JADE 18

‘You’re the one who flipped the game board we were playing on. What the hell are you saying with such a meaningful tone?’

He must have asked to drink alone just to say crap like this. To declare he wouldn’t leave any room for hope the moment I mistook the nice atmosphere for something more, to cut off my expectations!

I know the “something” and whatever else is all over. That’s why I was just going to give up and watch, since I’d gotten interested in cheerleading.

He had been a little withdrawn lately, having felt lonely for the first time in his life, but Jin Sejun was fundamentally a human being packed solid with self-esteem and confidence. He had lived as a victor who never gave a thought to why he was having pathetic thoughts, a perfect alpha who had nothing to be disappointed about.

“So, what’s your intention? I hate it when people hide their true meaning when they talk, except for flirting.”

“Mr. Sejun.”

“You and I have completely opposite personalities, don’t we? The moment you feel even a little burdened, you tuck your tail and run. Are all betas like that?”

“It’s not because I’m a beta—”

“What, you’re not trying to say that the defensive Kwon Joowan, because of such emotional scars, rejected me too… are you? Getting rejected is getting rejected, but if that’s the reason, I think I’d be pissed.”

“……”

“Were you perhaps surprised by how accurate my interpretation was? I may not know a lot, but I’m not an idiot.”

If you wanted to cut me off, why did you touch me when we were alone? Why do you keep giving me hope and then taking it away? Then you shouldn’t have chased away that omega coach. Let me have a go with them!

Though he was agitated, Jin Sejun’s demeanor was still calm, and his voice was cold.

“Why do I have to get splashed with the shit water of your past?”

“Ah.”

For someone with so many complexes about their looks, for someone with lactose intolerance, for a half-assed amateur who only posts videos of himself jacking off….

Even the glasses that had been changing Jin Sejun’s impression couldn’t filter his temper this time. Annoyed by them belatedly, he roughly took them off and shoved them into his coat pocket.

“Someone else got hurt, so I don’t understand why you’re acting like you’re the one in pain.”

“I….”

“Spit it out, whatever it is. I think I can land a clean punch and start a fight if you say just one more word, so go on and blabber.”

“……”

As expected, martial arts did not suit Kwon Joowan. It was certain he was not the type of person to intentionally hurt others while working out.

Kwon Joowan’s expression remained blank, but his gaze gradually started to wander.

A moment later, perhaps due to the alcohol, a flush spread across his cheeks, unfitting of the atmosphere. The moment Jin Sejun saw that, his tension completely dissipated.

He even looked strangely pleased, which made me wonder if he was happy that his plan to make me lose interest was working well.

“What am I doing with a beta… forget it. What kind of defensive game are you playing? It’s true I had some lingering feelings for your ass, but not anymore, so don’t count your chickens before they hatch.”

“Ass…?”

“There you go again, pretending you don’t know anything.”

Then again, for a beta who almost paired up with an omega, he might find that side of things unfamiliar. No matter how big he is, a beta is a beta. Aren’t all of them, except alphas, the ones who want an alpha’s penis?

The old-fashioned alpha Jin Sejun mischievously squeezed Kwon Joowan’s waist.

“I think I’ll think about it every night… it’s okay if I masturbate, right?”

“Ye… huh?”

“I’m going to film a video and post it too. I’ll cum while saying your name.”

“Mr. Sejun! How could you say such a thing….”

Kwon Joowan, his face turning red and purple, clamped a hand over Jin Sejun’s mouth. But he quickly snatched his hand back, springing away as if he’d been burned.

“Why’d you pull back? I’m saying I’ll make do with my fingers even though I want to suck you off there. Can’t you give me that much?”

It was a statement for which the only comfort was that no one was seeking out the corner convenience store table on this fine night. Kwon Joowan, who hadn’t been able to respond properly to a single thing since earlier, let out a torrent of words.

“That, that seems like a very inappropriate action. I’m glad you understood what I meant, Mr. Sejun, but I think it would be best to avoid this kind of contact in the future.”

“You’re not telling me to stop coming to the academy.”

“That’s not under my authority. There’s Yiseo, too….”

“Is the deputy director that useless? Jeez, I could do that job.”

A hint of laughter was thick in Jin Sejun’s tone. Realizing belatedly the jest mixed in with the bombshell remarks, Kwon Joowan wiped his face frantically.

“…You can’t throw people, Mr. Sejun….”

“Haha.”

Really, I was so pissed I wanted to punch him, but I don’t know why I calmed down the moment I saw his face. Kwon Joowan was Kwon Joowan for not countering a single one of my abusive remarks, but there was probably no pushover in the world like Jin Sejun.

At some point, the space between his eyes and nose began to sting, but nothing could break Jin Sejun’s smile. He looked alternately at the ground and the sky, then took out another cigarette from the pack he had bought earlier and put it to his lips.

“Alright, I get it… it’s okay if I keep going to the academy, right?”

Kwon Joowan, who couldn’t even look at Jin Sejun out of the corner of his eye, answered without difficulty.

“…It’s not under the deputy director’s authority.”

“I’m going to go. I have to get up early tomorrow.”

He realized only later that it was the exact same excuse, word for word, that Kwon Joowan had given Coach Hong earlier. …What did it matter? Kwon Joowan wouldn’t care whether Jin Sejun really slept in or woke up at the crack of dawn.

As Jin Sejun waved his hand and stood up, Kwon Joowan hailed a taxi for him.

“I was going to call a designated driver, but you’re being annoying to the very end.”

“It’s close, so come running for exercise tomorrow.”

“Can the deputy director just tell people to come and go on a Sunday….”

“Or, if you give me your car keys, I can bring it to you tomorrow.”

“…That’s okay.”

Such an insincere service. He definitely hadn’t drunk much, but his whole body felt limp, and his vision kept blurring. Kwon Joowan gave the address instead of Jin Sejun, who was practically shoved into the back seat.

‘He still remembers my home address.’

He thought there might have been a brief squabble about whether Kwon Joowan would get in the car with him or not. After the car started, he looked back and saw Kwon Joowan standing there, watching him for a long time.

It was obvious he wouldn’t be able to see him from over there, but not wanting to leave just like that, Jin Sejun held up a stiff middle finger to the rear window. Then he fell asleep for a bit.

If a guy who works out at the crack of dawn every day asks you out for a drink, isn’t that totally it? It was a “something,” wasn’t it? You asked if I wasn’t curious about sex, didn’t you?

Yes, I was fucking curious!

Why is a bastard who posts videos of himself jacking off on social media playing so hard to get? Is he only posting jacking off videos? Isn’t he a slut?

It was only last month that he had finished imagining a successful romance with Kwon Joowan, leading to marriage. Beta men can’t have children, but he didn’t think family had to be connected by blood, so adoption was an option. Aren’t married couples also not related by blood?

He had never thought it possible to be ordinary friends with someone he’d had something with, but seeing as he’d managed it this time, he thought he might be cooler than he realized.

…Like hell he was. As soon as he got home, he fumbled with the front of his pants.

“Son of a bitch….”

Why the hell was he getting turned on after being rejected? It seemed his tastes had been completely remodeled during this time. Recalling Kwon Joowan’s ass, which he had touched while feigning innocence, or the dick he had openly stared at, it was a smooth process.

What kind of omega was the fiancé? Judging by the pheromones that had rubbed off on him back then, they were likely a truly omega-like omega.

I’m so envious….

Of course, he was envious of Kwon Joowan for having dated such an omega intensely! Though his eyes had strayed for a moment, if he could choose between the omega and Kwon Joowan, Jin Sejun would naturally choose the former (Jin Sejun was always good at counting his chickens before they hatched in situations where the giver had no intention of giving anything).

“Haaah….”

After coming once, he logged into the sex account with relative composure. During the time he had neglected to check his feed, ‘Beta’ also seemed to have been offline, but he was currently broadcasting a video of himself masturbating in real time.

‘Crazy bastard.’

Thank you for jacking off live on this fine weekend night. The voyeuristic angle was still good, but it would be nice if he filmed it so his genitals and body were a little more visible. Raise the lighting, get rid of the obstructions.

If he knew its flaccid state, he could compare it with Kwon Joowan’s, but from the start, he had taken out a formidably thick one, and it was cast in shadow.

Does Kwon Joowan’s size change a lot between flaccid and erect? Even his flaccid size was considerable for a beta, so I hope it doesn’t get any bigger than that, that it’s as small as possible.

‘Beta’ is an alpha, so he can be that big, but Kwon Joowan is a real beta, so there was no way.

Grind, the sound of teeth grinding came from the earphones. ‘Beta,’ who was always listless, had been acting quite the alpha lately whenever he came online after a long time.

“Ha, really….”

For some reason, even after a good orgasm, he kept feeling sad. Jin Sejun wiped his hands and trudged out to the living room to open a bottle of whiskey. It was something he had picked up at the duty-free shop before, thinking it would be a shame to come back with nothing.

Why is that ‘Beta’ bastard, born so privileged, always living in solitary confinement? It might be nice to meet him once.

No, is it that common for someone with such great specs to be alone? For all I know, on the days ‘Beta’ doesn’t post videos, he might be surrounded by people, bursting into happy laughter.

Unlike Jin Sejun, who was problematic in many ways….

“Ugh….”

His head was heavy. He had drunk somaek, then canned beer, and then chugged whiskey, so his stomach felt like a garbage can. Still, thanks to the whiskey, it could be considered an expensive hangover.

Perhaps because of his shitty condition, thinking about yesterday’s events stirred up hostility instead of sadness. It was a new realization, but it seemed that whenever he faced that damn beta, he often acted aggressively in situations where the professional Jin Sejun would never argue back.

It was as if he became sensitive, just like when dealing with another alpha.

Then again, there are no dynamic types or borders when it comes to being that annoying. He had just been greatly disappointed because he had briefly hoped, by himself, that he could have a romance like other people… something that had been hopeless.

Yesterday he had wallowed in all sorts of self-pity, but as he mulled over the fact that a beta had drawn the line with him in such a way, the original prideful Jin Sejun began to revive.

‘I’m losing interest….’

In American movies and dramas, divorced couples remain friends, and people who dated and broke up become best friends. He’d always wondered how such a thing was possible, but it seemed Kwon Joowan, who had a taste of American culture, was capable of it.

After all, he was still in contact with his ex-fiancé omega and accepting their advice, or rather, malicious remarks, about his appearance.

Jin Sejun wasn’t lacking or desperate enough to form a relationship where he was at a disadvantage. He had gotten everything he could from meeting Kwon Joowan, as he had made him realize that even a beta could be a possibility.

In the first place, Jin Sejun had only been hanging around because he wanted to have a beta friend. There was no need to hate him so much, so he could just meet another beta and open a new chapter in his life.

Therefore, it also didn’t make sense to throw away cheerleading, which he was slowly getting interested in, or his niece’s support, just because one mere beta made him uncomfortable.