TCGAD 17

The carriage crossed the sky. Clatter clatter, it sometimes encountered birds and sometimes sped through clouds. It felt like an angry wave was crashing inside my stomach. The weather would abruptly turn cold enough to freeze my heart, and then hot enough to melt my mind.

And from a certain point, a familiar landscape began to appear outside the window. A place where buildings, large and small, were clustered together like toy blocks.

Thump thump, my chest pounded like a drum. As the ground grew closer and the buildings that had seemed so small grew in volume, it all started to feel real. I jumped out before the carriage even touched the ground. Grasping the cement wall, I dry heaved over and over.

“…Urgh.”

Since I had eaten nothing, only stomach acid kept pouring out. The gray asphalt wall was stained a dark color. With saliva dangling from my lips, I gazed at the back of the carriage. The carriage that had spat me out was returning without a shred of lingering attachment.

Wiping my lips with the back of my hand, I hardened my resolve once more. The water was now completely spilled. There was no longer any turning back. A sense of relief and, at the same time, an unidentifiable feeling of loss struck my chest.

Before I could even accept the joy of truly being back, I was incredibly thirsty.

“I really want to drink some water.”

The streets were excessively unfamiliar. This was because I had intentionally come to a place where I had no connections. My house had already been completely burned down, and besides, that was a place Bulkan already knew.

I started walking aimlessly. I could have bought water for a thousand won at a mart or a convenience store, but the problem was that I had no money on me at all.

“…Kyet.”

The little deer, apparently also thirsty, looked up at me pitifully.

People passing by glanced at Haengbok. To be fair, it made sense. Even a deer with ordinary brown fur would be a strange sight in the middle of a town like this, but Haengbok, being a deer whose entire coat was white, was extremely conspicuous.

“…What is that?”

“I don’t know, maybe they’re filming a movie.”

Haengbok, not knowing why people kept glancing at him, seemed a little scared and kept burrowing into my arms.

“Kkyet.”

I wandered around a park with Haengbok. I was wondering if there was a place to quench our thirst, and luckily, I found a drinking fountain. When I turned it on, water bubbled up like a fountain, trickle trickle trickle. It looked incredibly cool, so I quickly cupped water in my palm and let Haengbok drink.

“How is it, refreshing?”

Chomp chomp chomp, a ticklish sensation brushed against my palm. Watching Haengbok gulp down the water frantically, I also swallowed my dry saliva, gulp.

The water was incredibly cool. I quenched my thirst several times in a hurry. The familiar taste clung to my tongue. One might ask what taste water could possibly have, but it had that unique, refreshing flavor.

“…Haaa.”

Once I had calmed the desert that had formed in my throat, I could feel the warm sunlight beating down on my eyelids. Everywhere I turned was a landscape that seemed familiar yet strange.

I stood there blankly for a while. The first emotion I felt upon returning to the land of South Korea after so long was none other than confusion.

It was not because the changes were drastic. Rather, the problem was that everything was exactly the same.

…Office workers walking briskly while looking at their phones. Students who miss the signal while looking at their vocabulary books. Honk, hoooonk. Even people fighting while blaring their car horns.

“Hey, you son of a b**ch! Did you rent out the whole street?”

“Why are you cursing out of the blue? Are you showing off how uneducated you are?”

Everything was functioning normally. Even without a single speck of dust like me. All the wheels were turning perfectly in their places. Even though such a big thing had happened to me. People were just enjoying their ordinary lives. However, I did not feel a great sense of betrayal or anything like that. It was a feeling of being behind a glass wall that was very familiar to me.

“Two croakers tied together for five thousand won, five thousand won.”

“Did this come in today for sure?”

“Ah, of course, I guarantee the quality.”

I stood there, dazed, like a drifter on one side of a busy street where people immersed in the market were coming and going. Everything surrounding me was telling me that I was now back where I originally belonged.

The turbulent scenes that flashed through my mind like a revolving lantern overlapped with the daily life unfolding before my eyes. I was left stranded on the roadside like a lost child. It was chaos itself.

“Ah, for goodness’ sake.”

Thump, someone’s shoulder bumped into me from behind. A middle-aged mister popped out and immediately swore at me. I quickly bent my waist and apologized.

“I’m sorry.”

It was only two seasons. In that time, which could be called short, so very much had happened to me.

“Here, summer delicacy, we have flat peaches, peaches.”

Then, a familiar sound from nearby made my body flinch. Flat peaches? I quickly stole a glance at the truck with my eyes. On the truck, which was passing by with a chugging sound, boxes were filled to the brim with well-ripened, pale pink peaches.

“Kyet.”

Haengbok must have seen it too, as he l**ked his lips. He gently nudged my chest with his front paw. Before, if he acted cute, tasty things would pop right into his small mouth, but.

The problem now was that I had no money at all.

“You want to eat that?”

Kkyae, he looks up at me. His face was one that could not understand why I was not giving him food when it was right in front of him. It must be about time for him to be hungry now. I had wandered the park and deliberately picked soft-looking grass to feed him. I could feel people passing by looking at me strangely. It was endlessly embarrassing, but I washed the grass well in a public restroom and fed it to Haengbok. Nyum nyum, watching Haengbok eat well, I felt a sense of relief.

“Aae.”

Fortunately, the grass in this world seemed to suit his palate as well.

After letting him w** his tongue with water cupped in my palm, I also helped him pee in the toilet.

The journey had been excessively long and arduous. My whole body was now completely exhausted. I was dizzy and wanted to rest, but there was nowhere to lie down comfortably. To get a place to sleep, I needed money right away.

The first thing I did was wander around looking for a pawnshop. They were hard to find in this day and age, so I had to search and search the town floor. Growl, my stomach rumbled. This was bad. I did not have a single penny in my pocket right now. I could not possibly be more destitute than this.

Just as my feet were starting to hurt and my stomach was beginning to feel the pangs of hunger, a sign on an old building, with only its roof barely repaired, caught my eye. It read ‘Pawnshop’.

“Found it….”

That feeling was likely similar to the thrill of finding an oasis after wandering for days and nights under the scorching sun without a sip of water. I immediately quickened my pace. I went up the old stairs and stopped in front of the shop with ‘Pawnshop’ written on it. I carefully made a fist and knocked. Thump thump, the old glass window rattled.

“Excuse me.”

Not long after, clatter, the door opened.

“You here to pawn something?”

And then, a dark reddish face was revealed. His fist-like nose was red, as if he had been drinking in the daytime. His drunken eyes scanned my appearance. It seemed like he was appraising my worth.

“Do you even know what this place is?”

Hmph! He snorted. His eyes said, what kind of crazy b**t**d rolled in from god knows where? It was not that I did not understand such a reaction. After all, my current state looked like a beggar to anyone.

I looked at my reflection in the glass window.

There was truly no psycho like this psycho. My clothes were strange rags, as if I had come from performing in some play, and my face was pale like someone who had not even been able to get a bowl of thin rice gruel. It would not appear much different in the owner’s eyes right now.

“It’s not this, is it?”

The owner put his index finger to his temple and spun it around. He was asking if I was a loon.

“What, bringing such bad luck. A d**n mental patient for the first customer of the day.”

It seemed like he was about to close the glass window again. I quickly pushed my hand through the gap and stopped him.

“I brought some items.”

I quickly pushed my hand inside my clothes. I could feel a substantial presence inside, but I deliberately took out only a little. This was because I had been royally screwed over once before for trusting someone. I had no choice but to be extremely cautious.

“Here, for now, just these….”

What I took out were only two anklets. First, I wanted to know how much these were worth.

“What in the world are all these?”

The eyes of the owner, who until now had been looking at me like I was some beast abandoned on the street, opened wide.

“Wh-why?”

The owner’s chest, which had been leaning back, suddenly lurched forward. His posture changed to be so aggressive it was burdensome, and he placed the magnifying glasses that had been dangling from his chest onto his fist-like nose with a click. When he turned on the old lamp, a bright light poured out. The red jewels shimmered, showing off a uniform color.

Even to me, a complete layman in this field, they looked like they would fetch a handsome price. How much could I get? My throat went dry and I swallowed hard with nervousness. I was dying from anxious anticipation, but the owner looked at the anklets, and then looked again. Then, he looked back and forth between the two anklets and my face and asked.

“Where in the world did you get these?”

“Well, that is to say….”

I vaguely trailed off my words. If I told him the truth, who in the world would believe this story? There was no way I could say that I was kidnapped by a dog from h**l, was forced into marriage, got pregnant and gave birth to puppies, and then was decorated with jewels by my dog husband as if I were a room being decorated. It was nothing short of crazy nonsense that would get me dragged straight to a mental hospital.

“They’re just heirlooms passed down in my family.”

The owner cleared his throat, ahem ahem. He said he would buy them right away, then suddenly got up from his chair and brought a huge bundle of bills from his safe.

Seeing the stack of bills as thick as an English dictionary, my eyes went wide. Adding just a little exaggeration, it was an amount that would more than fill a bathroom sink.

Is it really okay to receive this much? I wondered, but seeing the strange flush on the owner’s face, I could tell that he had skimmed quite a lot off the top.

“You know I gave you a good deal, right?”

Was it really okay to do this? A lingering feeling made my gaze keep returning to the anklets, but I soon shook off the regret. Since they were not mine to begin with, the one who should be regretful would be their owner.

“What about that one?”

The owner gestured to my hand with his chin. Wondering what he was talking about, I looked down at my hand. There, a ring I had forgotten I was even wearing was on my finger.

“Ah, this.”

It was the wedding ring Bulkan had put on my finger, saying it resembled the color of my eyes. …It was now a useless object. Since I did not need it anyway, and it was just cumbersome, I could just sell it.

“I’m not selling this one.”

I shook my head, saying I would not sell it. The owner smacked his lips in disappointment, tsk.

“If you ever change your mind, come here, don’t go off somewhere else. I’ll give you the best price in this neighborhood.”

I gave a half-hearted reply that I understood and quickly left the pawnshop. The fatigue was extreme. I was anxious and kept looking around my surroundings. Thump thump, my heart was pounding.

I had an overflowing amount of money. Not only had I never had such a large sum in my entire life, but carrying a bundle of cash in my hand made me feel extremely insecure.

Having more possessions opened up a great many choices for me. With this money, I could go anywhere I wanted, but since I had Haengbok with me, I could not go to a hotel. Instead, I went into the cleanest-looking motel among those nearby. The owner gave Haengbok an indifferent look, then crumpled his expression into a frown.

“No livestock, it’ll dirty the wallpaper.”

As if he knew they were talking about him, Haengbok whimpered, kkyae, and shrank back. Livestock. I was a little angry at the poor choice of words, but I pushed down my feelings.

“He doesn’t relieve himself just anywhere, he’s well-behaved and gentle.”

“Still no.”

He adamantly shook his hand. In danger of being turned away at the door again, I quickly took out some extra money and offered it to him. Then, his complaints immediately disappeared and he handed me the room key.

“You’ll have to pay extra if you want to use more towels.”

There was a brief squabble, but the room condition was quite decent.

I bought several cup ramens and water from a nearby mart. In my haste, I filled the coffee pot with water and polished off two cup ramens. Slurp, smack, slurp. I really s**ked up the noodles in the blink of an eye. There was also store-bought kimchi, so I ate to my heart’s content.

“Kkyaae!”

Haengbok was hanging on the window, wagging his tail. I thought he was in a good mood from the sunlight. Thinking it was a relief that he liked it, I looked down and saw a small puppy out for a walk with its owner. I was about to say something but then closed my mouth.

“Shall we play in the water?”

To divert his attention, I checked Haengbok’s front paws. They were covered in dirt from our trip to the park earlier.

“Is it fun?”

Haengbok, covered in white foam, swam around in the small bathtub. When I scrubbed his back, he made a kkaekkae sound and splashed the water. His cotton-puff paws paddled earnestly. After playing well for a while, he was suddenly staring blankly at something he had discovered again.

He must have seen some other flying insect, I thought, and glanced over nonchalantly.

“……”

I could not help but stare at it blankly too. It was none other than the dog shampoo I was looking at.

Shampoos for humans were too strong for animals to use. I had intentionally bought a gentle dog shampoo instead, but as fate would have it, there were pictures of puppies on the label.

It seemed Haengbok was also thinking of the babies.

I too stared blankly at the bubbles floating in front of my eyes. There was absolutely no way I could do anything about this longing that flowed in the air. Just… fully feeling it.

“Haengbok, you said you wanted to eat a peach earlier. Let’s hurry up and bathe and eat something delicious.”

Haengbok, who understood the words ‘something delicious’, excitedly kicked his feet. Whoosh, after thoroughly drying even the chest fur under his neck with a hairdryer until it was fluffy, I cut the well-ripened fruit into small pieces for him.

“Aeaet!”

It must have tasted good, as even his chest fur puffed up. Just looking at him made me feel full. He was eating so well, but then he left a few pieces, so I thought he was full. But he kept glancing at the peaches. He even drooled, unable to hold it back, drip drip.

“If you want to eat more, you can.”

Even though I said he could eat more, Haengbok steadfastly endured his desire to eat. As if he were leaving it for someone.

Lying on the soft bed with Haengbok and looking up at the white ceiling, it felt so incredibly unfamiliar.

“I’m really back.”

For no reason, my eyes grew hot and my chest swelled with emotion. I had no plans, no schedule. We just slept for a long, long time.

Haengbok also stuck close to my side, curling his back like a conch shell and snoring, purrrr purrrr. His warm body temperature was so nice. In case he might wake up and leave, I could not move a muscle. I just slept like a log. Still, it was a comfort I had not felt in a very long time.

When I opened my eyes, black darkness had already fallen outside.

“Are you hungry?”

“Kkyaae.”

This was a world where food could be delivered to your door with a single phone call. I looked at the delivery flyers stuck to the refrigerator. As I was looking at the menu of a Korean restaurant, Haengbok, curious, pushed his face forward.

Ding-d**g, the doorbell rang loudly. Haengbok, who was sensitive to sound, pricked up his ears and quickly ran behind the bed.

“Delivery.”

As the delivery man handed me a white bag and spoke, I heard the mumbling of a young deer from behind.

“Ae?”

From behind the bed, Haengbok, with only his eyes peeking out, looked up at the delivery man. His appearance in a helmet seemed very unfamiliar and strange to him.

“Huh? No, that.”

The delivery man was no less fascinated, staring at Haengbok. A brief standoff ensued.

“Is that by any chance a deer?”

“Yes.”

He glanced at me, then craned his neck to look at Haengbok. He seemed to want to get closer to look and pet him, but Haengbok made an aet sound and quickly hid under the blanket. Only his trembling ears were slightly visible.

“He seems to be shy around strangers.”

“Yes, …a little.”

The delivery man clicked his tongue, tsk, and left. I opened the plastic bag and took care of Haengbok’s portion first. I gave him the carrots that were served as a side dish, and he ate them, nyum nyum. The Korean carrots seemed to suit his palate and tasted good, as he gave me kisses on my cheek, peck peck.

When I opened the braised chicken, hot steam rose. I put the soy sauce seasoning on top of the fluffy rice grains and mixed it, slurp slurp. The glass noodles were also properly soaked in the broth, making it very delicious.

Haengbok was engrossed in watching television.

Haengbok used to have fun playing with the babies. There would be a limit to how much I could play with him, so I would turn on the television to relieve his boredom. Haengbok, finding it strange, approached the screen and tapped it with his front paw, pat pat.

“Kkyae.”

He seemed to be saying, come here and play with me, and asking what your name is. On the screen was the face of a National Assembly member who had committed a crime and was spouting nonsense.

The world’s news poured out as news. The world was still noisy and chaotic. All of it was things that happened when humans met humans.

“It gives me a headache, so let’s not watch things like that.”

I picked up the remote control and pressed the power button. Beep. The television turns off. The world instantly became quiet.

I lay in bed, hugging Haengbok. This small room might have been stuffy, but Haengbok seemed happy just to be alone with me. The sunlight seeping in through one side of the window felt good.

“Tomorrow, let’s take a walk in the park and then stop by the market to buy carrots.”

It was a promise that I was sorry for keeping you in such a cramped place, and that I would soon take you to a good place. Although I did not think that Haengbok, being a deer, could understand my words.

Staring at the empty ceiling like this, my thoughts branched out again in a contextless way. None other than the faces of the babies came to mind. In fact, rather than this being a sudden thought, it would be more accurate to say that as the surroundings became quiet, the subconscious that I had been trying to push to a corner floated up.

They would know I’m gone by now. Are they drinking their milk well? They were children who would cry their hearts out if I did not hold them. The thought of Lemon dealing with the babies crying alone, tweet tweet, made me feel very bad.

Moist eyes turned towards me. Kkyae, he l**ked my cheek with his tongue.

“I’m not crying.”

I wanted to stop with the gloomy thoughts right about there. So I deliberately went over my plans for tomorrow in my head. I’ll take a walk in the nearby park, then stop by the market right next to it to buy vegetables for Haengbok… Would three carrots and three cucumbers be enough? The refrigerator in the motel is too small, so I should only buy a little at a time. I tried my best to make plans one by one, avoiding the emotions that were creeping into my chest.

And after a little more than half a day, fruit flies gathered on the peaches. I secretly took the peaches that had withered lonely without an owner and threw them away. Looking at the things thrown in the trash can, my chest ached with a stinging pain. Just like the end of a fruit knife had accidentally cut me….

☀️

“Haengbok, let’s get dressed.”

Haengbok was originally a child from the forest. He naturally loved the high sky and clear air more than a gloomy life of sticking his nose in the corner of a room.

If it were winter now, his white fur color would have blended naturally with the white snowfield, but in the current season where the greenery was at its deepest and most verdant, he stood out too much and attracted the attention of the people around.

Worried about him walking on the rough asphalt, I put soft socks on him, and just in case, I also loosely put on a leash.

“Let’s go out now.”

We stopped by a nearby park. It was the season when the trees were a deep, lush green. It was full of things Haengbok liked. Like a fish in water, he roamed freely inside the park, smelling the flowers and stepping on the grass with his feet.

It seemed like his mood was soaring high for a moment. Young children immediately ran over and tried to stroke Haengbok’s fur. One of them even grabbed his tail abruptly. It happened to be when I was getting water from the drinking fountain, so I hadn’t been paying attention. Haengbok was startled and cried out, kkyaae!, then jumped into my arms.

“Why is his fur color white?”

“He’s still a baby, so he’s a bit scared of people. Do you want to say hello with just your hands first?”

The children went wow wow, and waved their hands wildly.

“Hey, deer! I’m saying hello to you.”

“You idiot, deer can’t understand human words.”

Haengbok just buried his nose in my chest. Since he got along well with the puppies, I thought he was not very shy. But it seemed he was very unfamiliar with seeing energetic young children for the first time.

“I don’t think he’s in the mood to say hello today.”

I was upset that they were being rude to Haengbok, but they were still young children. When I put it indirectly, the children quickly lost interest and left.

“Eh, this is no fun, you wanna go to a PC b**g instead.”

The children scattered and disappeared, and I stood there, drained and empty. Haengbok also seemed tired, as his chest fur drooped.

“Let’s just buy our food now and go home.”

On the way back to the motel after slowly stopping by the market to buy carrots and cucumbers. Rain started to fall, pitter-patter, so I quickened my pace. The raindrops were getting bigger, and my heart was uneasy.

Suddenly, Haengbok became fixated on something strange. It was none other than a doghouse in front of the motel. Haengbok approached it and cried, kkyaae. The leash was pulled taut.

“Aet.”

Haengbok approached and cried, kkyaae. With his upper body flat against the ground and his bottom raised, he wagged his tail wildly. It was a gesture of wanting to play together. Since he had spent time with the puppies, his behavior had many similarities to that of dogs.

“Grrrr.”

However, the dogs barked, woof woof!, and chased Haengbok away. Their eyes clearly seemed to say, get lost. He was not as big as Kkakka, but he was a pretty large fellow. His expression was so frightening that I was scared he might harm Haengbok, but Haengbok was just cheerful.

“Grrrrowl!”

The gangster dog bared his molars and growled. It seemed that Haengbok, who looked different from him, was very unfamiliar. Fortunately, he was on a leash so he could not get close, but I tensed up and pulled on the leash.

“Hurry and come here.”

Haengbok returned to me dejectedly, trudging along.

“That hyung-nim is a little busy right now.”

I held Haengbok in my arms and comforted him, patting him. Haengbok’s small ear brushed against the tip of my nose. His flapping ears were much limper than usual.

I could see what he was missing. That sight was so pitiful.

After returning to the motel, we bathed in warm water. Haengbok, who had been busy running around and playing, was sleepy and started to fuss, wandering around on the bed.

“It’s because you’re sleepy.”

Even though his eyes were completely closed, he could not fall asleep. It seemed it was because the environment was unfamiliar. When I laid down the clothes I had worn until now underneath him, he fell into a very deep sleep. Hiss, hiss. The sound of his breathing leaked out and echoed in the small room.

I let out a small sigh inwardly, whoo. It seemed it would take some time for Haengbok to adjust to this world. Pitter-patter. The sound of rain falling on the window filled the void. In the middle of it, lightning even struck, kururung, waking me from a light sleep.

The motel’s dog outside barked, arf arf. Jindo dogs often bark fiercely to protect their homes. Since the place was a motel, all the visitors would be strangers, so I did not think much of it. I tried to go back to sleep, but the sound of arf arf, scratched at the window all through the dawn as if it would break through the wall.

I tossed and turned. The noises from the window felt extremely violent. The sound of thunder, the sound of a dog barking… With the darkness lapping around, I could not help but think of the cave.

I spent the night with my eyes practically wide open.

The rain outside fell without stopping. The weather was a bit gloomy for an outing, but a motel room like this was too cramped for Haengbok, a wild animal, so I had to take him for a walk at least once a day.

I bought a yellow raincoat for a 7-year-old from a convenience store and put it on Haengbok.

“Thankfully, it fits well.”

As I fastened the buttons one by one, his fluffy fur was gradually covered. Fortunately, it fit a little loosely and well. When I even put the hood on, he looked up at me with his round eyes. He seemed to dislike the rustling sound it made every time he trotted and moved.

“It’s raining today, so you have to wear this so your fur doesn’t get w**.”

Haengbok liked water, but he hated getting his fur w**. It must have been uncomfortable to wear a rustling outfit for the first time, but he patiently endured it as if he really understood my words.

I took out a large umbrella and stepped outside the motel. Fortunately, it was quiet today, as the dog was inside its doghouse.

I quickened my pace towards the market. Whenever the crowd swelled, Haengbok was a bit shy, but he had learned that if he came here, he would get delicious food, so he really enjoyed going to look around.

“Oh my, look at that deer. Goodness, he even came wearing a raincoat today.”

I smiled awkwardly at the words of admiration. Receiving all the stares in the market, I stopped in front of a vegetable store. The owner misteress came out from inside and greeted Haengbok warmly.

“I was just wondering when you’d come.”

Wetting her hand with saliva, she tore off a black plastic bag with a rip.

“These couldn’t be sold, so I thought it would be good to feed the little one.”

She lifted a basket, and inside, small cut vegetables were gathered together. They were bumpy, as if the bruised parts had been cut off, but they looked very fresh.

“How much should I give you?”

I quickly tried to sort out some bills from my pocket, but the misteress stopped me.

“It’s alright, business isn’t good these days because of the rain. It makes me happy when Haengbok comes to see this old lady once in a while like this.”

She waved her hands so insistently that I could not offer anymore and had to put the bills back into my pocket.

“Little one, try some of this.”

Lowering her knees, she offered a slightly torn cabbage leaf. Haengbok looked up at me once. He seemed to be asking if it was okay to eat that. When I gave a small nod, Haengbok went forward, opened his mouth, and ate the cabbage leaf, crunch crunch.

“Aet.”

It must have been delicious, as he rubbed his cheek against the misteress’s knee.

“Oh my, look at him.”

Haengbok, who had learned the very correct value that people who give food are good people, just giggled, hehe, even when she stroked his head. He had been trapped in the cave and had only met me, so I was worried about what would happen if his social skills did not develop properly. But fortunately, he was getting along well.

“Hey, you rascal!”

A loud voice came from behind the misteress. The vegetable store misteress’s husband came out with a fly swatter and teased him, saying he was cute. At the overly large action, Haengbok got scared and quickly hid behind me.

“Thank you.”

On the way out after receiving the plastic bag. For some reason, my mind was not at ease, and my footsteps gradually slowed down. There was a place nearby that sold sweet pancakes and sweet potatoes, so I bought some to-go and gave them to them. I also broke off a little bit of sweet potato for Haengbok to taste.

“Is it edible?”

It seemed that baked things were not his preference, as he ate it half-heartedly. I brushed off the sweet potato smeared around his mouth and then diligently moved my feet again.

I loitered in front of a clothing store that sold sportswear. It was the first time I was buying such expensive clothes, so I felt a little awkward. From inside, a jingle sound was heard first, and then the door opened.

“We’re currently having a sale with up to 30 percent off, come on in and take a look.”

I hesitated and then said.

“Um, I came with a deer.”

“There are clothes inside, so you can just tie him up here for a moment.”

The employee said it was okay and urged me to come in quickly. I slipped inside and tied the leash to the doorknob. I wondered if it was okay to leave him like this.

Haengbok watched the outside, where the rain was gently stopping, through the transparent door. If there was a rainbow caught in a puddle, he would stare at it for a long time, and if people passed by making splashing sounds, he would watch that too and imitate them by rolling his front paws. It was a relief that he was playing well.

“Is there anything you need?”

I scratched the back of my neck awkwardly and replied. My belly was gradually getting bigger, so I needed something to cover my body.

“I’d like to look at some clothes. A short-sleeved T-shirt and a windbreaker.”

The employee said he would find something that suited me well and rummaged through the clothing store. Faced with his abundant passion, I, who was not accustomed to such service, felt quite awkward. I had only picked out two short-sleeved T-shirts to wear as a couple with Haengbok and one windbreaker.

“226,000 won with a 30 percent discount comes to 158,200 won.”

Such a large sum came out. To think that just three pieces of cloth cost over 150,000 won. I felt my hands trembling. Soon, I hardened my heart and paid exactly 200,000 won in cash. When I was about to leave through the door, people were gathered in a small group, taking pictures of Haengbok, click click.

“Cute, really wow, so cute.”

No one was acting excessively, and everyone was taking a step back and just adoring him, so his chest fur puffed up with confidence.

“…Excuse me, I need to get through for a moment.”

With Haengbok, who was full of confidence and walking proudly with his chest puffed out, I diligently moved to another place. The last place I stopped by was the community service center.

To live in the land of South Korea, there was something absolutely essential, and that was an identification card. The procedure for reissuing it was also very simple. All I had to do was go into the nearest community service center, get a number ticket, and wait.

“Customer number 17, please come to window number 3.”

And when my number was called, I found my spot.

I naturally thought I would be able to get my resident registration card issued smoothly, but something a little unexpected happened.

“What did you just say?”

Thinking I did not understand him correctly, his voice grew even louder.

“Mr. Gu Myeongha has already been processed as deceased.”

The voice, steeped in routine, once again entered my ears.

“Ah….”

I dragged out my words. I was a person who had vanished from this land for several months without a sound, without a trace. It was something that could certainly happen. I had failed to consider it. It was foolish of me to just think about returning to the motel to warm myself in the hot water with Haengbok.

“Looks like you didn’t know.”

The public official stood up from his chair. Then, with a deep sigh, he handed me a document.

“Mr. Gu Gilhwan is your father, correct? He definitely came and filed the death certificate.”

It was clearly written that way on the document in front of me.

“To correct this, you’ll have to go to the family court first, then come back to apply for an ID card.”

Tsk tsk, the official clicked his tongue. I paused for a moment, an uneasy feeling suddenly striking my chest.

“Excuse me, do you happen to know when the death was reported?”

“When was it, you ask?”

The official lifted the document once more and ran his finger over the date. I took in the series of numbers. Then I slowly recalled the memory. If my memory was not mistaken, there was definitely a fire at my house at dawn on that day.

When you think about it, it was something that could easily happen. The house burned down completely, so he could have filed a death certificate. However, for that person to have done it, there was something too suspicious about it.

He was a man who had never paid the electricity bill on time. The gas bill was also always late, and he was the type to frequently come to our house demanding money. He was a man who threw away all household duties and roamed the streets like a hooligan.

But I did not understand why he had so readily filed the death certificate. As if he had been waiting just for this.

“……”

The feeling was so strange.

“In my 20 years of public service, this is the first time I’ve seen a case like this. I’ve only heard about it occasionally, you know? A family member doesn’t return, so they file a death certificate for the time being, but then they find them later and file a correction. What kind of story did a young person have to go through….”

I bowed my head in thanks and trudged out of the community service center. I listlessly pulled on Haengbok’s leash. The hand holding the umbrella kept tilting,툭툭, and I had to readjust my grip several times.

I stood blankly in front of the traffic light. It was something that could easily happen. So why did I have this uneasy feeling?

If I were to withdraw the death certificate, my father would eventually find out. A strange intuition suddenly reared its head. For some reason, a very strong feeling struck me that my father would cause a huge scene if he found out I was alive.

Caught in a whirlwind of thoughts, I could not even take a step, when,

“Aet?”

I heard a small cry and snapped back to my senses.

Perhaps noticing my downcast mood, Haengbok, who had been playing by splashing in a puddle, tilted his head. I forced a smile, saying it was nothing.

“Haengbok, we need to go home and take a bath. Your feet are all w**.”

When we reached the front of the motel, the entire parking lot was a muddy mess. The ground, soggy from the rain, was covered with several footprints. Worried that Haengbok’s body would get w**, I quickly scooped him up into my arms. My clothes were all stained, but I did not really mind.

“Aet!”

Haengbok started crying again, looking towards the doghouse. The gangster dog was digging a hole for some reason, I wondered what he was doing in this weather. Watching him, a voice suddenly cut into my thoughts.

‘I want to bury you in the ground. And I’ll only open it up when I want to see you.’

A shiver ran through my entire body, and my spine trembled. I pretended not to see and quickly hurried my steps.

“That hyung is busy. Let’s go home and play in the water.”

I righted the struggling Haengbok and entered the motel.

And the next day. As I was heading to the convenience store for a moment to buy water, I discovered a completed hole. It was the one the dog had been excitedly digging yesterday. I was about to just pass by pretending not to see it, when I noticed something strange.

“Huh?”

The footprints imprinted around the hole… were incredibly large. They were almost comparable to a bear’s paw.

Just in case, I looked at the dog’s paw in front of the doghouse. It was just the paw of an ordinary large dog. No matter how much of a small town this was, there was no way a bear would have come down.

On the day it rained heavily, the dog had barked nonstop. I had a feeling it might have been barking at the owner of those footprints. Whatever it was.

I had a very uneasy feeling. I felt a sudden chill and shook my head vigorously, looking around.

However, as always, the surroundings were peaceful and quiet. Thinking of Haengbok who would be alone in the room, I forced myself to move, but I felt strange somewhere.

As I was returning to the motel room, I stopped dead in front of the door. A transparent plastic bag was placed in front of it.

“Huh?”

Why was there delivery food that I had not ordered? It seemed like something that was supposed to go to another room had been delivered incorrectly.

As I lifted it to check the delivery address, drip drip. Raindrops fell. The bag was damp because of the rain outside. A savory smell instantly spread to the tip of my nose. Through the opaque lid, I could see the glass noodles sloshing around. It was hot short rib soup.

For no reason, saliva pooled in my mouth, and I swallowed, gulp. It was not even mine, yet coveting it was utterly shameless.

“Ah, what should I do with this….”

Food, after all, is all about warmth. I felt like I should return it quickly before it got cold…. The writing on the receipt had all melted away because of the rain.

I turned my body half a circle and looked at the room across the hall.

“……”

After a moment of hesitation, I pressed the doorbell button. Ding-d**g, the sound cautiously echoes in the empty hallway. There was no answer. Is no one here? I was about to turn back when I heard a presence from the direction of the door.

“Who is it?”

Soon, the door opened with a clatter, and a mister in an undershirt came out. His impression was very strong. His thick forearms were sturdy, as if he had pulled a radish straight from the ground, and his forearms were completely covered in hair. The thought even crossed my mind that perhaps he too transformed into a beast at night.

“What is it?”

As he grumbled with a surly expression, his sideburns twitched along. Don’t they say you can’t spit on a smiling face? I forced a smile and held up the bag.

“Excuse me, did you happen to order delivery food?”

“Aish, what the. Some trivial thing waking me up from my morning sleep, for f**k’s sake.”

And then the door slammed shut in my face with a b**g. A cold wind whipped across my face. A woman’s voice flying from beyond the wall scratched at my ears.

“Honey, who was that?”

“I don’t know, f**k. I was tense for a second, thinking it was my old lady.”

A vulgar conversation could be heard from inside.

“Aww, you said your wife went to her parents’ house. I thought my heart was going to shrink to the size of a bean for no reason.”

“Ooh-hoong-hoong-hoong, my little baby’s heart shrank to the size of a bean? Then did your bottom shrink too? This oppa’s gonna take a look, shall I?”

Kyaa, a scream is heard. Haaang, haa, hang! Sounds that were utterly embarrassing to hear in broad daylight continued.

Urgh, it really makes my stomach turn…. I squeezed my eyes shut. I had passed by them in the hallway yesterday. The atmosphere was strangely sticky, and it seems they were indeed in such an immoral relationship.

“Haaa.”

I looked down at the bag in my hand once more. Of all places, because of the location, I could not go around knocking on every door like this. I needed to know which store it was from to at least give them a call, but even the address was completely erased…. The whole situation was hopeless.

I eventually went down to the lobby. As I approached the front desk, the owner, who was reading a newspaper, pulled down his magnifying glasses.

“Excuse me, mister owner, I think this was delivered to me by mistake.”

He gestured with his eyes, asking what it was.

“It’s food, I think it’s short rib soup. The address is all washed away by the rainwater.”

“If a guest asks for it, I’ll give it to them, so just leave it there.”

Annoyance dripped from his tone. His gesture of turning the newspaper page showed no sincerity at all. Is it really okay to leave this here like this? I hesitated and placed the bag in front of the front desk.

“…Yes, I understand.”

Hesitating, I adjusted its position one more time to make it more visible. I looked back several times with an uneasy feeling.

When I returned to the room, Haengbok was tightly hugging a bundle of towels. I had not been able to pack his favorite stuffed toy when we escaped from the cave. I put my clothes inside and roughly rolled it up, and he seemed to like it.

“……”

I sat still on the bed.

It was now just entering the first week since I came here. The rain is still drizzling outside the window, and the surroundings are just quiet.

I wonder if it can really be this peaceful. Often, when I’m lost in thought amidst the peace, that question would creep into my chest.

…Why haven’t I been caught yet? Did I really succeed in escaping? It really left me with so many questions.

At this point, I even wonder if Bulkan has decided to abandon me. He might not have felt the need to expend the energy to follow me this far.

Empusa had said she decided to take him as her husband, and I wonder if that plan succeeded. I pulled my knees to my chest and wrapped my arms around them.

Was that obsession going to disappear so easily? He had shown a mad persistence, like he was truly insane.

☀️

In the end, the food did not find its owner. I discovered it much later, thrown into the trash can in the motel lobby, and smacked my lips, tsk. It must have been delicious, which was why the food was a waste. But that was only for a moment, and it soon faded from my memory.

Quiet days continued. It was very peaceful, and happy.