TWENTY 6

If it wasn’t going to be taken awkwardly, it would have been an easy thing to resolve, but the most important problem had just arisen.

Facing that clear, bright face that had just opened its eyes while wearing pajamas felt like the root of all trouble. The thought that the conversation flowing in this direction at all was wrong grew much stronger in his mind than before.

It couldn’t be helped; now was the time to let Youngwon know his true feelings in earnest.

“So what do you suggest we do?”

“Let’s get married, you and me.”

“…”

“We’re both actors, so let’s align both of our sides’ stances and announce it. After properly finishing marriage preparations, maybe, like, a month before? Marry me, Hyung.”

“I understand what you’re saying, but you can’t just go around getting married like that. First of all, what’s the most important thing? You have to be in love, right?”

“I am in love with Hyung? Are you… not?”

“Of course not. Just how many days ago did you become an adult?”

“…”

“Don’t go making Hyung out to be some kind of scoundrel. I told you a long time ago that wasn’t going to work, and yet you’re still doing this.”

“Ha. Then I suppose first I’ll have to make Hyung fall in love with me.”

Hearing Youngwon’s muttering, Jiseo licked his dry lips with a troubled expression.

First of all, setting everything else aside, he wasn’t someone who was obligated to like Youngwon just because Youngwon liked him once.

Back when they were little, they had simply made a promise without any tokens or proof, like “Let’s get married” and “Okay!” He had gone along with it at the time simply because Youngwon, who clung to him, was cute.

He had assumed Youngwon made that promise without knowing anything, too. So it was true that he had thought lightly of it, figuring it would naturally fade away once Youngwon met many other people later on.

After all, the person closest to him was himself, and they had known each other for almost every moment since birth and childhood. But because he had been such a young child back then, that kind of delusion wasn’t entirely incomprehensible.

“Youngwon. Didn’t you date anyone when you were in school?”

“Of course not. There was no one I liked, so how could I?”

“…”

“No, wait. When there’s someone I’ve even promised to marry, how could I meet anyone else? Is this what I’m supposed to say to score points?”

“Score points for what?”

“So that Hyung will fall in love with me.”

“…”

“I suppose feelings of affection can sprout up just from looking at a face. My face fits those criteria pretty well, doesn’t it?”

Translating his confident statement, it meant that since his face was quite decent, just looking at him might cause affection to bloom.

That much was true. Youngwon was pretty. And on top of that, he was handsome. Since that was an undeniable fact, he had no choice but to accept it.

Feelings could indeed develop just from looking at someone’s face. As someone who had heard the phrase “your face is my type” far more times than Youngwon could ever compare to, Jiseo could naturally understand that part.

However, no matter how pretty a face someone had, feelings that hadn’t existed until yesterday weren’t going to magically appear just to show off for a kid who had barely turned twenty. Every time he looked at him with that soft, downy, youthful face, guilt simply blossomed endlessly inside him.

Going to a PC bang and taking a train trip. And watching him as he patiently held back until he turned twenty, only to have his very first cute rebellion consist of drinking alcohol for the first time—seeing a kid with only those experiences, Jiseo kept falling into deep contemplation.

Should he accept the situation unfolding right before his eyes as a joke, or should he take it seriously?

He was so torn between these two possibilities that Jiseo couldn’t immediately lean toward either side.

Since genuine feelings of liking him were actually mixed in with that cute childhood promise, it was nothing short of troublesome. Even so, it was practically as if he only had one choice left.

If he couldn’t choose either extreme, Jiseo decided to mix a healthy dose of humor and seriousness.

“I think you’re way too young to get married, though.”

“Young? Me?”

“By international age, your first digit is still a 1. Not even a cradle-robber would snatch someone that early.”

It was a choice meant to turn Youngwon away from his mindset, but actually speaking the words out loud made him realize just what kind of atrocious act he shouldn’t dare commit.

“If it feels burdensome, should I wait? Since Hyung is still young too, after all. In about 5 years, Hyung will be thirty-five. And I’ll be five years older as well. Do you think it’ll feel less burdensome then?”

“…”

“Still, I don’t really understand why the reason we can’t get married is because I’m young. I was the one who waited for Hyung because Hyung was young, you know. Honestly, right before saying this just now, I was even debating whether I should wait another year.”

At Youngwon’s confident assertion, Jiseo asked back with a voice mixed with a dry chuckle.

“You were?”

“The age where people believe they’ve become a real adult varies from person to person, right? And Hyung said he still thinks I’m not fully grown yet.”

“…”

“If we’re going by that logic, I feel the same way. Considering how you look and how you said you still have a lot of things you want to do—from that perspective, I admit that Hyung is at a young age too.”

The very phrase he had kept on the tip of his tongue from the start out of a desire to maintain modesty was precisely that he was young and lacked experience.

Moreover, he remembered answering in a recent interview that much more time had to pass before someone could become a true adult. Youngwon was probably referring to that.

“But we were going to get married anyway, so doesn’t that make it irrelevant? Waiting a few more years isn’t going to change our relationship…”

“…”

“To be completely, honestly frank, I want to sweep Hyung away back when he’s at his absolute prettiest, you see.”

“You’d know if you had ever met anyone else. You’re honestly just way too young.”

To Youngwon, that probably sounded like a textbook excuse for rejection. But this was Jiseo’s true sincerity.

Being young meant that your world was still narrow. Jiseo knew very well that when people talk about a ten-year age gap, it feels massive, but once you hit thirty, the word “mere” tends to follow right behind it. Even so, wrong was wrong.

“I’m telling you, I’ve been waiting all this time because Hyung was young! So you could promote vigorously while you were in your youth. And Hyung hasn’t dated anyone either.”

“Hyung started acting after becoming an adult. So I didn’t have the bandwidth to think about anything else, but since you started doing what you wanted to do earlier, you must have been a lot freer than Hyung.”

“Even if I wasn’t free, there was never anyone who caught Hyung’s eye anyway. Whenever people asked if there was someone you liked, you always answered that there wasn’t.”

“And you even tried?”

“Well, of course I have to prepare it myself first. When I’m all grown up, I have to propose to Hyung, after all.”

Youngwon raised his eyebrows with the look of someone saying, Isn’t that obvious? Jiseo had zero dating experience either, but anyone could tell that the situation Youngwon was placed in was several times wider and more glamorous.

Even so, he didn’t seem to have any experiences worth bragging about. Thus, Youngwon concluded that there was no reason for him to back down.

“The face of your first love is right here, so how could anyone else possibly catch your eye?”

From the very beginning, Youngwon didn’t understand what Jiseo meant by a “wide world.” He already possessed the ultimate experience.

“I’m saying that since I was young, I waited for Hyung precisely because Hyung was too young to be tied down to me either.”

“…”

“What would people say if I snatched away a baby who just debuted? I had no choice but to wait.”

Youngwon couldn’t fathom why Jiseo couldn’t understand his words. So he couldn’t help but shrug his shoulders, even after seeing Jiseo wear a continuously flabbergasted expression.

“What about me? What would people say about me?”

“Even if my seniority is lower than Hyung’s, it’s true that I started promoting at a younger age than Hyung when he first began acting, right? When people look at me, they think, Ah, he’s grown up this much already, time flies, don’t they? They’d think I can act reasonably well by now, wouldn’t they?”

Putting aside the fact that Jiseo was his sunbae, Jiseo had far more experience and a much larger filmography. Seeing Youngwon defend his argument with such absurd logic made Jiseo burst into involuntary laughter.

Sensing perhaps that even to his own ears his persuasiveness was lacking, Youngwon gestured with his hand to cut off Jiseo’s reaction.

“Calm down and wait. I still have a lot more to talk about.”

No matter how hard Youngwon tried to persuade him, looking at that clear, striking face made it impossible for guilt not to creep in. In Jiseo’s eyes, the image of Youngwon wearing a school uniform was still vivid.

Naturally so, since it had only been a few days since he took off that uniform. And yet, for him to treat him like a baby—it inevitably drew a breathless laugh.

“I’m dead serious about keeping the promise to get married. Once you let me focus on making Hyung like me—meaning, letting me woo you… you’ll want to keep that promise in no time, you’ll see. Let me have a taste of dating, too.”