Ch 12

Lying upside down on the bed, Ji-an stared intently at his phone screen. Whenever the screen dimmed, he tapped it to bring the image back, while using one hand to cradle his kitten, Bobo, who was busy gnawing at his hair.

“Bobo, are you trying to eat my hair again and end up gagging?”

Bobo let out a long “meow” in protest, so Ji-an placed him on his stomach and turned his focus back to his phone screen. Ji-an’s life seemed to continue in a strangely uncertain, in-between state.

He’d never raised a pet before, so when he suddenly took in the kitten, his initial plan was to find Bobo a good home once he recovered. But after spending a few days together, Ji-an found himself completely captivated by the little creature who followed him everywhere.

“Should I go out later and buy some toys? There will be plenty of things for you to chew on instead of my hair.”

The whole notion of saving money and getting organized seemed pointless now. “Guess it’s just us till you go to kitty heaven someday, Bobo.”

While continuously looking at the same screen, Ji-an muttered to himself despite knowing there would be no response.

“Bobo, your hyung landed a job, you know? But… why don’t I want to go?”

As Bobo wriggled up from Ji-an’s stomach to his chest, he lost his balance and tumbled between Ji-an’s shoulder and neck, letting out a small, irritated squeak.

“I should stick with you until you’re brave enough to be alone, right?”

Starting in the New Year, he’d need to leave for work, meaning Bobo would be home alone. How could such a young kitten manage on his own for hours? Ji-an sighed, picked up Bobo, who was gnawing on his hair again, and tossed him lightly onto one side of the bed.

“Look, if I work and make money, I can play with you even better, can’t I? Let’s say I’m not going and look for a part-time job instead. That should work, right?”

He’d gotten into a promising startup, but with a serious expression, Ji-an sent a message saying he couldn’t take the position due to personal reasons. Even after sending it, he couldn’t put down his phone, his fingers moving to his call history.

The man had promised to call in a few days, but Ji-an hadn’t heard a word since. When he’d given his number the first time, the man had confirmed it by calling, but the second time he didn’t even check. Ji-an had no way of reaching him now, and even if he could, it wasn’t like he’d actually make the call. But knowing and not knowing felt entirely different. Now, he was simply left to wait—and if the call never came, that would be the end of it.

So that’s the end with him, too.

Ji-an thought of Haneul but shook it off. What could he say? “Could you give me your friend’s number?” Besides, after that night out, no one would believe he didn’t know him, and it’d only lead to awkward misunderstandings.

“Ah… really.”

Feeling increasingly restless, Ji-an threw himself onto the bed and rolled around, only to suddenly freeze.

Then, at least the companion’s contact could’ve been shared. Thinking about it, that guy really did things his own way.

In the end, Ji-an was left with nothing.

“Whatever. Whatever. Bobo! Hyung’s unemployed. Let’s grab some treats and go shopping. Should we get a cat tower? Or maybe you’re still too young to climb one?”

Ji-an sprang out of bed, opened the drawer where Bobo’s treats were, and gave him a little something to nibble on. Though he’d said they’d go out, Ji-an curled back into his blankets, only finally stepping out as the Haneul turned red at sunset.

Sure, he could’ve ordered things online, but Ji-an insisted on picking them out himself for Bobo. He bundled up, placed Bobo in his clear carrier with his favorite blanket and a hot pack for warmth, but soon reconsidered.

“You stay here, Bobo.”

Despite securing him safely, Ji-an ultimately decided it was better to just run the errand quickly on his own. Bobo, however, seemed to view this as a game, leaping in and out of the carrier with wild excitement, bringing a broad smile to Ji-an’s face.

“All right, fine, let’s go.”

Strapping the backpack-style carrier on his chest and wrapping a scarf around it, Ji-an even started humming. They arrived at a large pet store in the bustling district, but the energetic Bobo left Ji-an hardly able to focus.

You always want to stay in your carrier at home—what’s with the fuss now?

“Meowww! Meowww! Meeooow!”

Bobo’s demanding voice echoed through the store, and Ji-an, embarrassed, looked around, catching the eye of a staff member, who nodded with a reassuring smile. Ji-an finally relented and gently took Bobo out of the carrier, then slung the backpack back on.

Of course, it’d be strange if he wasn’t excited. After all, they’d been at home in the same routine, and now here they were in a vibrant, colorful store.

“All right, all right, let’s start by picking out a leash.”

Holding Bobo securely with one hand and supporting his little belly with the other, Ji-an whispered to him while kissing the top of his small head.

The pet store was bustling, with couples and families browsing for toys and gifts for their beloved pets as they prepared for a cozy holiday season.

“Y-yes… um, hold on, kid. Your hyung’s on the phone, okay?”

While they were in the leash section, Ji-an’s phone rang. Without checking the caller ID, he answered, distractedly browsing the colorful collars and harnesses.

—”Is this Seo Ji-an?”

“Yes, that’s me. Okay, this one? This one?”

Though he answered, Ji-an’s attention was completely on Bobo, his eyes darting between the rainbow array of leashes and harnesses. Being so young, wouldn’t a harness be better?

—”Where are you right now?”

Ji-an knelt down, looking for a small collar that would fit Bobo, his kitten of about 6–7 weeks old. 

“Who are you?” he asked carefully, unable to remember the name of the person whose voice sounded somewhat familiar. The tone seemed to match the person he had in mind, though confirmation felt necessary.

—”…This is Choi Ideun,” the voice finally replied.

“Oh….”

—”Are you busy?” Ideun asked.

“No, not really,” Ji-an replied, though his hands, which had been busy choosing a harness for Bobo, had stopped moving. 

So he did call, after all that waiting. But why now?

Ji-an’s gaze shifted, contemplating whether a yellow harness would suit Bobo better than a red one, given Bobo’s orange fur. 

—”Are you outside?” 

“Yes.”

—”What are you doing…?” Ideun’s tone softened slightly.

“Harness shopping,” Ji-an replied.

—”I’ll come meet you. Let’s talk.”

He hadn’t yet seen the cat tower, bought the snacks, or chosen the toys… and not even a harness yet. 

Ji-an looked down at Bobo, who reached out with a tiny paw to tap an orange harness. Cats don’t like strangers, right? But if he insists on coming…

Ji-an couldn’t refuse and gave Ideun his location, ending the call. He quickly purchased a yellow harness with the help of a store clerk, carefully fitting it onto Bobo. Cats are supposed to be easily frightened and averse to unfamiliar places, but that didn’t seem to apply to Bobo. Ideun said he’d be there in 20 minutes, so Ji-an figured he had enough time to buy Bobo’s snacks and toys.

Holding the leash connected to Bobo’s new harness, Ji-an strolled around the store, placing various items into a basket. 

What a strange man. Appearing as he pleased, saying only what he wanted, then disappearing without a word for days—then suddenly calling, insisting on meeting. He could’ve settled things back then, when he mentioned compensation, but he had avoided it. 

Was he after something else?

As the time Ideun had mentioned approached, Ji-an packed everything he’d bought into the carrier and stepped outside with Bobo. Inside, Bobo had pranced around happily, but as soon as they faced the cold outdoors, the kitten froze, climbed onto Ji-an’s shoe, and settled there. 

“Oh, my Bobo. It’s so cold, huh? Cold, so cold.”

Realizing he hadn’t bought a coat for Bobo, he picked her up, and she trembled, burrowing into his chest for warmth. They hurried back into the store, and when they emerged again, Bobo was now dressed in a blue padded vest, just like Ji-an’s.

Peeking out of Ji-an’s coat with her little face, Bobo watched the white puffs of Ji-an’s breath, seemingly trying to catch them as if they were something tangible.

His moment with Bobo was interrupted by a car that pulled up and stopped nearby. Ji-an’s smile faded as a man stepped out from the driver’s seat and walked toward him.

Ji-an’s first words were, “You’re okay with cats, right?”

Ideun stopped and looked down at Ji-an, then at Bobo, who was peeking out from Ji-an’s chest with big, curious eyes. The sight of both of them, wide-eyed and staring back, made him chuckle.

Even though Ideun had thought of contacting Ji-an a few times, he let time slip by, not reaching out.

Earlier that day, as he and Taemin had been discussing project proposals, Taemin had casually mentioned, ‘Haneul’s friend reached out to HR, saying he won’t be able to start.’

‘What?’

‘I stopped by HR earlier, and they were busy looking for a replacement since he said he can’t join due to personal reasons.’

‘Put it on hold.’

‘Hold what?’

‘We need a clear reason.’

And that’s why he now stood here, having canceled his evening plans, facing someone he thought he’d eventually forget.

“Oh, you don’t like cats? Bobo, let’s go back in the carrier for a bit,” Ji-an said, trying to gather Bobo, who was snuggled into his coat. Ideun raised a hand to rub his forehead.

“Have you eaten?”

“No…not yet.”

“Let’s eat and talk. The cat’s fine.”

Before he knew it, Ji-an found himself seated in the passenger seat of Ideun’s car, hugging Bobo as he glanced over at him. Ji-an wasn’t the type to be led around by others, nor was he usually passive. Since coming here, he’d had to take charge of every situation, protecting what he was responsible for.

Except for one person.

Aside from Baek Sanghoon—a man he could only describe as a terrible connection—no one had ever thrown him off balance. After the initial trauma and bouts of fleeing and resisting, Ji-an had come to terms with it. 

It wasn’t because of the man who had pursued him relentlessly, willing to use any means to bring him back. It was because of the one person he kept encountering, time and time again, even when surrounded by silence and darkness. That one person became familiar, even if Ji-an wasn’t sure if the feeling was mutual. By the end…

As Ji-an petted Bobo, who was playing with his sleeve, he leaned his head against the car window. A little while ago, he had sat in this very seat, and here he was again, stuck in traffic, still not knowing where they were headed.

“…Traffic’s pretty bad. How about Korean food?” Ideun asked, breaking the silence.

“Oh, yes…whatever’s fine.”

At the sound of Ideun breaking the silence, Ji-an straightened up quickly, nodding.

“This is Choi Ideun. It should take about an hour; could you please prepare a meal? No, it’s nothing like that… a quiet room, please. Also, this is a personal visit, so Manager Baek…”

When the name “Manager Baek” slipped into the conversation Ji-an couldn’t follow, his fingers playing with Bobo halted. How many people in the world have the surname Baek? Still, the mention made Ji-an’s heart skip a beat as he tapped Bobo on the nose to shake it off.

But if he thought about the man he’d once spent the night with in France… Could he meet him again? If they ran into each other, would he recognize him? And if he did… then what? Would he announce, “I’m your rut partner”? No, he’d never say something like that, not even if his life depended on it. Besides, the man probably didn’t even remember him. Thinking of Sanghoon, with his stern, relentlessly professional demeanor, Ji-an considered that maybe he hadn’t intended things to go that way, anyway.

A strange line of thought trailed through his mind, and Ji-an let out a small chuckle.

“What’s so funny?”

“Nothing, really. It’s just… this whole situation with you is a bit strange,” Ji-an replied with a shrug.