily manipulated, swaying powerlessly under his touch.

“…Ah!”

A cold sensation touched my bare skin, exposed to the air. With a slick sound, a viscous liquid dripped down between my buttocks. The moment I realized what it meant, a thick, hot presence thrust inside me.

“Ah, ah… ugh!”

My half-closed, sleep-heavy eyelids snapped open. My body, swallowed whole in an instant, couldn’t even scream properly.

The hole that had been stretched to its limits all day, whether fortunately or unfortunately, easily took in the intruding member. Yet the sensation, like my pelvis was being split apart, remained. My body, warmed by sleep, writhed in agony on the bed. The hand clutching the sheets trembled violently.

“Ji, Jihyuk, please, please… ugh… ah, no…”

The moment I said that, something struck my mind. His taboo. I couldn’t ruin everything in a sleepy haze. The thought even crossed my mind that Jihyuk might be testing me.

My hand, gripping the sheet as if to tear it, slid forward and reached for the neck of the man violating me. Clinging to Jihyuk’s neck with effort, I squeezed out words through streaming tears.

“It’s… good, ah. Jihyuk, Jihyuk… yeah, it’s good…”

A small laugh spread through the dark air. “Fuck, that’s hot,” Jihyuk muttered softly, slamming his hips down in one swift motion. The pillar driving into me tore through my insides roughly.

“Ah, ugh…! Ah!”

“Feels good, Jeonghyun?”

Jihyuk’s mocking voice came right by my ear. His low, resonant voice pierced through the darkness, clearer than usual. His heated, feverish breaths felt damp.

“Uh, ngh… it’s good… good. Feels… good.”

“That’s all you can say?”

“…More, do more, Jihyuk, Jihyuk… make me feel even better.”

I said it in a trembling, tearful voice. My stinging eyes, perhaps swollen from crying, streamed with tears as I forced down the pained breaths rising to my throat.

But Jihyuk, gazing down at me in the pitch-black darkness while holding his hips still, gave no response. The rising anxiety and impatience surpassed the pain and shame. I desperately wanted to find words that would satisfy him.

“…Ji, Jihyuk. …Hurry… do it.”

“It hurts, doesn’t it, teacher?”

His hot touch came closer, gently brushing my eyes.

“It hurts, so what should we do? Should we just stop? You’re in too much pain, teacher.”

“Ah…”

His kind, gentle voice reminded me of the times he used to take me out to eat delicious food. Foolishly, a wave of sorrow surged, but I bit my lip and barely managed to shake my head.

This isn’t that time. There’s no going back.

“No… keep… keep going, Jihyuk…”

“You don’t want to have sex with me right now, do you? Fucking you while you’re sleeping, it’s shitty, right?”

With a smacking sound, he kissed my forehead and asked tenderly. Yet his lower body, still deeply connected, kept moving slowly, creating wet, sticky sounds.

Under Jihyuk’s body, which shook slowly, I wiped my tears with both hands. I shook my head.

“No… it’s so good… keep going. Yeah, ngh… ah…!”

Finally, I could see Jihyuk’s dimples deepen in the darkness. As if he’d been waiting for those words, his slow movements turned into powerful, slapping thrusts. I covered my mouth with both hands to stifle the screams that burst out. Jihyuk grabbed both my wrists and pinned them to the bed.

“Ah! Ah, uh, ngh… ah!”

A loud scream escaped unfiltered. No matter how I tried to keep my face from contorting, my eyes twisted miserably.

Tears kept flowing, soaking the sheet beside my face. As if he would gouge out my insides with his member, Jihyuk thrust deeply and powerfully.

The act, digging into the insides of my thighs until I could barely breathe, only ended when the day grew faintly bright. Jihyuk fell asleep, holding me in his arms.

📖

I slept a death-like sleep. Nothing appeared in the dark dreamscape, which was a relief. I didn’t want to see my reality even in dreams.

There was a scene I longed to see, even in dreams, escaping reality. But strangely, today, that scene felt incomplete. As if a part of it had been cut out.

What I want.

I slowly repeated those words, gazing at the sunlight where dust floated hazily. Strangely, it felt like I had been lying here for a very long time. Months, years, or perhaps my entire life had passed in a single night. I observed it as if it were someone else’s, struggling to find meaning in the time that had passed.

What had I lived for? What am I living for? What do I want now?

For my mother to recover safely through treatment, for Jeonghee to be safe. That’s why I was here with Jihyuk.

If my mother fully recovered after steady treatment, eating, walking, and talking like others. If Jeonghee escaped that vile man and returned to being an ordinary college student. How joyful it would be to see that longed-for scene. I might even cry. A lot.

But then what?

I, as a person, was absent from that family picture, like a cut-out piece. I couldn’t imagine what form I should take.

What am I, after saving my family?

The longing for that scene was clear. Saving them to save myself was what I truly wanted. But defining my existence, not as fuel to be thrown into the fire but just as it is, was difficult. It felt like I’d only remain as ash, stuck to the ground after burning.

But soon, I slowly shook my head.

‘This isn’t the time… to think like that.’

I couldn’t weaken. Existence, ideals, longing—those weren’t things to think about now. Having come this far, I had to discard and keep discarding my sense of self. I had to exist only as a shell, like a robot programmed with a purpose.

Even with that resolve, the gaping hole in my chest, like the empty space in that family picture, felt painfully cold. Even though the midday sunlight was brilliantly streaming through the window.

Then, the mechanical sound of the front door opening echoed.

“…..!”

The contract with Jihyuk, branded like a scar, came to mind before the pain of last night’s ordeal. My heart raced. He had clearly said to be waiting, fully undressed, when he returned. And…

I hurriedly got up, my malfunctioning body scrambling. I fumbled for my pants, then recalled Jihyuk’s words and threw off the t-shirt I was wearing.

With a thud, I tried to get out of bed but slipped and fell. Fortunately, aside from lightly bruising my hip, there was no major injury, but the overworked parts ached terribly. Holding back tears, I tried to stand, but my trembling legs gave out, and I collapsed again. Like a broken scarecrow, my body wouldn’t move as I wanted.

Crawling, I opened the door. Luckily, the room I was in was close to the entrance. When I opened the door, Jihyuk was already standing there, dressed neatly in casual clothes, unlike me, naked and pitifully sprawled on the floor.

“……”

He looked down at me without a word. His eyes and lips held a cruel curiosity, as if anticipating what I’d do next.

Was I too late? My heart sank, but I crawled on my knees to the entrance. The cold marble floor touched my knees.

Various sneakers caught my eye. Jihyuk’s favorite styles were all spotlessly clean. Foolishly, seeing the entrance filled only with his shoes made me realize this was entirely his space.

“…Ji, Jihyuk… you’re back?”

I greeted him hoarsely, inching closer. My stamina was already depleted, and my breaths came heavily.

Exhaling hot breaths, I raised trembling hands to unzip Jihyuk’s pants. As I pulled them down with his underwear to his thighs, his laughter deepened. He silently stroked my head, as if urging me to continue.

His member was already fully erect. Holding the hot flesh with both hands, I opened my mouth wide. I took in the tip of the member that had ravaged me all night.

“Ugh… ngh.”

Breathing heavily through my nose, I slowly moved my head back and forth. The pillar filling my mouth slid between my lips and back to my throat. Each time the familiar nausea rose, I gripped Jihyuk’s thighs tightly and paused. When my breathing steadied, I moved again.

Jihyuk let out a low laugh.

“You’re good at this. You’re really a pro now, huh, teacher?”

Without answering, I moved my head diligently. Despite last night’s relentless acts, a thin, sticky fluid kept pouring out. His stamina was exhausting.

The dry pillar quickly became slick with saliva and precum. Swallowing the liquid pooling in my mouth, I clung to his legs, sucking his member.

The hot pillar twitched and grew larger in my mouth. I swallowed the engorged mass to the back of my throat, then slowly pulled it out, rolling it in my mouth. I repeated the motion mechanically. Then came a dry command to use my tongue more. As I obeyed, a slurping sound accompanied the saliva dripping down my chin.

“Ngh… mm…”

Perhaps because of last night, his release was delayed. No matter how much I sucked, the swollen member only spurted precum, showing no sign of climax.

My jaw ached terribly. My breaths, exhaled through my nose, grew more labored. Hoping for his release, I looked up at Jihyuk with teary eyes while holding his member.

At that moment, Jihyuk’s eyebrows twitched as he looked down at me impassively. He grabbed my hair roughly. At the same time, my face was pulled back, and his member popped out of my mouth.

“…Ugh…”

Staring at Jihyuk in shock, I soon winced and closed my eyes. Hot, sticky liquid splattered across my face.

I couldn’t open my eyes. Semen kept splashing onto my nose, lips, and cheeks. With my eyelids tightly shut, I froze.

Each breath felt like the acrid liquid was entering my nose, so I instinctively opened my mouth. As if waiting, the tip of his still-releasing member rubbed against my lips. The bitter, astringent liquid flowed into my mouth along with the hot flesh.

My mouth filled with bitter saliva. I wanted to spit it out, but I couldn’t. Forcing my throat to move, I swallowed the liquid and tried to wipe the mess off my face. But Jihyuk lightly grabbed my hand.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Chuckling, he rubbed his member all over my face. The semen on my eyes and nose smeared across my skin. The pungent smell of a man overwhelmed me, making it hard to breathe.

Unable to resist properly, I panted and sat there like a doll, offering my face. Seeing me endure his actions, Jihyuk let out a satisfied laugh. He smeared the semen across my face, as if washing me with it, and lightly slapped my face with his member, making a slapping sound. It felt almost childishly playful.

Laughing joyfully, Jihyuk finally reached out to wipe my eyes. His hot, dry hand brushed my eyes a few times, and my vision quickly cleared.

“Teacher, you need to clean my dick with your mouth.”

Speaking kindly, Jihyuk pushed his member into my slightly open mouth. With a blank expression, I slowly began sucking the member covered in fluids. It was almost a reflexive reaction, like a child suckling.

Slurping, wet sounds filled the entrance. Only after my jaw ached again did Jihyuk finally pull out. Following his arrogant gesture, I pulled up his pants and underwear and adjusted his clothes.

Jihyuk smiled, eyes crinkling.

“Coming home to you taking care of me. Feels nice.”

His warm hand patted my head. Then, suddenly, Jihyuk’s warm hand gripped my hair tightly. He tilted my head back to make me look up at him.

“But being late is being late. I told you to be out here before I arrived.”

“……”

Jihyuk’s lips smiled, but his eyes held no warmth. His next words made my eyes widen.

“As punishment, you can’t go to the hospital this week.”

My heart sank with a thud. It felt like a spear had pierced it, and a hollow anger surged through the hole.

“That’s not fair! What am I supposed to do!”

I protested desperately in a hoarse voice.

“You should ask me to do things I can actually do! It’s not like I can get a call from you in advance! How can you do this over something like that!”

“Then you should focus on me.”

Jihyuk scolded me lazily, his smile teasing.

“You should be on edge, always wondering when I’ll show up.”

Injustice overflowed. I had agreed to obey him completely, but Jihyuk, demanding the impossible and threatening me with what I needed most, felt like a devil. How was I supposed to know when he’d arrive and greet him?

“How am I supposed to do that? Am I a dog? I’m not a dog, how can I know…!”

“A dog?”

Jihyuk repeated indifferently, smirking. His mischievous smile, out of place, sent chills down my spine.

“That sounds fun.”

“…What?”

“Dogs do that, don’t they? Waiting with their ears perked for their master to come home.”

It made no sense. But Jihyuk smiled wider, as if the idea grew on him.

“Anyway, you broke the promise, teacher. So, no hospital.”

“…Jihyuk, Jihyuk, please.”

Yelling at him would get me nowhere. Realizing this quickly, I clung to his leg desperately.

“Don’t do this. I… I’ll do better. I’ll listen for you every day, I won’t miss it. Please let me go… please?”

“Hmm.”

His snake-like eyes tested me. Facing his piercing gaze, I looked up desperately and grabbed his hand, rubbing my face against its warmth.

“Please… I’ll do better. Please?”

I hoped Jihyuk would change his mind. It was what I had staked everything on yesterday, and even if he didn’t keep his promise, I was the one who needed it most. I wanted to do anything to sway him.

“Fuck, you’re so cute when you act all sweet.”

Laughing aloud, Jihyuk gently stroked my hair and then my semen-dried face. When he playfully tapped my lips with his fingers, I hurriedly opened my mouth to suck them.

Jihyuk’s laughter grew louder. Pulling his fingers out, he bent down and kissed my forehead.

“But a promise is a promise. If I keep letting it slide, you’ll get spoiled.”

In a bright voice, he said.

“Don’t be late next time. No matter what.”

With that, Jihyuk walked past me into the house. The bathroom door closed with a click, and the sound of running water followed.

I sat there, naked, kneeling by the shoe rack. After a long while, I tried to stand, but my numb legs buckled. Crawling back to the bedroom as I had come, I entered. There was a small bathroom attached to the room.

Trembling, I gripped the sink to stand and looked in the mirror. My rough, haggard face was covered in dried, white liquid.

A sob rose in my throat.

“……”

I turned on the water hard, washing my face with shaking hands. Watching the acrid liquid wash away, something kept gnawing at my chest. I missed my mother so much.

📖

Here, the concept of dates and time felt meaningless. I only knew it was morning when the sun rose outside, and night when it darkened.

Since returning to this house, three nights had come and gone. During that time, I had nothing to do but give my body to Jihyuk. Despite worrying about what to do when he went out again, for three days, Jihyuk didn’t leave and just held me.

I endured his near-mad stamina, passing out and waking repeatedly. The moment my consciousness faded into darkness was the only thing I welcomed.

When lucky, I drifted in dreamless unconsciousness. When unlucky, I faced loan sharks in my dreams or relived the moment I slapped Jeonghee.

The most miserable was being with Jihyuk in my dreams. The physical and mental pain was as vivid as reality, but the bigger issue was that such dreams blurred the line between reality and illusion. Sometimes, clinging to Jihyuk’s neck and sobbing, I felt confused. Was this a dream or reality? If a dream, where did it begin?

I’d even wondered if this was all a long nightmare. That when I woke, it’d be the day Taejun hyung asked me to substitute for three weeks, heading to that mansion to teach Jiwon.

But sinking into such delusions wasn’t an option with so much to do. In this situation eating away at my body and mind, I had to stay sharp.

“You ate all your food today? Got something you want?”

Jihyuk’s joking question hit right at my intentions. I had just emptied my bowl at breakfast with him.

My rough mouth rejected any food. My swollen throat screamed with every swallow. But I forced it down. I had to today.

It was the day of a program where I could join my mother’s rehabilitation therapy.

It felt like weeks since I’d been to the hospital. I had resolved to win Jihyuk over from the morning. If I avoided what he disliked and did what he liked, maybe it’d work. A simple conclusion, but it seemed right.

“Uh… the food was tasty.”

Avoiding his piercing gaze, I looked down, fidgeting with my fingers under the table.

I had planned to speak right after eating, but the empty bowl now seemed pathetic. Just finishing my food wasn’t impressive. It felt insufficient.

As I hesitated, Jihyuk stood up. My anxious gaze darted to him. Cold sweat dampened my palms. If he left now, my plan would collapse.

Closing my eyes tightly, I called out to Jihyuk as he was about to leave the dining room.

“…Jihyuk.”

The moment our eyes met as he turned slowly, my legs froze. But I stubbornly pulled out the words I’d rehearsed.