NANOM Ch 35

“This is the end of today’s lecture.”

“Thank you.”

“Thank you!”

The moment the professor finished his greeting, the sounds of people putting away their writing tools and books burst out from all over. Woojae, who had been dozing throughout the class, yawned with a drawn-out ‘Hwaaaah….’ and stretched, causing his pen to clatter to the floor. I picked it up and handed it to him with a light scolding.

“What are you going to do… if you sleep through the whole thing?”

“What am I supposed to do if I’m sleepy? You have to lend me your book tomorrow, okay?”

“I don’t know. I’ll see how, you do.”

“Ah, Kim Jeonghyun!”

I intentionally refused just for fun and chuckled softly. Seeing me looking satisfied after making a small joke, Woojae hit my shoulder as if in disbelief. Regardless, having packed my bag before Woojae, I slowly rose from my seat.

“I’m going to… go now.”

“Hey, at least let’s have lunch… Oh, right, you said you were visiting your mother today, didn’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay. But we can at least walk to the front gate together, right?”

I fell silent at Woojae’s thoughtlessly made suggestion. There was only one reason for my hesitation. Seeing me unable to give an easy answer, Woojae quickly caught on and furrowed his brow slightly.

“That b**t**d is here, isn’t he.”

“…I, I don’t know.”

“Ha, that piece of s**t….”

My body flinched at the sound of Woojae’s grumbling voice. Ever since I had a rough time with Jihyuk in front of the gate last time, Woojae had become extremely sensitive about anything related to Jihyuk, even after our own relationship was restored. In a way, it was only natural, so I couldn’t say anything.

However, one thing I was truly thankful for was the fact that Woojae’s loyalty was no small thing. Even someone as unperceptive as him should have figured out the general nature of my relationship with Jihyuk by now, but he never once pried about it. He didn’t spread rumors around or anything of the sort, either.

“But Jeonghyun. Is that b**t**d really a student at our school?”

Woojae suddenly asked as we walked out of the building in step with each other. I hesitated, then slowly nodded my head.

“He… was.”

“What? What kind of answer is that?”

“It’s true that he… was admitted to our school….”

Ahem, clearing my throat, I added in a small voice.

“He dropped out.”

“…What?”

Woojae even stopped walking and stared at me with a look of shock. Then he put a finger to his temple and spun it around.

“Isn’t that b**t**d a complete psycho? Why? Why the h**l would he drop out? This is the first time in my life I’ve seen a b**t**d drop out of Hankuk University.”

“…….”

I couldn’t bring myself to tell him the truth, so I kept my mouth shut. Seeing me start to walk again without a word, Woojae didn’t ask any more about him.

I parted ways with Woojae before we reached the front gate. As soon as he was a good distance away, I hurriedly took out my phone. As I expected, there were several messages from Jihyuk.

[Teacher]

[When do you finish?]

[I want to see you soon.]

A bitter laugh escaped my lips in disbelief. With a sigh that came out before I knew it, I pressed down firmly on my eyelids.

After that snowy day when Jihyuk had come to find me, Jihyuk, true to his word, had started coming to see me frequently, saying he just ‘wanted to see my face.’ He would usually be standing in front of my house late in the evening, or he would at least call. The frequent messages, too, he never missed a single day.

It was absurd. I had clearly told him that it was a difficult thing for me, but it seemed the leeway I added at the end must have felt like a huge opening to Jihyuk. As if he had been waiting for it, Jihyuk pushed his way into that gap and rushed towards me every single day.

He sends messages saying he misses me, calls two or three times a day to ask if I’ve eaten, and comes to my house or school every few days. It almost looked like the kind of thing that normal, affectionate couples do.

And yet, I myself found it surprising that Jihyuk’s behavior wasn’t as uncomfortable as I thought it would be. It wasn’t like he would show up and force me to do anything or stay for hours. It was just that we would occasionally eat together, and if even that wasn’t possible, he would just glance at my face and leave.

Jihyuk was burrowing into my daily life with such cunning. He was careful not to make me feel uncomfortable, yet he never stopped his assertive actions.

The problem was the increasing frequency. And now, he had even started coming to the front of the school.

When I couldn’t stand it anymore and asked if he had nothing better to do, the reply came back that he was already in and out of his father’s company receiving management training and was so bored he could die.

‘Then, in the middle of all that… busyness, why on earth do you, do you come to see me?’

‘Because I miss you, teacher.’

Jihyuk’s answers were always simple and clear. His expression was as if to ask why I would even ask such a thing. In front of him, I was always at a loss for words. So one day, in a fit of anger, I asked Jihyuk.

‘If you’re going to… come see me this often, why don’t you just go, back to school?’

At that moment, Jihyuk’s face lit up with a grin. As if he had been waiting for those very words.

‘Can I do that?’

‘Why are you… asking for my permission? It’s your education.’

‘Isn’t that obvious? If you say it’s uncomfortable for you, teacher, I have no intention of going.’

In front of Jihyuk, who said it so casually, I was once again at a loss for words. Because I, of all people, had been his tutor, I knew how fiercely Jihyuk had studied to get into this school. Yet, Jihyuk seemed to have no lingering attachment to the school. He even said the reason he quit was because he was afraid I would be uncomfortable.

Considering he was already learning his father’s company’s business, it didn’t seem like his academic background would be that essential anyway. If it had been an important factor for Jihyuk, he wouldn’t have dropped out in the first place, or he would have gone to another school immediately after. I was curious why he would want to attend school if he didn’t necessarily have to.

However, Jihyuk’s answer to that was also overly clear.

‘Because I want to have a college life together with you, teacher.’

Jihyuk’s direct pitches toward me are always straight and intense. So much so that it’s burdensome. I unconsciously ran my tongue over my lips and hurriedly changed the subject.

‘…It’s from the first semester of the first year. Do you think you can start over?’

‘Do you think I can’t? Whose student do you think I am?’

It was a strangely convincing answer. Not because of whose student he was, but because he was Jihyuk. When I first took on Jihyuk as a student and tested him, I had objectively thought he wasn’t quite at the level to apply to Hankuk University. But Jihyuk had pulled it off. Jihyuk was more persistent and outstanding academically than my first impression had suggested, so he would probably find his pace again quickly.

‘Can I really, re-enroll?’

‘…Do as you please. It’s not… something you need to ask me.’

I had cut him off like that just a few days ago, pulling away Jihyuk’s hand as it playfully tickled the back of my hand.
For the topic of re-enrollment to even come out of my mouth, that’s how much it had come to.

As expected, even today I could see the sedan that Jihyuk drives himself parked in front of the gate in the distance. A surge of anger quietly rose in me. I thought that today, I absolutely had to say something firm.

As I got closer, Jihyuk got out of the driver’s seat and smiled dazzlingly. It was a smile that blended in without any sense of disharmony with the cherry blossoms blooming in profusion and fluttering above his head.

“Did you have a good class? For lunch….”

“Jihyuk.”

Cutting off Jihyuk as he was about to say something, I spoke, articulating each word with force.

“Coming to see me… like this every day, it’s burdensome. Please don’t do this.”

“…….”

“And in front of the school… it’s even more uncomfortable.”

The smile that had been curving Jihyuk’s eyes stopped. He silently raised one eyebrow, looking quite displeased.

“That’s harsh.”

His low voice expressed his dissatisfaction.

“I’ve been holding back from wanting to see you since yesterday.”

But that was all. Jihyuk didn’t say anything more. One thing that had definitely changed from before was that he no longer insisted on his own way or tried to force things on me. Except for one thing, my telling him to stop coming.

‘Go out with me.’

Jihyuk’s previous proposition was something so unrealistic that I couldn’t even imagine it. Therefore, I couldn’t give him an answer to it. Jihyuk, too, no longer forced the issue or tried to get a confirmation. However, even though we hadn’t defined it, the things Jihyuk did for me were exactly what lovers do.

To be honest, I didn’t feel a strong aversion to those actions themselves. Except for him coming to the school. The memories I had in front of the school gate were not very pleasant, and I was also somewhat conscious of other people’s eyes. And even setting those reasons aside, if we met like this day and night, it would surely interfere with Jihyuk’s daily life. It wasn’t really my business to worry about, but I couldn’t help but be concerned.

“…I’m going. I already, had lunch.”

“Take the car.”

“It’s okay. I’ll take, the subway.”

I finished my words in a slow but clear tone. At my unusually firm refusal, Jihyuk’s face became completely hard. His gaze, staring at me as if glaring, clearly showed a hint of being hurt.

It’s not like I feel good for refusing so coldly either. The emotion I’m feeling right now is closer to unease. But I had to say it clearly at least once. Otherwise, I felt like I would continue to be dragged along by Jihyuk indefinitely.

“Then….”

Before saying my goodbye, I hesitated for a moment. Just in case Jihyuk might come to my house in the evening today as well. Today was the day I had promised to visit my mother with Jeonghee, and we planned to have dinner together before coming back. So, should I tell him not to come to my house beforehand?

However, a snort escaped me soon after. That was thinking too far ahead. It had only been the day before yesterday that Jihyuk had come to my house in the evening.

Besides, we had parted on such sour terms. No matter how much Jihyuk wanted to see me, his pride wouldn’t let him come looking for me again today. He would probably be out of touch for a while. Making that assumption on my own, I said my farewell to Jihyuk.

“…Take care.”

“…….”

I walked past the still-silent Jihyuk with steady steps. He remained standing right there until I reached the bus stop in front of the main gate.

I got on the bus that arrived soon after, squeezed in among students all wearing backpacks, and grabbed a hand strap. With a hiss, the doors closed, and just before the bus started moving, Jihyuk’s car roughly sped past the front of the bus. His driving was exceptionally reckless today.

He must be really upset. I let out a small sigh inwardly and 괜히 fixed my gaze on the hand strap I was holding.

📖

“Mom. You really worked hard today, too.”

“That’s right. Our mom is the best.”

After wiping the sweat from my mother’s forehead with a handkerchief, I helped her sit down. Just a few weeks ago, it took her more than a minute to sit down, but these days it was around 10 seconds. It was remarkable progress.

She had also gained a lot of weight on her thin frame. Muscle and strength were slowly but surely forming on her once bony frame. I myself was often surprised by the different feel of strength each time I supported my mother’s body.

And I was tearfully grateful. Because it seemed my mother, too, was giving her all to return to us with steady steps.

“Mom. Jeonghee and I will come again next week.”

“Uh-huh. I’ll come tomorrow, too.”

After she was moved to a hospital in Seoul, Jeonghee, not me, became my mother’s primary guardian. It was something Jeonghee volunteered for. She said she wanted to make up for the time she hadn’t been good to our mother.

I was in charge of the major decisions, and a caregiver was also staying with her, so Jeonghee’s main job was to stop by every day to show her face and encourage our mother.

For me, it was something I couldn’t be more grateful for. To graduate early, it wouldn’t be enough to study like crazy every single day. Especially during midterm season like now. Even today, I was planning to eat with Jeonghee and then immediately head back to the library.

After the visit, we went down to the hospital’s basement and each had a bowl of bone broth soup. I told her we could eat outside, but Jeonghee encouraged me, saying I should save even that much time.

“You, too… must be busy, studying. Are you… sure you’re okay?”

“I’m fine. This semester is pretty light. And besides, no matter how busy I get, how could I compare to you, oppa?”

“Thank you. …I’ll help out too, during the vacation.”

“Oppa, you’ve had it hard enough on your own all this time. You don’t need to feel like that in times like this.”

When did she become so mature? I looked at Jeonghee with a pleased smile, then cleared the table and slowly stood up. Jeonghee also drained her water glass and stood up.

We took the elevator back up to the first floor. We walked side by side towards the subway station and parted ways in front of the ticket gate with a wave. Jeonghee’s school and mine were in opposite directions.

[The train for XX, the train for XX is now approaching….]

With a hiss, I boarded the subway as the doors opened. I was lucky enough to get a seat and was about to close my eyes when a chilly feeling made me sit bolt upright. It was because I remembered that I had split my textbook for a subject I absolutely had to study today—half of it was in my bag, and the other half was at home.

‘Ha….’

I felt hopeless. Of all things, the exam scope was awkwardly spread across both books. How could I have made such a ridiculous mistake?

I rubbed my eyes hard with my dry palm, then took out the one half-textbook from my bag. At least if I read this on the way, I could minimize the waste of time. With that thought, I was about to focus on the text that came into view.

But what is this thing that’s bothering me so much?

Although it was a bit of a hassle because I didn’t bring the book, the exam wasn’t tomorrow, and I could just read what I had in my bag on the way, so nothing was terribly wrong. And yet, an inexplicable sense of unease kept bubbling up in my mind.

What could be the reason? I blinked for a while, retracing the day’s events.

And the place where my train of thought finally arrived was, unbelievably, the last image of Jihyuk staring at me silently in front of the school.

‘Haa….’

It was so absurd that a hollow laugh came out. After saying what I rightfully had to say to Jihyuk, why was I the one feeling so uneasy about it in my own mind?

Still, once I acknowledged it, it kept coming back to me uncontrollably. Jihyuk’s face from earlier. The messages he had sent saying he missed me. The expression that had slowly bloomed with delight as soon as our eyes met, and the face that had hardened in an instant when I told him not to come to the front of the school anymore.

Jihyuk’s hardened face was quite intimidating at first glance, but now I felt like I could understand, just a little, the emotions he was truly feeling beyond that expression. Disappointment. Lingering attachment. Things like that.

‘…What do I care? It’s not like I can accept this every single time.’

This isn’t the time to be having these thoughts. I tried to think coldly, forcefully pushing away the idle thoughts, and started to read through the tattered book that I had read dozens of times once more.

Until a year ago, I could clearly feel that my mind had become dull and stiff, so it was a relief that it had returned to how it used to be. It was the result of the hours I had put in every night since being discharged, starting with high school workbooks and diligently working my way up.
I turned the pages, reviewing the parts I had already memorized. But as I turned one page after another, a certain voice kept ringing in my ears.

‘That’s harsh.’

‘I’ve been holding back from wanting to see you since yesterday.’

Haa, in the end, I had no choice but to surrender. I let out a sigh and covered my face with one hand. The emotion that followed was a very subtle one, so threadlike it was hard to gauge, but it was definitely regret.

Maybe I shouldn’t have turned away so coldly.

Since he came all the way to pick me up, maybe I should have at least taken a ride in his car.

Even if I thought that, it was already in the past. And besides, I needed to put a stop to Jihyuk’s behavior at least once. I tried to think that way, erasing the sticky lingering feelings that clung to my heart.

Before I knew it, I was approaching the station where I had to transfer. If I had my book, I could have gone straight to school. With a sense of regret, I forced myself up from my seat and got off the subway. I kept my eyes buried in my book in my spare moments until I reached the subway station completely. Only when I reached the ticket gate did I put the book away and take out my transportation card to tap it.

Fortunately, it was a short distance from the subway station to my house. I hurried my steps, almost running, as I headed forward. Then, I suddenly lifted my head and, without realizing it, slowed my pace. What came into view was the sky, where the sun was just beginning to set. The sky, changing its hues bit by bit before turning orange, was beautiful.

“…Haa….”

However, I urged my briefly stopped feet to move again. I didn’t have the luxury to stand around idly like this, just looking at the sky. A day would come when I could leisurely watch the beautiful sunset to my heart’s content. So until then, if I just, just push myself a little more….

“…Huh?”

My hurried steps came to an abrupt halt. A bewildered sound escaped my mouth on its own.

Under the streetlight in front of my house, Jihyuk was standing blankly. It was the place where he always waited for me. From the snowy day he came to find me until now, Jihyuk would show up unexpectedly and always stand in that spot, waiting for me. He must have come on his motorcycle today, as it was also parked there under the streetlight.

“You’re here?”

Seeing me, he flicked his cigarette away with a thwack and crushed it with his foot. Then he gave a dry smile.

“…Jihyuk.”

I barely managed to open my mouth, my expression stiff.

“Why are you here….”

Honestly, I wasn’t burdened or angry like I was when we met at school earlier. I was just surprised. Because we had parted ways like that, I thought that for today at least, Jihyuk wouldn’t come.

“Just, because I wanted to see your face, teacher.”

“…….”

Jihyuk’s expression as he spoke so plainly was hard to read today. It was even more so because there was no hint of his usual slyness or playfulness.

However, seeing me just standing there silently, Jihyuk let out a short sigh, perhaps thinking that I was angry.

“I know. That I just did something that’s making you uncomfortable again, teacher.”

Jihyuk twisted one corner of his mouth slightly upwards and muttered coldly.

“In your eyes, teacher, I must look like a whiny little brat.”

“…….”

“I know that, too. I know, but….”

His eyes, which had been staring straight at me, crumpled fiercely. With a scrunched face, Jihyuk spat out his words.

“What am I supposed to do when I miss you so much I’m restless and going crazy.”

“…….”

“F**k, even in America I was constantly… felt like I was going to die from missing you, how much do you think I have to hold back even when I’m here….”

Jihyuk, chewing on his words resentfully, couldn’t finish his sentence in the end. Hah, letting out a short sigh, he rubbed one side of his face with his palm. His movement, as always, was slow like a predator’s, but I could clearly tell that he was anxious.

We stood there in silence for a long while. A sweet floral scent wafted in with a sudden gust of spring breeze. I took a deep breath without realizing it. It was the scent of lilacs.

Suddenly, the image of Jihyuk standing under the falling snow and the Jihyuk of now overlapped. Then and now, Jihyuk was anxious in front of me.

I think I can now, little by little, accept that Jihyuk is like this because he likes me. Then why on earth does Jihyuk like me? What is it about me that makes a kid who lived without wanting for anything from anyone lay bare his soul, suffering with longing, in front of me?

Jihyuk, who had been silent for a long while, finally opened his mouth.

“Don’t stay up all night studying just because it’s the exam period. Make sure to sleep, even if it’s just a little.”

“…….”

“…I’ve seen your face, so I’ll be going now.”

Even as he clearly uttered those words, Jihyuk showed no sign of taking his fixed gaze off me. Receiving his stare, which felt like it was constricting me, I simply blinked my eyes.

After looking at me like that for a moment, Jihyuk suddenly reached out his hand and gently stroked my face. It felt like a small electric current sparked everywhere his hand touched. The moment Jihyuk turned to leave, my hand shot out before I even realized it.

Jihyuk looked back at me with a surprised face, at me who had grabbed his wrist from behind. Looking him straight in the eye, I asked him.
“Jihyuk.”

“Yes.”

“You, you….”

Now that I was about to ask the question, it felt excessively cheesy, but today, I really wanted to get it straight.

“…Why… did you want to see me?”

“Because I like you, seonsaengnim.”

Despite my hesitant question, Jihyuk returned an immediate answer. Swallowing my dry saliva, I did not stop there and asked the question I truly wanted to ask.

“Why do you… l…ike me?”

This was probably the question I had wanted to ask him the most for a very long time. I wanted to know why, of all the many people, he had chosen me to confine within his territory from the very beginning, the reason our relationship had been established.

There was a high possibility that a simple answer would come back. Perhaps my body was to his taste. Thinking that far, I quickly erased that answer from my mind. Because ever since we met again a few months ago, Jihyuk, just as he had said, had not laid a single hand on me. Except for light contact, like touching my face or stroking my hair.

Then could it be my face? I had grown up hearing a few times that my face was handsome, but that alone could not be the reason. And there was absolutely no way he would come to my house and wait for hours just to see my face.

As I deleted the potential answers that came to mind one by one, I became even more clueless about his heart. Then, for what reason, exactly.

However, as if to mock my intense, momentary contemplation, Jihyuk gave his answer without any hesitation at all. Like someone who had prepared the answer a long, long time ago.

“Just because.”

“…….”

“Because you’re Kim Jeonghyun, seonsaengnim, that’s why I like you. Do I need any other reason?”

Jihyuk, who answered so plainly, looked as if he did not understand why I was even asking such a question. And, the moment I heard Jihyuk’s words, the tension strangely drained out of me.

The strength in my shoulders, which had been tensed up all day from carrying a heavy bag and running around here and there, seeped away. At the same time, it felt like a part of my heart had become a little more at ease.

It was a strange thing. That Jihyuk’s nonchalant and concise answer had, for a fleeting moment, become a comfort to me.

Jihyuk’s words sounded exactly like that. That he liked me simply because I was Kim Jeonghyun. That it was okay for me to exist as just one small human being, not as the young head of the household who had to take responsibility for and lead everything for his family. So, it was okay to not try so hard and to lean on his shoulder from time to time to catch my breath.

“Haha….”

A laugh escaped me before I knew it. Seeing myself laughing so unresistingly while listening to Jihyuk’s words, I think I must have a screw loose. Jihyuk was still looking down at me with an expression that said he had no idea what was going on. But Jihyuk soon grinned, following my lead.

“Why are you laughing.”

Rustle, his hand that came closer to touch my bangs was hot and gentle, as always.

“I don’t know why, but you’re prettier when you laugh. I’ll have to make you laugh often from now on.”

The low voice that had always terrified me had, at some point, become no longer scary to hear. Jihyuk now unabashedly says cheesy things with a voice that is even verging on flirtatious. As I listened to that voice, an unexpected thought popped out of my mouth before I could stop it.

“…You should have made me laugh… sooner.”

“…….”

“You said you… liked me… why, why did you have to… hurt me so much.”

Even I, who brought up the words, was surprised. It would be a lie to say that there was not a single shred of resentment towards him in my heart. Because even now, after some time has passed since the past I do not even want to think about, and Jihyuk is treating me with his own form of respect, there are still times when resentment towards him rears its head.

But I never thought I would express it so directly to Jihyuk like this. I had never thought that I was expecting anything from him. Right now, when I cannot even put a name to my relationship with Jihyuk, the only thing I could allow him was to just ‘show him my face’ as he had requested. That was why I thought there was no need to resent him for anything.

But now that I had voiced my disappointment, I could vaguely realize my own feelings. That although it could not compare to Jihyuk’s immense yearning for me, the truth was that I, too, held a sense of regret regarding our relationship. And the fact that this regret must have stemmed from some kind of expectation.

It could have been more whole. Our relationship, too.

Perhaps we, too, could have laughed because of each other like we were now, rather than shedding tears, sighing, shouting, and trembling in fear.

“You’re right. I was a d**bass.”

Jihyuk chuckled, his eyes cast downward.

“You’re so pretty when you laugh, and I didn’t even know.”

Reaching out his hand, Jihyuk touched me again. The hand that stroked my hair, my earlobe, my face, lingered a little longer today than usual. Instead of pushing his hand away as I always did, telling him to stop, I simply let Jihyuk be.

It was not simply because Jihyuk’s warmth was comfortable. From his touching hand, the sincerity he had not fully managed to say was being conveyed just as it was.

It is not like I can forgive Jihyuk completely with just that. Because the moments of resentment, tears, sighs, and hatred piled up towards him are still stacked layer upon layer.

However, at least in this moment, as I was receiving a small comfort from Jihyuk’s touch, I did not feel like pushing him away.

“…I, have to go. I came to get a book.”

After leaving my face in Jihyuk’s hands for a long time, I finally said so and removed his hand.

“Where are you going.”

“The school library.”

“Then get your book and come out. I’ll give you a ride.”

“…You will…?”

Jihyuk readily nodded his head.

“If it’s okay with you, seonsaengnim.”

Looking back and forth between Jihyuk’s face and the motorcycle standing behind him, I recalled the memory of riding with him before. No, in truth, it was a scene I had never buried deep in my heart. Whenever I saw someone riding a motorcycle, that scene would automatically play in my mind.

After going inside and grabbing a book, I hesitated for a moment before walking out the main gate. Jihyuk was already on the motorcycle. The motorcycle, with its engine started, growled and resonated as if to rush me.

“Get on.”

Jihyuk tilted his chin towards the back seat and showed a grin. In that moment, my heart pounded heavily. When I got on behind him without a word, Jihyuk placed a helmet on top of my head. With a click, he secured the helmet to fit my head, then turned his body forward again and grabbed the handlebars.

He reached a hand back, took my hand, and made me wrap it firmly around his stomach. A hot temperature spread familiarly.

“Hold on tight. You’ll die if you fall off.”

Despite the thuggish tone in Jihyuk’s playful voice, it was steeped in warmth. It was the exact same thing he had said before. The fact that Jihyuk held the exact same piece of memory as I did made my insides churn once again, as if with motion sickness.

Soon, the frame began to glide forward. Through my stomach, my chest, my whole body. The spring breeze flew into my face, scattering the scent of flowers. The vibrations shaking my whole body continuously churned through me.

A pleasure that surpasses the mind electrifies and shakes my entire body. On the straight road ahead, Jihyuk increased the speed more and more. Along with the engine sound like a beast’s cry, a sense of freedom spread throughout my body.

More, more. The needle on the speedometer gradually tilted to the right. It felt like we might reach the end of the world at this rate. Despite that, I did not feel scared or anxious.

I still have not been able to fully let Jihyuk into my heart. I also still cannot declare that I will love him in the future. But, I think I will try moving forward once. While holding the hot, firm body pressed against mine.

“Go faster!”

Hugging his firm waist tightly, I shouted loudly so as not to be defeated by the rushing wind. Instead of an answer, Jihyuk let out a whistle, whoosh, and increased the speed with a fierce vibration. The two bodies, overlapping in the same posture, raced down the straight road without hesitation. The wind relentlessly dug in, making a mess under my clothes and my clothes fluttered wildly, but I was soon leaning against the familiar warmth, filling my eyes to my heart’s content with the sunset I could not see earlier. It was a pleasant spring evening.