TTQI 29

“I don’t like a big fuss being made about my departure. It’s not like I’m going off to die, but I just know someone will make a scene. I can already tell just by looking at how many farewell dinners I’ve been called to these past few days.”

“Ah.”

“Don’t worry too much. I won’t tell you guys to follow me out when I leave. You can come down slowly after I’m gone. You have luggage, after all.”

“Understood.”

“Anyway, it looks like you’ve packed everything you need to. If you’re all done, you can go and rest now. Tell your colleagues as well. You’ve worked hard until late at night.”

“Merrill and I will sleep in the storage room.”

At the servant’s words, Ade showed his disapproval.

“There’s no need for that! Why would you subject yourself to such hardship, sleeping in a damp storage room in this god-awful weather? You’ll wake up with your backside all wet, and anyone who sees you will think you wet yourself in your sleep. Don’t leave anyone behind; all of you go to your quarters together. Besides, I’ve already packed my travel gear, so I won’t need your help when I leave.”

“But…”

“If it really bothers you, one of you can wake up. If the rain has stopped by dawn, knock on the door. I’ll be leaving around four o’clock, so before then. I’ll at least say my goodbyes before I go.”

“Understood.”

He had been uncomfortable with the thought of neglecting his master’s needs, but he finally seemed to be at ease with Ade’s compromise. The servant bowed his head with a dip before withdrawing. Ade gave a light wave of his hand, signaling for him to really be on his way now. His expression showed that any more looking after would be a nuisance.

Soon, the servants gathered in front of the door. Following Ade’s order to leave only the light he would take to the bedroom, the servants blew out all the flames except for the candle on the table, then quietly closed the door and left. In the room that had darkened in an instant, Ade did not get up right away and instead gazed out the window for a while.

Once the servants were gone, the sound of the rain in the silent room seemed much louder. The ‘pitter-patter’ sound of the rain hitting the window sounded dreary. Ade watched the raindrops fall on the window and trickle down, leaving long tails, several times before suddenly murmuring.

“My life is quite eventful, too.”

A hearty laugh followed. He was thinking of the lie he had just told and found it absurd. When his servant had asked why he was leaving in such a hurry, he had answered, ‘I don’t like a fuss,’ which he now thought was pathetic.

It was half-true and half-false. To be precise, Ade was afraid that ‘that person’ would show up to see him off. He was afraid that his friend, who hadn’t visited him once even after hearing he was leaving, would be pressured by public opinion to come see him off with an uncomfortable look on his face. And, instinctively ashamed of this fact, he had lied to the servant as if he had a guilty conscience. How pathetic.

Even as he gazed out the window to clear his head, Ade unconsciously thought of that person, like a tamed dog. His old friend, Prince Zizlon, who had bound him to the royal palace with an unknown power until now.

It was something worth lamenting as eventful. To have the biggest fight of his life with his friend, get sulky, and only then declare his independence. And even as he was trying to disappear to cut him off, to be thinking of his face on the very last day of his departure.

The thought that crossed his mind while looking out the window was also tearfully sad. Seeing the harsh weather, he suddenly grew concerned for the friend who would be left alone. Why on earth was he worried about him, who would be sitting in the warm royal palace, receiving all sorts of luxurious service as a prince! He would surely be fine on his own.

The fact that his friend probably wasn’t thinking about him at all made Ade feel even more miserable. He resented his friend, who was equally kind to everyone and therefore all the more cold. Villeneuve had never received more than the handful of affection from the prince that everyone else got. He only realized this recently, after his relationship with his friend had grown distant. He was sick and tired of the one-sided relationship he had with Zizlon.

‘They say there’s been a lot of talk about a substitute since my leave was decided.’

His already indifferent friend now seemed even more unconcerned with Ade’s existence, being engrossed in state affairs. Ever since it was decided that he would be taking a long leave, there had been much talk in the royal court about a substitute deputy commander for the 2nd Royal Guard. And one of the people most ardently involved in selecting candidates for the substitute was none other than Prince Zizlon. Ade let out a cynical sneer as he recalled hearing news every day about who Zizlon had rejected and who he had recommended.

‘If he’d shown even half that much interest in my leaving, I wouldn’t be going like this.’

The prince, who was so vocal about the substitute position, remained silent about Ade, the master of that very position. Given the situation, it was only a matter of time before Ade, who had been watching his movements closely, came to realize that his friend had changed. Once he was sure, there was no more hesitation.

‘Why should I care about someone who won’t even come to say goodbye once.’

Ade, who had been deep in thought, deliberately snorted loudly. The reason he made the sound was partly to jolt himself. It was to clear his mind of his own thoughts, of foolishly thinking about that person even in this situation. Please, just for this one last time, let’s not think about him.

Thinking about it more would only build up resentment. To calm his churning stomach, Ade decided to stop thinking about Zizlon. He shook his head vigorously to dispel his thoughts and returned to reality. The sound of rain beating loudly against the windowpane and the damp darkness finally returned to his scope of awareness. Now that he noticed, the dampness by the window felt unpleasant. As if to express his anger, Ade roughly picked up the candlestick.

The weather was gloomy, and his mood was troubled; he thought it best to just go to sleep quickly. His irritation might make it a little hard to sleep, but if he wanted to wake up early in the morning, it was right to go to bed now.

He was aware that his insistence on leaving early might be worrying his servants, but he had his own valid reasons. The prince, whose face was uncomfortable to see, was a problem, but so were other people. For example, the king, who had tried to dissuade him until the very end.

For some reason, the queen seemed to be extremely displeased with Ade’s absence, and the king, knowing this, had tried to hold Ade back with real persistence. That was also why his departure date had been postponed day after day.

The king, who had dragged his feet for days and days negotiating Ade’s departure date, suddenly set the departure for the middle of the rainy season when it was pouring down. He was probably aiming for Ade to postpone his departure due to the poor weather conditions, but Ade, knowing this, planned to push ahead with his departure even if it was a bit unreasonable. Because if he gave up again, he didn’t know when he would be able to leave. Anyway, if only to avoid facing the royal family members with their inscrutable attitudes, Ade planned to leave early in the morning, in secret.

Candlestick in hand, Ade first secured the door. He locked the door that had been left open after the servant left, gave a quick check to see if any lights were left on, and then turned toward the bedroom. And it was just as he grasped the handle of the bedroom door.

Knock, knock.

At the sudden sound of a knock, Ade paused his hand. He turned his gaze in the direction of the sound with a puzzled expression. He saw the dark interior of the house and the still door. The door, cloaked in a bluish shadow, gazed back at him quietly as if nothing had happened. Was he mistaken? Just as he was thinking that, the sound came again. This time, it was much clearer.

Knock, knock, knock.

‘What is it?’

Ade raised his eyebrows and placed the candlestick on the table.

As he approached the door, he had a strange feeling—perhaps it was the atmosphere. Ade was the type who didn’t believe in intuition, except for the premonition of love. But the gloom of a darkened house on a rainy day created a bizarre impression. And for some reason, a subtle sense of anticipation raised its head. Without even realizing what he was anticipating himself, Ade carefully turned the doorknob. And the door opened.

As soon as the door opened, the fierce sound of rain struck his eardrums.

Whoosh—.

“You?”

Seeing the person standing in front of the door, Ade murmured reflexively. And at that moment, ‘kruuumble,’ lightning flashed. For a fleeting moment, the other person’s face was clearly revealed in the light. Due to the scorching light, Ade momentarily squinted his eyes.

In the brief moment after opening the door, a flash of disappointment he didn’t even register passed, and in the very next moment, curiosity filled its place. Seeing the person standing outside the door, Ade wore an ambiguous expression that was neither smiling nor crying. The midnight visitor was someone he could never have imagined.

It was Pym, the Queen’s favored attendant. Far from having avoided the rain, his entire body was soaked, as if he had been caught squarely in the downpour on his way. His suspicious appearance, with water dripping from him, was one thing, but the expression on his pale face was so empty that it felt strange. His dilated pupils were even eerie. The person who usually chattered away annoyingly like a lark was now looking at him in meaningful silence. Gripped by a sense of unease, Ade stood there blankly for a while.

“What are you doing, here?”

A moment later, that was the only thing he managed to say. It also encapsulated the feelings he was experiencing in one sentence.

Just then, Pym jerked his head up, and Ade frowned in surprise. Seeing Pym’s face properly, Ade finally realized that what was flowing down his face was not rain, but tears. Streaks of water, split into several paths, were running down his cheeks. He was a bizarre sight, like something out of a nightmare.

“What.”

“Lord Villeneuve.”

At that moment, Pym, who had been ominously silent, called out to him. He clasps his hands tightly and takes a step toward Ade. Not only was his skin white, but the uncanny glint in his eyes was eerie. For reasons he couldn’t fathom, Ade felt the urge to close the door.

Pym, clasping his hands tightly, asked haltingly.

“I heard… you’re, you’re leaving the… the royal castle tomorrow?”

“…Yes. I am, but?”

When he answered in spite of himself, Pym’s eyes grew even wider. He shot back insistently.

“Why? Then when are you coming back?”

“Why are you asking that?”

“Someone told me today. That Lord Villeneuve is actually preparing for retirement, and that even though you said it was a leave, you might never come back. Surely, that’s… not it, right? That person was just guessing, right?”

Ade frowns. The other’s fierce interest was beyond his comprehension. To him, Pym was nothing. The space he had allotted in his heart was so small that he was just a little better than a stranger. Therefore, he was surprised that Pym was even interested in this matter. To be honest, it was uncomfortable.

“That’s enough, stand back a bit.”

“Lord Villeneuve? It’s not true, is it?”

“I don’t know either. That’s enough of that, so calm down. What do you think you’re doing right now? Did you steal your master’s liquor or something?”

“Good heavens.”

Pym’s mouth fell open, and his eyes went blank.

“S-so it was true.”

Ade paid little attention to his dazed muttering. As an emergency measure, he brought Pym inside the room. An uninvited guest he may be, but he couldn’t just leave such a small, fragile-looking boy to be drenched in the rain. Cold rain rushed in behind Pym, who was pulled along blankly by Ade’s hand. Ade lightly clicked his tongue as he looked at the wet floor.

“Sniff sniff, doesn’t seem like you’re drunk… Tsk, what a disaster. I’ve packed everything away, so there’s nothing to wipe this up with. The servants have all gone home, too. I’ll light a fire for you as a quick fix, so go sit on the carpet.”

“…”

“Hey, are you listening?”

Once inside the room, Pym fidgeted with his hands busily, his eyes darting about nervously. It was clear that some calculation was furiously spinning inside his small head. The signs were not good, so Ade, too, was at a loss for words and just watched to see what he would do.

Finally, as if he had made up his mind, Pym looked at him. Ade was utterly shocked by the statement he made.

“Th-then… f-for the last time. Please… just once… h-hold me.”

“What did you say?”

Pym’s shoulders flinched at his reflexively loud voice. But even while trembling, he did not bend his will. A servile, distorted smile formed on his pale, rigid face.

“I-I’ve heard… that Lord Villeneuve… is, is fine with men, too. I… I may not be a great beauty like, like Her Majesty the Queen. And I’m not skilled, but… I’ll try my best. Just think of it as granting a humble servant’s lifelong wish… Heaven will surely reward you.”

“…Do you even know what you’re saying right now?”

“I… I’m going to be tied to the royal castle for the rest of my life now. I’ll be serving Her Majesty the Queen by her side for my whole life. I won’t be able to get married either. I might never see you again, and I don’t want to let you go like this. At least take my first time so I can have a memory!”

“Ah?!”

Before Ade could come to his senses and push him away, Pym had put his resolve into action. He threw his arms wide open and charged at Ade without warning. Caught off guard by the sudden action, Ade let his guard down. Pym wrapped his arms around Ade’s chest and clung to him tenaciously.

“I love you, Lord Villeneuve!”

“What… is this! Let go of me!”

Even so, he couldn’t hold out long against Ade, a trained knight. Ade forcibly pried his arms open and shoved away the body that was trying not to be separated. Pushed back by the momentum, Pym staggered backward, hit his back against the wall, and barely managed to stop. Though he avoided falling thanks to leaning against the wall, Pym’s knees gave out, and he trembled as if he were about to collapse.

“Ugh… ugh….” Pym whimpered in a small voice.

“You…”

Assuming a guarded stance, Ade stared at Pym with a cold gaze for a while. Perhaps due to his bewilderment, he couldn’t easily open his mouth and seemed to be trying to understand the situation.

“Wh-why? Do you hate me?”

Meanwhile, Pym, leaning against the wall, kept sniffling as he wiped away his tears. His reddened, swollen eyes and the blue-tinged wetness on his cheeks were so pitiful that even the most cold-hearted person would feel sympathy. Ade was displeased and confused, but at the same time, he felt pity. He took a deep breath to regain at least some of his composure. It took considerable patience to overcome his discomfort.

“I don’t know what on earth has gotten into you, but… you’re not in your right mind right now!”

“Ughh… no! I’d rather die. Than live my whole life being oppressed under that tyrant without ever being held by the person I love.”

“What did you say?”

And suddenly, Pym threw a tantrum. He abruptly ran forward and swept everything off the table with his arm. Since the candlestick was on the table, Ade was startled, but fortunately, the toppled candle rolled onto the floor, where it was extinguished by the pouring rain. But thanks to that, the room was plunged into pitch-black darkness. Only the occasional flashes of lightning intermittently illuminated the space between them.

“…I told you to calm down!”

Ade shouted, bewildered. After his rampage, Pym went limp and helpless again. He wept in the darkness, his eyes flashing with a strange light.

“Ughhh… heuu, why? Why are you leaving? Is it because of the prince?”

And the moment the prince was mentioned, the composure Ade had maintained vanished. Gritting his teeth and rolling his eyes, a ferocious expression settled on his face.

“…You’d do well to watch your words!”

Pym’s cries grew even more intense.

“That man, the prince, held a grudge because of the argument that day and kicked you out of the castle, didn’t he? You fell out of the prince’s favor because you defended me, didn’t you?”

“What? …Such delusions are beyond your station! He is not someone who would do that! And it’s even more ridiculous to think that my life would be swayed by the likes of you.”

“Then what is it? Are you leaving because he was mean to you?”

“Who do you take me for!”

“But it’s true that you fought with him.”

“…”

Having his innermost thoughts exposed by an unexpected person, Ade was at a loss for words and could only glare with blazing eyes. Pym, who was watching his reaction, had a look of despair flicker in his eyes.

“So… it’s true after all.”

“…It is not!”

“Don’t lie, don’t lie!”

Pym shrieked in a piercing voice and then kicked the table in a fit of temper. He would cry and beg one moment, then suddenly throw a tantrum the next. His wildly swinging moods were bizarre. Sure enough, Pym’s demeanor changed to submissive again, and this time he pleaded in an earnest voice.

“Lord Villeneuve… can’t you not leave?”

“No matter how much you cling to me, I cannot reciprocate your feelings. I have never once thought of you in that way!”

“…S-still… don’t leave. I’m fine with you just being by my side. Right… I-I’ll… I’ll make sure he can’t do that again.”

“What do you mean, you’ll make sure who can’t do what?”

“…That person, the prince… I’ll make sure he never… treats Lord Villeneuve like that again… so, so don’t go.”

Pym’s voice dwindled to a small sound like the fluttering of an insect’s wings, but unfortunately for him, his words reached Ade’s ears vividly. Yet Ade doubted his own ears for a while. It was that absurd for a mere servant to speak of the venerable prince in such a way. Thanks to this, Ade missed the chance to scold him and could only stare foolishly at the other. As if to remind him, Pym spoke once more.

“I-I can do it. From now on, I’ll make him respect and fear you, my lord.”

“You really have gone mad!”

In that instant, Ade’s eyes blazed, and he strode forward, closing the distance between them in a single step. He was excessively enraged, like someone who had been caught off guard by an unexpected blow. Pym was so surprised by the stronger-than-expected reaction that he even hiccupped. Frozen in surprise, Pym was instantly seized by Ade’s powerful grip. Ade grabbed him by the collar and lifted him up with tremendous force. Feeling the force that was about to pull him up, Pym stood on his tiptoes.

“Hic…!”

“I’ve let you go on and on, and you just keep spouting endless nonsense! You must not value your worthless life! If I weren’t on leave right now, I would have cut off your head on the spot. Because it is the duty of a Yonaras soldier to dispose of traitors like you!”

But Pym was not the same timid boy he usually was either. The fear that had filled his large eyes gradually turned to madness as he witnessed Ade’s excessive anger. He began to shriek at the top of his lungs, veins popping on his neck.

“Why! Why, why! That person is the one who hurt Lord Villeneuve! Why, why! Why are you angry!”

“Shut up! He is my master! He is not someone who can be judged with such personal feelings!”

“Then what about lust? Is lust not a personal feeling! Be honest! Lord Villeneuve wants to sleep with him, doesn’t he! That’s why you won’t hold me!”

“What did you say!”

“Be honest! I said, be honest! How could you do this to me! I even got slapped on the cheek for trying to protect you! But he only gets angry at you! I cherish and love you, so why won’t you look at me, why won’t you look at me! Aaaargh! What am I not good enough for! Why, why, why!”

Blinded by jealousy, Pym went so far as to shriek in a metallic voice. He thrashed about, throwing a tantrum, and kicked Ade’s legs several times in the process. At last, Ade’s long-strained reason snapped. He threw Pym mercilessly to the floor, and Pym screamed as he tumbled across it.

By the time Pym scrambled to his feet, Ade was drawing the sword from his hip. The agitation from his anger was so strong that his hand, gripping the hilt, trembled finely.

Ade shouted.

“How dare, how dare you insult him with such disgusting words!”

Hearing this, Pym, still collapsed on the floor, made a sound like a hiss of air.

“…Are you getting angry now because of the prince, not even because of me, my lord? Are you, are you this angry over something so trivial? He’s human too, can’t the word lust even be mentioned?”

Ade immediately and firmly retorted.

“He is far nobler than vile creatures like you could ever imagine!”

“Pfft… pffhahaha!”

And it was at that moment. Pym, who had been filled with malice, suddenly let out a bizarre, stifled laugh. Giggling, he then burst into a fit of laughter, unable to hold it back. He clapped a hand over his mouth as if he’d heard the funniest story imaginable and his shoulders shook convulsively.

At this, Ade’s face twisted grotesquely. It was not a reaction one would expect with a sword at their throat, so he was bewildered by Pym’s sudden strange behavior. Just as he was beginning to suspect that Pym had finally gone mad, Pym wiped away tears that could have been from laughter or sorrow and asked. His voice, still suppressing laughter, conveyed how funny he found it all.

“My goodness! Poor Lord Villeneuve! You don’t know anything… what’s a poor thing like you to do? This Pym will comfort you. Hahaha, hehehe.”

His appearance, dabbing at his tears while laughing, looked more triumphant than sad, contrary to his words. Seeing this, Ade felt insulted without knowing why.

“What do you think you’re doing? Will you not shut up!”

“My, my, Sir Knight, you know even less about His Highness than I do.”

“…What was that?”

“I said you don’t know!”

At that moment, Pym pushed the sword away as if he’d gone mad and shot up from his spot. His laughing eyes were filled with rage and madness. Judging by the look on his face, where reason seemed faint, he was undoubtedly spouting whatever came to mind without a thought for the future. Startled by his momentum, Ade unknowingly took a step back.

“Lord Villeneuve, why do you think I was slapped by my mistress?” he asked with a snicker.

“You probably did something as crazy as this.” Ade retorted sarcastically, not to be outdone. Hearing his words, Pym once again clutched his stomach and let out a ‘cackle.’ Then, as if doing him a kindness, he began to explain slowly.

“My mistress is usually indifferent, but she would always fly into a rage if you touched something she cherished. And since a lowly servant like me offered an opinion on a matter related to ‘that,’ how could I have avoided being punished?”

Ade did not respond to the incomprehensible words.

“No matter what words you try to bewitch me with, it’s useless. I will drag you out immediately and for the crime of running your mouth as you pleased…”

“The prince is not the kind of person you think he is!”

At that moment, Pym cut him off and shouted. After shouting hysterically, he immediately began to cackle unnaturally again. Ade momentarily felt a sense of unease and paused. At this, Pym, intoxicated with the thrill of a sharp victory, trembled and began to let loose the words he had suppressed inside. As if a blocked dam had burst, the hidden truth poured out of his mouth without restraint.

“What…”

“You seem to be under some grand delusion, but that person is not someone worth protecting to the point of blaming yourself, Lord Villeneuve! That person is already dirty, despicable, and foolish enough!”

Ade seemed so shocked he was speechless. Pym, oblivious to what he was doing, reveled in his sense of superiority and chattered on excitedly.

“Poor Lord Villeneuve! You’re the naive one! You haven’t the faintest idea what that person is doing behind your back, do you? He does things so vile that even a common prostitute from the marketplace couldn’t imagine, and he does them without batting an eye! I’ve never in my life seen such an unrestrained lecher.”

“What… did you say…?”

Pym let out a coquettish snort, as if looking down on his frozen opponent.

“Don’t you understand, my lord? You are the prince’s friend, and yet you haven’t noticed a thing? Didn’t the soldiers report to you that the queen passes through the corridor to the prince’s room every night? Or did you hear and simply forget? I have never seen such a hopelessly naive bunch in my life. All you accursed Yonaras people are steeped in sloth. Pffhehe.”

“Shut up, shut up! You bewitching… How dare you…!”

Suddenly feeling an unknown fear of what would come next, Ade cut Pym off and raised his sword high. Pym, on the other hand, instinctively felt that while the other might fear his words, he wouldn’t be able to stop him from speaking. If that weren’t the case, he would have slit his throat already. Ade was afraid, yet he was waiting for the words to follow. And, while pretending not to believe, he was, in fact, suspicious. That is why Pym had to say it.

“Did you truly not know at all that the two of them couple every night!”

“!”

Clang! The sword, having fallen from Ade’s hand, made a loud noise as it hit the floor. It was unheard of for a noble knight to drop his sacred sword. The fact that Ade, a proud knight, had dropped his sword was proof of just how shocked he was. Ade’s shoulders trembled as if he had actually been struck by lightning. He then shouted urgently.

“Don’t talk nonsense, there’s no one in the palace who doesn’t know that those two are like cats and dogs! Do you dare to slander your mistress and His Highness!”

Unable to contain his agitation, Ade finally lost all self-control. Showing a rare display of violence, he immediately backhanded Pym across the cheek. Pym cried out with a single scream and stumbled backward. But even with his cheek stained red, his spirit was far from broken; he tenaciously straightened his body and glared at his opponent with a menacing gaze.

“I spoke the truth!”

“To think a deceitful servant would insult them with such vile words, I want to wash out my ears! But I will do that after I’ve dragged you to your mistress. This has crossed a line for which you cannot take responsibility! Even your mistress will have to take responsibility for letting your insolence go unchecked!”

“Go on and try! If you want to make this official, then by all means, do so! I will only lose my lowly life, but your dear friend will lose something much greater!”

“With that glib tongue of yours, you dare to…!”

“You think this is all my imagination and slander? I am too lowly to have such an imagination! By what means could I imagine his lewdness? How could I imagine him shuddering in pleasure as he receives a man’s member, him losing all restraint to the point of being comparable to a beast, or the fact that in bed, the prince is no different from a whore! Are you perhaps surprised now? Oh, my cute Lord Villeneuve! Your cheeks have turned bright red!”

“Shut up, I told you to shut up!”

Ade raised his hand high, as if he would strike his cheek again at any moment. At this, Pym grew even more venomous and shrieked defiantly. He cowered away in the opposite direction in preparation for Ade’s blow, but he continued to pour out words without stopping.

“It’s no use taking your anger out on me! This isn’t some thrilling fantasy, it’s reality! In fact, the reality is far worse than what I’m telling you! Why are you pretending not to believe me! The prince is a vulgar bitch! He’s filthy! If you can’t believe me, see for yourself! If you run to the castle right now and peek in, you’ll see that everything I’ve said is true! And it won’t just end with your cheeks turning red then! Because even the great Lord Villeneuve won’t be able to bear watching with his eyes open!”

“…”

“Ugh…!”

“…”

Eventually, Pym noticed that the pain he expected to fly at him any second did not come. He squeezed his eyes shut, then cautiously opened them to peek at the other’s movements. Ade was standing quietly beside him. As if he no longer intended to hit him, his hands were lowered calmly. His face, which had been hideously contorted, was now expressionless. He was looking at him quietly, as if lost in some thought. Feeling a moment of triumph, Pym slowly raised the corners of his mouth. He thought.

‘Oh my, Lord Ade must be really shocked. How shocked must he be to stand there like a fool without saying a word? I thought I’d get hit at least a few times.’

Then Ade, who had been silent, took a few steps back and silently picked up his fallen sword. Pym watched him, not letting his guard down. Even then, Ade said nothing.

Pym thought.

‘That aside, he really must be shocked. To be this quiet? This is a little different from what I imagined… Right. He’s really not saying anything? This much…’

It was around the time a creeping sense of unease began to raise its head. Pym, who had been dazed, was startled when Ade suddenly turned to leave and rushed at him. He hastily grabbed Ade’s arm and looked up at him with trembling eyes.

“…Wh-where are you going?”

“…”

The expressionless Ade glanced at Pym once, then, as if looking at grass by the roadside, he tried to move again without answering. Pym was so shocked he gasped for breath and snatched his arm again.

“I asked where you are going!”

“…Since it seems you have no intention of shutting that disgusting mouth of yours, I shall take my leave.”

“Y-you’re leaving me like this?”

“…”

“N-no! No!”

As if it wasn’t worth answering, Ade began to walk again. Realizing that he was heading outside, Pym was horrified and clung to him as if he were having a fit. When Ade shook him off in annoyance, he hugged his legs and clung to him this time.

“D-don’t go! Please don’t go!”

Only then did Pym realize what he had done, and a chill ran down his spine. Pym realized that he was heading to the castle, just as he himself had suggested. Everything went black before his eyes. What on earth have I done! Realizing the repercussions that would befall him, Pym clung to Ade for dear life. The face of the enraged queen was drawn in his mind. So frightened that the blood drained from his face, tears burst forth.

“Let go.”

“No! You can’t go. This lowly servant misspoke! It’s all a lie, I made it all up because I wanted Lord Villeneuve’s attention!”

Ade shook his leg as if annoyed. Pym clung to him, weeping loudly.

“Please, save me! Sir Knight, stay with me! Ahh! I’m begging you! You’ve been so kind to me until now! If you have even a shred of affection for me, please! Please! If you go, I’m a dead man! Lord Villeneuve!”

Pym begged with tears, clinging desperately. But Ade shook his leg again in annoyance and finally managed to shake him off. Pym tumbled to the ground pathetically. As if he couldn’t care less about Pym’s life, Ade walked out into the rain in a single stride, and just before leaving, he looked back at Pym one last time. He said.

“Don’t ever let me see you again! You disgusting bastard!”

“…!”

The contempt and hatred in his face. The moment Pym saw it, all the strength drained from his body, and he collapsed onto the ground like a fool.

And Ade left. Without a second glance. Shielding his head with his hands, he ran out into the rain without hesitation. Before long, the downpour swallowed his figure into the darkness. The direction he was heading when last seen was clearly the direction of the castle, where the prince was.

Pym, who had been sitting on the floor in a daze, utterly crestfallen, at some point muttered in a despairing voice.

“Ah! My god, what have I done!”

No sooner had his words ended than a deafening clap of thunder echoed through the night sky.

The moment he stormed out of the room, Ade felt lost. He had run out due to an inexplicable urgency and was now walking distractedly, led by his subconscious. Being fully exposed to the fiercely pouring rain without any protection made him feel like he was losing his mind.

But though bewildered, he did not stop. The moment he ran out of the room, his legs were taking him somewhere. He was walking toward the royal castle as if possessed. Though he couldn’t open his eyes properly because of the rain hitting his face, he steadily drew closer to where the prince was.

「If you can’t believe me, see for yourself! If you run to the castle right now and peek in, you’ll see that everything I’ve said is true!」

‘Vile creature!’

Ade’s face contorted with a surge of nausea and rage. He felt a revulsion that went beyond the sentiments of a subject whose monarch had been insulted. To Ade, the prince was that kind of being. The personification of nobility and sublimity. An idol who transcended the realm of ordinary humans.

Although he had criticized him for having changed, Zizlon’s position in a corner of his heart was already so firm that there was no room to dispute that he was a sublime figure. When he recalled the prince’s warm smile, his anger toward Pym grew even fiercer.

But it was ironic. If his faith in the prince was so steadfast, then where was he going now? The reason he couldn’t think of anything right now, the reason he felt so lost, might be because he didn’t want to face the fact that he himself harbored doubts. Perhaps the intense anger he felt at Pym’s outrageous words was just a pathetic attempt at self-justification.

In any case, Ade moved through the fierce downpour like a man possessed.

“…”

Before he knew it, Ade was standing at the foot of the castle wall, looking up at the king’s window. A faint light was seeping out. The prince was probably inside the room. Though it was a little early to be asleep, the fact that the light was not turned off made a creeping sense of anxiety raise its head.

‘…I’m just confirming. To point out that Pym’s, that person’s, mistake, I need to confirm it for sure. There can be no room for doubt.’

Ade reassured himself. No doubt, the reason the light was on was nothing special. He was probably working on official duties or studying late. The prince was a perfectionist and a hard worker, so it wasn’t an uncommon occurrence.

‘Once I confirm, I will go back immediately.’

Ade firmly grasped a protruding stone on the castle wall. The second floor was not very high, and Ade knew well the parts of the wall he could climb. He hadn’t used them much since coming of age, but as a child, he had often climbed the walls. Because the prince often worked hard late into the night and frequently didn’t sleep. At those times, Ade would volunteer to be the debauched problem child.

If he climbed the wall and knocked on the window, the prince would reluctantly put down his pen, and Ade would whine and make him drink alcohol to get him to sleep early. He was a bit old for such mischievous pranks now, but what was the big deal about climbing a wall? He was the prince’s closest friend, and his generous friend had never made an issue of such pranks. He was probably just poring over a book late into the night like a stuffy old man anyway, so no great harm would come from taking a little peek, Ade thought.

Ade steadily climbed the wall. He scaled the wet wall nimbly, puffing and panting. Soon, he was able to look into the window. He peeked into the room cautiously, being careful not to be discovered by the prince.

Inside the room, only a single dim candle was lit, making it difficult to find the figures hidden in the shadows without looking carefully. But he soon found a human trace. Ah, the person lying there must be the prince. Crunched in a bizarre shape….

“…”

The icy rain beat down on his cold forehead. The hand gripping the stone ached from the cold. Ade froze, his face pale. His mind went completely white. A dizzying spell hit him, and he almost lost his grip. Ade barely managed to put strength into his trembling hand.

“Heuk… ugh, ugh! Hah, hah….”

Why was he only hearing it now? When he listened closely, he could hear feverish, lewd gasps that had been spilling out for some time. The one who sacrilegiously occupied the prince’s bed was panting like an animal, pinned beneath a white, naked body. The queen’s symbolic platinum-blonde hair cascaded over that person’s face, so Ade could not make out their face. However, the tone of the voice was despairingly clear. It was someone Ade knew. His friend was making sounds he had never heard in his life.

“…”

The sight of the two naked bodies entwined was utterly primal. The way they mixed their bodies wantonly was a far cry from the nobility he had spoken of. It was like watching savage beasts yielding to instinct. Ade felt nauseous, whether from shock or disgust.

Plunged into a state of panic, Ade stared at the two for a few seconds, unable to even think of escaping the scene right away. Fortunately, he came to his senses a moment later and thought that he had to leave before being discovered. With a wretched heart, still lost in a sense of unreality that he could not believe, Ade hastily moved his legs. A slow anger began to boil within a mixture of disappointment, betrayal, and fear. To think he was betraying the king and engaging in such a vile, foolish adventure!

In the midst of this, Ade suddenly stopped his body.

“Ah…ah… Augh… Keo… keok….”

It was because the voice, which at first listen had been a sweet moan flushed with heat, was gradually starting to take on a strange tone.

“Keoheok… heok… S-sa… save… save me….”

Ade turned his gaze back to the room in surprise. And at that moment, the queen lifted her bowed upper body. The wavy silver hair that had covered the prince’s upper body was swept away, and at last, the prince’s face was revealed, his mouth wide open.

Ade gasped without realizing it. Because the prince was shedding tears of blood. He soon realized that it wasn’t tears of blood but blood from elsewhere that had pooled in his eyes and was now streaming down, but the shock remained.

The scene on the bed was a mess, like something out of a nightmare. That horrific scene remained as a powerful imprint in Ade’s mind, throwing his spirit into disarray. The gasping breaths he let out unconsciously in his shock were fortunately masked by the loud sound of the rain.

What he had thought were bestial movements intoxicated with pleasure had at some point become a struggle for survival. The prince, being choked, was pathetically unable to put up any resistance. He clutched Aion’s wrist and made gurgling sounds as if pleading, while helplessly surrendering the space between his legs. Red handprints were clearly visible on the prince’s neck, a sign of how many times he had been choked already. While being suffocated, he panted as if overwhelmed each time Aion thrust into him.

Then at some point, his hand dropped limply onto the bed, and Ade’s heart sank, fearing the prince was dead. Fortunately, at that moment, Aion released his grip on his neck, and Ade saw the prince gasp desperately for air.

The terrified prince, shedding crimson tears once more, hastily sat up. He stared at Aion, who was looking at him, with eyes full of terror and scrambled back toward the wall. The prince had hollow eyes that Ade had never seen in his life. His fully dilated pupils looked like those of a pathetic coward. As the queen drew closer, Zizlon trembled and shook his head.

“Ack!”

The queen grabbed his hair and twisted it carelessly, as if it were a handle. Zizlon’s face, revealed in the light just then, was covered in blood. One would expect him to be shocked at the noble prince being treated like a commoner, but the prince, as if accustomed to this action, only tried to immediately shake off the hand.

Despite the stark difference in their builds, Aion easily overpowered Despite the stark difference in their builds, Aion easily overpowered Zizlon as if handling a child. When he grabbed the prince’s genitals, the prince’s face flushed red and he clung to his wrist. Aion pulled the groaning Zizlon down and laid him beneath his body again.

“Keok…!”

His legs were forced apart and he was choked again. Zizlon’s eyebrows drooped downward, and his expression became one of servile pity. Aion stared at the prince wordlessly while putting his weight into choking him. His hair obscured his face, so it was impossible to tell what kind of expression he was wearing as he looked at Zizlon, but it was clear that he had not taken his eyes off the prince for even a single moment from the very beginning. And that the prince was looking at his face, terrified.

A moment later, the prince started convulsing and then his eyes fluttered shut. He had surely fainted. Saliva drooled unguardedly from his slack mouth. Aion continued to thrust into the limp body as if nothing was wrong.

“…!”

Pym’s description of the affair between the two as a clandestine romance was clearly wrong. This was a fight, no, a one-sided assault. It would be more fitting to describe it as a murder scene rather than the bedding of lovers.

Pale as a sheet, Ade barely managed to climb down the wall with trembling hands. In contrast to his skillful ascent, he stumbled down, nearly missing his footing several times, before finally reaching the ground.

Once on the ground, Ade was out of his mind. He quickly looked around with wide eyes, then hastily turned his back lest anyone see him. Terrified by the shock, he didn’t know what to do and simply ran away. In a daze where nothing made sense, Ade hurriedly left the place, half-walking, half-running.

There was a fantasy Zizlon pictured every day.

It was none other than the fantasy of confessing all the sins he had committed to someone, without omission. Zizlon was tired of deceiving people. He had never in his life deceived people so maliciously and systematically. Lying, in the first place, was something that did not suit his nature.

In fact, the environment he had lived in was so affluent that lying was unnecessary. By his side were advisors who were always ready to offer him advice unsparingly. His father, Ade, and his friends were loyal supporters to whom he could confide any secret without feeling anxious. He had never once in his life imagined that there would be a story he could not share with them.

That was why, when he came to deceive even them, Zizlon not only felt tormented but also felt as if the pillars supporting his soul were being dismantled and falling away one by one. In other words, Zizlon’s soul was not an individual but a community, and it was no exaggeration to say that a part of his soul was torn away when he was separated from them by the secret. Standing alone in the world, naked and exposed, he felt as lonely and ashamed as a newborn. The secret was too heavy to bear all by himself, and he lived in the fear that he could be crushed to death by it at any moment.

So he dreamed. Of himself, turning a blind eye to all the responsibilities and ethics that weighed him down. Of letting everything go without a thought for the future, and the pleasure of humbly accepting the consequences that would come his way.

In that fantasy, he would overcome the fear of being scorned and be daringly courageous. He would even confess the facts as they were to someone, without rationalizing or downplaying his actions. Only then would the conditions of the fantasy be met.

And the other person’s reaction to hearing it was the most fantastical part of the fantasy. The other person would listen patiently until Zizlon finished speaking, without showing surprise or frowning, without interrupting. And when Zizlon’s words finally came to an end, they would offer a gentle smile. As if what they had heard was of no great consequence compared to what they had expected.

And that person would kindly comfort the Zizlon who was shrunken with fear. The other person would pat Zizlon on the back, making Zizlon blame himself, asking why he had endured this alone, why he hadn’t confessed sooner and freed himself. He hoped the other’s reaction would be so calm that Zizlon would feel like an idiot for having worried.

And that person, rather than focusing on the many mistakes and foolish decisions Zizlon had made, would focus on the pain Zizlon must have received and grieve for him. As if the sins you have committed are not at all important compared to the wounds you have suffered. And they would warmly comfort and reason with the self-reproaching Zizlon, turning all the arrows of blame toward the world. As if to prove they were a complete ally, they would turn all the arrows toward the world and say in a confident voice, you have done nothing wrong, and if the world blames you, I will gladly become a sinner too. And they would repeat the words of forgiveness, over and over, until the hesitant Zizlon was convinced.

Zizlon would weep hot tears, held in his arms. He would shed tears of liberation, thankful for the friendship and love he enjoyed. Such a sweet, sweet fantasy it was.

It was a sweet fantasy where the other person, who listened calmly without interrupting Zizlon’s words, would gently comfort the Zizlon who was trembling in fear. Where that person, as if they had always been ready to hear this confession, would pay no mind to Zizlon’s evil deeds and only grieve over the pain Zizlon must have received.

And it was a fantasy where that person would soothe and comfort the weeping Zizlon, telling him that everything was nothing compared to their strong bond of trust. Where they would ache for the pain Zizlon had received, blame others instead of Zizlon for all the sins, and if not, willingly say they would become a sinner with him, and repeat words of forgiveness until Zizlon was certain. In his arms, Zizlon would weep hot tears. Tears of joy, finally liberated from oppression, grateful for the friendship and precious bonds he possessed.

The next day. In the early dawn, before the sun had risen. The prince opened his eyes on the cold bed. The bed was empty, and he was all alone in the room.

Still not fully emerged from the lingering effects of sleep, Zizlon sat up blankly. As he did so, the blanket slid down his naked body. He casually looked down and saw his body, which bore the traces of the previous night. Disgusted by his pale flesh, which was mottled with filthy marks, Zizlon sleepily gathered the blanket and wrapped it around himself.

Next, Zizlon looked around. The first things he saw were the fragments of a broken bottle and overturned furniture. Though the messy room and soiled blanket clearly showed traces of a person, there was no one in the room. The room was filled only with silence and a chill. The curtains were drawn back, and through the window, the bluish light and pale scent peculiar to dawn were seeping in quietly.

“…”

Staring blankly at the window, Zizlon suddenly thought that he could not live like this.

As if he had been submerged in the sea of sleep and was gradually floating to the surface, Zizlon was engulfed in an uncontrollable loneliness. It was an endless sense of melancholy. His vision went dark, yet he thought, ‘I finally understand.’ It was none other than the confirmation that his current life was more terrible than death.

And so, Zizlon resolved to die at once. It was not that he wanted to die. He had finally made the decision to die. He had reached a conclusion so firm that all his past weeping, fearing, and wavering seemed futile.

Zizlon staggered out of bed with unfocused eyes. He was moving without any proper reason, like a person sleepwalking. He was possessed by one strong conviction and moved without any other thought. Without even getting dressed, he wrapped the white blanket tightly around his body. It was commendable that he had at least thought to cover himself.

The prince left the room, at first stumbling, then gradually picking up speed. Soon, thinking that he could not delay this for another minute, another second, he sprinted down the corridor. The prince ran like a sinner, covering his face and body, following the shadows. He felt an urgency as if something terrible would happen if he did not die quickly. And strangely, on that day, the prince did not encounter a single person on his way out of the castle.

Anyone who saw the prince in his crazed state would have stopped him, but miraculously, the prince, who encountered no one, left the royal castle without a hitch. The prince passed by the stables as well. His mind was so numb that the thought of riding a horse didn’t even occur to him. It was no wonder, as he was even barefoot, not having put on shoes.

“Hah… hah…!”

With tears welling up in his eyes, the prince ran without rest until he reached his destination. He ran blindly, unaware of the blood from his feet, scraped by sharp gravel, or his body freezing in the cold dawn air. The place he finally reached after running until he was out of breath was the spring in the Caritas Forest, a place he often visited. The prince intended to throw himself into the pond.

“…”

But once he was standing in front of the spring, he at some point lost his sense of purpose and became dazed. He slowly approached the spring, but before his feet even touched the cold water, he had forgotten why he had come here. His mind had gone completely blank.

“…”

Perhaps, for his exhausted self, even dying was too much of an effort. Zizlon stood there, drained of strength, and stared at the spring water for a while. His own face, with its empty eyes, was reflected on the ice-cold surface of the water. He had a haggard face and a shabby appearance.

Zizlon looked at it for a moment, then turned around. He trudged over to a stump in a position where he could see the spring water and sat down. Then, like a broken doll, he sat there blankly, without a single thought. Unaware that his whole body was freezing in the seeping chill.

And how much time had passed? A certain sound with a steady rhythm began to drift faintly into the ears of Zizlon, who had lost his purpose and thoughts and had become a doll. The sound, rustle, rustle, seemed to be the sound of something pressing down on the forest grass. It was as regular as the sound of walking, but heavier than a human’s, and a little faster.