DEARG Ch 29

Uncharacteristic stubbornness from Jo Jihyun made Kang Seokwon let out a short laugh.

“What do you want to eat?”

“Instant noodles.”

Kang Seokwon raised an eyebrow. He knew Jo Jihyun wasn’t particularly fond of instant noodles, just as he wasn’t.

“Let’s go to the convenience store.”

Kang Seokwon reached for his crutches.

“Take the wheelchair. I heard the doctor say you shouldn’t use crutches for a while.”

Jo Jihyun brought over the wheelchair. Kang Seokwon stared at it silently.

“Get in.”

Jo Jihyun said, unfolding the footrests.

“I can’t push it with one hand.”

“I can push it. Hurry up and get in.”

Kang Seokwon sighed softly and got into the wheelchair. As they moved through the hallway, several nurses greeted Jo Jihyun. He returned each greeting politely. Kang Seokwon, seated in the wheelchair, clicked his tongue softly.

“You hate it that much?”

“I do.”

“You should make a good impression. They’re the ones taking care of you.”

Knowing the sincerity behind those words, Kang Seokwon said nothing. The elevator arrived. Jo Jihyun pressed the button for the basement level where the convenience store was.

“What do you want to eat?”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Wasn’t there something at least a little better?”

At the convenience store, Kang Seokwon would pick up various instant noodle brands, rotating through them before paying.

“They’re all bad.”

Jo Jihyun gave a short laugh.

“Then I’ll choose.”

Jo Jihyun parked the wheelchair by a table and went into the convenience store. He picked two instant noodle cups, tore open the plastic, and poured the seasoning packets inside.

“I’ll get the water.”

“Be careful with the hot water.”

Kang Seokwon said as he separated the chopsticks. Jo Jihyun nodded. He placed the cups filled with hot water on the table and sat across from Kang Seokwon.

While waiting for the noodles to cook, they sat facing each other without speaking. Their knees brushed slightly across the table. Each time their eyes met, Jo Jihyun quietly watched Kang Seokwon’s fingers intermittently tap his thigh. He was still nervous in front of him. It was endearing.

“They’re ready.”

Kang Seokwon said, handing over the chopsticks. Then he narrowed his eyes.

“Can you use chopsticks?”

Jo Jihyun’s right hand was injured.

“No.”

“Then how are you going to eat?”

“Aren’t you going to feed me, sunbae?”

Kang Seokwon was visibly flustered by Jo Jihyun’s unexpected comment. They’d never done this in front of others.

Jo Jihyun smiled quietly. Kang Seokwon stirred the noodles a couple of times to cool them, then twirled some and held them out to Jo Jihyun. Jo Jihyun took a bite.

“Does it taste good?”

“No.”

Kang Seokwon’s face twitched into a frown.

“I wanted to try it.”

“Why, of all things?”

“Because you always ate this, sunbae.”

Kang Seokwon had said he watched him until the noodles got soggy. Jo Jihyun wanted to spend that time looking at Kang Seokwon too.

“Want to throw it out?”

“No. I’ll finish it.”

Jo Jihyun ate the noodles as Kang Seokwon fed him. After finishing, Jo Jihyun pushed the wheelchair and asked.

“Want to go for a walk?”

“A walk?”

It was still snowing.

“It’s cold. You’ll catch a cold.”

“We can stay indoors.”

Kang Seokwon nodded, saying, “Alright.” They took the elevator to the first floor and walked along the hallway. Neither Kang Seokwon in the wheelchair nor Jo Jihyun spoke.

Through the hallway window, they saw a snow-covered landscape. Jo Jihyun stopped the wheelchair by a row of chairs.

“It’s a suspended sentence.”

Jo Jihyun broke the long silence. The trial was held that morning. Jo Jihyun had attended as a witness.

“It’s her first offense, it was impulsive under diminished capacity, she’s deeply remorseful and sincerely repenting, and the family pleaded for leniency…”

Reciting the judge’s verdict, Jo Jihyun trailed off, unable to suppress his rising emotions. In cases like this, it’s rarely overturned in the second trial. The social worker who visited after the trial had said it with regret.

Kang Seokwon patted Jo Jihyun’s hand. The touch conveyed countless sincere sentiments: You did well. Thank you. It’s okay.

Jo Jihyun closed his eyes and opened them.

“Sunbae.”

“Yeah.”

“Are you thirsty? I’ll get a drink.”

“Alright.”

Jo Jihyun said, Wait a moment, and went to find a vending machine. Kang Seokwon gazed silently out the window. Then he suddenly turned around.

“Jihyun-ah.”

Kang Seokwon called out, but there was no response. He grabbed the wall and stood. Without crutches, he took a step, and sharp pain shot up his leg. He lost balance and fell. A loud crash echoed through the hallway.

“Sunbae!”

Jo Jihyun, spotting Kang Seokwon on the floor, ran from the end of the hallway.

“Sunbae, are you okay?”

Jo Jihyun helped him up with a startled expression.

“Why did you get up suddenly?”

Instead of answering, Kang Seokwon gripped Jo Jihyun’s hand tightly. When Jo Jihyun winced, Kang Seokwon, startled, let go.

“Sorry.”

“It’s fine.”

Even a brief absence made Kang Seokwon unable to contain his anxiety. He couldn’t even walk this short distance properly. Realizing these two facts, Jo Jihyun felt his blood run cold. He helped Kang Seokwon sit back down and checked him over.

“Are you hurt anywhere?”

“No.”

Kang Seokwon still couldn’t let go of Jo Jihyun’s hand. His expression was like that of an abandoned child. Jo Jihyun sat beside him, still held.

“Want a drink?”

“Yeah.”

Even as he answered, Kang Seokwon kept staring at Jo Jihyun. Jo Jihyun pulled two cans from his pocket and handed one to Kang Seokwon.

“This is the drink you gave me the first time, sunbae. Remember?”

Kang Seokwon nodded.

“Can you give it to me again?”

Kang Seokwon opened one can and handed it to Jo Jihyun. Jo Jihyun took it. They sipped the drink they hadn’t been able to share back then, its sweet scent lingering on their lips.

“It’s snowing a lot.”

“…”

“Will it snow all night?”

“Maybe.”

Even during the conversation, Kang Seokwon’s gaze stayed fixed on Jo Jihyun, never wavering.

“Should we go back up?”

“Yeah.”

Jo Jihyun gripped the wheelchair handles and walked slowly down the hallway. They rode the elevator in silence.

On the way to Kang Seokwon’s room, a nurse stopped them.

“Mr. Kang Seokwon, did you forget you have an outpatient consultation with the doctor today about your surgery?”

Despite being only a year older, everyone naturally used honorifics with Kang Seokwon.

“Sorry.”

Kang Seokwon apologized without excuse.

“You need to go now.”

“Sorry, but could you take him instead of me?”

At Jo Jihyun’s request, Kang Seokwon shot him a sharp look. The nurse, aware of Kang Seokwon’s lack of a guardian, took the wheelchair handles without objection.

“Where are you going?”

Kang Seokwon’s voice was low as he asked.

“I have some paperwork to sort out.”

“…”

“Go. I’ll be waiting.”

With a look full of unspoken words, Kang Seokwon glanced at Jo Jihyun before turning away.

The consultation with the doctor didn’t take long. The doctor calmly explained, in a pessimistic tone, why the surgery was necessary, potential side effects, and its pros and cons. The possibility of not walking properly didn’t faze Kang Seokwon. His mind was entirely on Jo Jihyun. He wanted to finish the consultation quickly and return to the room. He scheduled the surgery and completed the consultation.

“Patient, we have a lot of others right now, so you might need to wait a bit to be moved.”

The nurse at the desk said with a slightly troubled voice.

“Can I borrow some crutches then?”

“Aren’t you supposed to avoid crutches because of your shoulder? That’s not good.”

The nurse tilted her head, puzzled by Kang Seokwon’s condition.

“It’s fine. Please.”

In the end, Kang Seokwon borrowed crutches from the desk and went to the 13th floor. Sweat dripped just from walking the hallway. But he couldn’t slow down. He wanted to run if he could. He needed to check if Jo Jihyun was still there. They’d promised to meet in seven years, but he wasn’t ready to part yet. No, he might never be ready. Jo Jihyun had said he’d wait, but he might have left. He didn’t know exactly when he’d leave, but he was certain their time together was running out. Even a brief absence was unbearable, and seven years felt like a cruel punishment. He reached the room. His hand hesitated on the doorknob. His lips were dry. What if Jo Jihyun wasn’t there? What if he could never see him again—not just for seven years, but forever? Fear paralyzed his reason. His body grew cold from his fingertips. I’ll be waiting. Jo Jihyun’s voice echoed. Kang Seokwon gripped the handle and flung the door open.

Jo Jihyun, sitting on the bed looking out the window, turned his head. Their eyes met, and he gave a faint smile.

Kang Seokwon realized what Jo Jihyun meant to him.

If the day came when he lost him, he’d search for him his entire life.

No matter how many years it took, he would.

Kang Seokwon slowly approached Jo Jihyun.

“You finished faster than I thought… Wait, why are you on crutches? Where’s the wheelchair?”

“It broke.”

Kang Seokwon tossed the crutches by the bed and sat beside Jo Jihyun.

“You know you’re bad at lying, right?”

Kang Seokwon smiled without answering. Jo Jihyun looked at him and sighed.

“Don’t push yourself. I’m worried.”

“Alright.”

“Did you schedule the surgery?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s good.”

Jo Jihyun turned his gaze back to the window. “The snow stopped,” he murmured in a somewhat lonely tone.

“Want it to keep snowing?”

At Kang Seokwon’s question, Jo Jihyun raised his eyes slightly, looking a bit surprised. It wasn’t a difficult question, yet his reaction was odd.

“…I don’t know.”

Jo Jihyun continued hesitantly.

“Just, it reminded me of Jeju Island.”

An unexpected typhoon had stranded them there due to a change in its path. It was an unforgettable day.

“Let’s go again.”

Jo Jihyun nodded with a faint smile. Kang Seokwon held his chin and pulled him close. Their lips touched softly and parted. A delicate distance. Without hesitation, they sought each other’s lips. Jo Jihyun sucked on Kang Seokwon’s parched lips, wrapping his arms around his shoulders. Kang Seokwon slid his hand under Jo Jihyun’s coat, unbuttoning his shirt, then clicked his tongue in displeasure.

“Sorry.”

Jo Jihyun’s apology carried a hint of amusement, and Kang Seokwon asked, “For what?”

“For not wearing a hospital gown.”

Hospital gowns, top or bottom, were easy to remove. Kang Seokwon lightly tapped his forehead against Jo Jihyun’s and whispered.

“Go change.”

Jo Jihyun was still in his outing clothes from the courthouse. He obediently got up from the bed.

“Sunbae.”

Jo Jihyun, about to leave the room, turned and called him.

“Yeah.”

“See you later.”

“Alright.”

The door closed. Kang Seokwon leaned back on the bed. His shoulder still ached from using the crutches, and his knee was worse. Searching for painkillers in the drawer, a sudden thought made him catch his breath. He picked up the phone on the table and dialed room 1205. The line rang. He needed to answer, he would answer. He gripped the phone anxiously, listening to the repeating tone. After a long time, the call didn’t connect. Kang Seokwon grabbed the crutches he’d tossed aside. Unable to wait for the elevator, he headed for the emergency stairs. Each step sent sharp pain through his knee, but he had no time to care. Later, he ran without the crutches. It didn’t matter if he could never use his leg again. He opened the door to room 1205. Seeing the perfectly made bed, his heart sank. There was no trace of Jo Jihyun. He ran to the desk. “Jihyun—where’s the patient from 1205?” The patient from 1205? He was discharged this morning. The nurse answered, puzzled. You must be mistaken. It was supposed to be in three days, but it was moved up to today. He was here just a moment ago. Kang Seokwon’s voice rose, and the nurse flinched, stepping back. Kang Seokwon pressed his palm to his forehead. “Please, check one more time.” The nurse, visibly scared, typed on the keyboard. Yes, Jo Jihyun from 1205 was discharged today. She turned the monitor to show him. Kang Seokwon froze, staring at it. Anything else you need? the nurse asked nervously. “No.” He barely answered. His mind went blank. See you later. Jo Jihyun had said that. He should’ve said, See you tonight or See you at dinner. See you later. It was too long a promise. How was he supposed to endure it, with what thoughts was he to wait? He’d let Jo Jihyun go without preparation. His heart collapsed. The boy had told him to wait, to believe in him, that it had to be this way. Without explaining why, he’d said it. No matter what, I won’t let you go. His voice and eyes were sincere. Kang Seokwon believed in the boy. It was the natural right of someone who loved. Yet, this was utterly devastating. Like a man set ablaze, he thrashed, not knowing what to do. Each breath felt like his throat was tearing. His vision darkened. He didn’t remember how he got back to his room. Sitting on the bed, he panted heavily. Sunbae. It felt like he’d open the door and call out any moment. Seven years, he’d said. Even an hour from now felt distant. The slender body he’d held moments ago came to mind. There’d been enough time to change into a hospital gown. His eyes, gazing at the sky when the snow stopped, flashed in his mind. He’d said he was going to America. Like the day they were stranded by a typhoon, Kang Seokwon wished a snowstorm would delay the flights. Anger surged. He hadn’t noticed how reluctant Jo Jihyun had been. Kang Seokwon grabbed whatever was in reach and threw it to the floor. With a crash, the table toppled. A pillow fell, and papers stuffed inside scattered. Bending down, he picked up the bundle. Seeing the white envelope, he realized what it was. He’d asked for a handwritten letter as a gift. He cherished the boy’s handwriting, keeping their written exchanges tucked in his favorite book. The envelope was thick, too much to hold in one hand. Jo Jihyun’s right hand was broken. He must have written all night with his unfamiliar left hand. To sunbae. The handwriting was shaky, like a child’s. Imagining Jo Jihyun sitting alone in the room, preparing for their parting, his breath caught. With trembling hands, he barely opened the envelope. His blurred vision could only make out the opening.

To sunbae.

Kang Seokwon clutched the letter, swallowing his only regret.

If I’d met you even a day sooner.

I would’ve cherished and loved you more than anyone.

See you later.

Alright.

The seven years they’d promised had to begin now.

Kang Seokwon slowly closed his eyes.